LET’S BREAK UP
Reid had been by himself, wallowing in whatever feeling he found himself, regardless of whether it was fitting or not. He has been lagging and he needed to pick himself back up.
He had failed to convince Maria to be for him and now