“He likes me.” Sarah plucked another rose petal, her lips spreading apart as she looked down at the last remaining two. She had been at it for a few minutes and by now, she already knew what her answer would be and yet, she ignored it and carried on anyway as if she wasn’t aware.
“He likes me not.” She plucked another quail petal that wrinkled in her grasp, and this time her lips pushed themselves together and trembled in anticipation while her eyelids drifted further apart.
“He… likes me.” She plucked the very last petal. When the realization shot through her body like electricity, she quickly released the petal from the hold of her fingertips, letting it flitter to the ground against the soft breeze. As for the empty stem that laid still in her other hand like a terrible reminder of the perplexity she was currently facing, she dropped it as well but instead of letting it rest peacefully against the trimmed lawn grass, she lifted her bare feet and trampled upon it, her face screwing up with utter resent.
She was wrong, right? Damon didn’t like her. He only likes and cares about himself… well maybe he cared a little about her since he always made sure that she ate and slept alright, but that didn’t mean he liked her, did it? Damon Kalesto wasn’t capable of liking anyone… no one at all, not even the countless persons who served him, not even Jason who considered him as his friend. And seeing as how he still acts all impassive most of the time, she even started to doubt that he even feels anything from their mate bond anymore, while on her side, one single touch could make her go crazy… literally.
And furthermore, he’s positive, VERY disturbingly positive that she liked him, yet she had no idea how he felt at all. What kind of unfairness is this?
Sarah slapped herself on the face… hard. The stupidness that was running around in her head was the fault of none other than Damon Kalesto. He was the one who brought up that stupid thing about liking her in the first place. And then from there, she derived many other things that needed immediate addressing. If he thought that she liked him… then what was she to think about him? Was she to assume that he likes her as well since he assumed first? Or was she supposed to sit and wait until he confesses?
But then again, who even told him that she liked him?
Sarah’s lips curled in distaste. He claims she fiddles her fingers when she lies? That was utterly ridiculous. Yeah, she was happy for his slight change in demeanour. Yeah, she felt both accomplished and excited for getting him to smile sincerely at least once in his life. And yes, she wanted to continue to mend him until he was the most likeable as he could possibly be. But that didn’t mean she liked him.
Sarah thought back to the moment when she had that incessant talk with Jason. He had mentioned something about liking a sex-slave he just met and not knowing what to do since she wasn’t his mate. When she had asked why he liked her… he simply said that she was someone who he was happy around and wanted to be with for the rest of his life. If she took that as the definition of ‘like’ then she was utterly doomed, because then she’d be in the same boat as Jason… liking someone that is.
Damon was getting more and more generous by the day. He had even gone out a little while ago to buy her Nutella the second after realizing that she finished them all. So if you asked her if she wanted to stay with him, then that’d be yes. Not because he bought her Nutella whenever she wanted but because this was like a dream come true. A big house with practically everything she wanted, someone to cook for her and someone to keep her company. That was all she wanted so of course she’d stay with him for the rest of her life if he wanted her to.
But when it came to happiness, she wasn’t so sure. Life on the streets was filled with ups and downs and life in the dungeon was pure agony. But here? Life wasn’t so bad, in fact, it wasn’t bad at all. Damon wasn’t treating her coldly anymore and she even made friends. For the first time, she actually felt like she belonged somewhere. Isn’t that what people called happiness?
“So then, if I am happy here…” Sarah swallowed thickly, dreading the next words that would leave her own lips. “… and want to stay with Damon for a longggg time, isn’t that proof that I do actually like him?”
“What are you doing?”
Damon’s deep voice rumbled over the thoughts in her head, causing her eyes to immediately shift course towards him. She quickly stepped back, her heart thumping hard against her chest due to fright.
“How long have you been there?”
“Since you stomped on the flower, got angry out of nowhere and slapped yourself.” He stepped forward and stopped in front of her, his arm outstretching a small clear bag filled with jars of Nutella.
Sarah lowered her head in embarrassment as she reached out and took the bag from his grasp before dropping her hand laxly to her side. “Thanks.”
“Why are you out here?” He came to stand beside her, his eyes doing his house a once over before they swept back over to her.
“I just wanted some fresh air to clear my thoughts.”
“What did you have on your mind?” He asked, glancing at the stem peeking out from under her feet. “You looked distressed back there.”
Sarah pursed her lips. How was she supposed to tell him that she was mulling over that day till now? Scratch that. How was she supposed to know if he liked her or not? She wanted to get it off her chest as soon as possible but she wasn’t sure how. She wasn’t even sure what she wanted his answer to be. If she just asked him outright, then she’d only make herself look stupid in front of him. She definitely didn’t want that. So instead, she needed to find out two things: 1. Was he happy with her? And 2. Did he want her to stay?
She’d decipher whether he liked her or not based on his answer to those… That was probably the only way her mind would be at ease.
“If I were to leave, would you be sad?” She ended up wording it like that after much thought, her eyes finally looking up at him.
After comprehending her sentence, Damon’s face instantly contorted into one of confusion, his eyes looking at her as if she had just asked the most ridiculous question ever. Sarah instantly became dispirited at the sight of it. If he thought her question was so ridiculous then his answer would most definitely be a big fat NO.
“It’s either a yes or no.” She told him sharply, her eyes dropping once again as her lips downturned.
“What kind of question is that? When have you ever seen me sad?” Damon asked, overlooking the fact that the look in her eyes had completely changed.
“I see.” Sarah was about to dejectedly turn on her feet and walk away, but then, Damon spoke up again, stopping her in her tracks.
“What do you intend to do? Leave?” His deep voice stretched the words, each bearing its own share of resentment. “You can’t leave without my permission and that is something that you’ll never get. I told you from the first day we met that you’d stay by my side. I meant that.”
“I wasn’t planning on leaving.” She assured bitterly. If it was any other time, she probably feel like jelly by now as a result of the possessiveness his words carried but at the moment you could say she was feeling a bit under the weather. Afterall, Damon had just indirectly confirmed that he didn’t reciprocate her feelings without a second thought.
Sarah ran hand over the nape of her neck. She should’ve known that he would say something like that. After all, Damon would always be Damon. “I was just curious whether you’d care if I left or not.” She looked at him, her toes idly playing with the grass under her feet. “… guess not.”
“If I would care?” Damon said, eyes still giving her that same ‘are you ridiculous’ look. “Everything about you is annoying but you’re the only company I have here. Without you, the whole house would be as empty as it was before…”
Sarah blinked. “But you said–”
“You asked if I would be sad.” He clarified, “Have you already forgotten that I am Damon Kalesto? An Alpha never feels sadness.”
Sarah’s face scrunched up in annoyance but on the inside, she was feeling a totally different emotion. It was nice to know that he would actually care if she left…. even if he worded it in an unromantic way. And perhaps, it wasn’t that he wouldn’t be sad…. it was just that his pride as an Alpha wouldn’t allow him to admit it.
“Have you eaten already?” Damon asked suddenly, dragging her out of her thoughts, “We need to go out.”
“Go out?” Sarah arched a brow.
“I’m going shopping. It’ll probably take a while so I won’t leave you here alone.”
Her frown came back. “Don’t you have a lot of subjects? Why don’t you let them do it?”
“I don’t trust anyone. The only person I’d entrust with anything is Jason, no one else.”
Sarah thought he wasn’t making use of his privileges but didn’t comment on it. He’d probably lecture her if she did. “I’ll go get dressed then.” Without another word, she jogged off with the bag swinging back and forth in her hand. When she reached their room, she grabbed the first clothes her hands caught… which happened to be a simple floral red dress. She stripped herself of her clothes and slipped on the dress swiftly before turning around to examine herself.
The examination was brief, but within that time, Sarah managed to spot a photograph peaking out from the drawer residing at the very bottom of the dresser. Damon must not have realized it since he always kept it closed night and day.
Without much thought, she stooped down and reached for the photo, pulling it out. The first thing she noticed was the words written on the back. ‘I’m happy when you’re happy. I love you, Damon.’
After her eyes scanned those words, a bad feeling immediately ran along her spine but nonetheless, Sarah eased back and slowly, she overturned the photo, revealing something that made her chest tighten. Damon was sitting around a circular table and behind him there was a beautiful woman who’s arm was wrapped tightly around him and her chin resting on his shoulder. Knowing Damon, seeing someone touch him with such ease was surprising enough… but aside from that, there was something else that far surpassed that shock.
… Damon was smiling brightly, brighter than she had ever seen before.
Not a small, wobbly smile but a full blown, happy smile that stretched from ear to ear and showcased his pearly white teeth. At first, Sarah had doubted that this person here was Damon, but his hazel eyes, his long black hair, the shape of his face and the slight dip of his lips were all the same… it was definitely Damon, but a different version of Damon from the one right now.
If she thought he was happy around her, then he was more than happy around this woman… whoever she was.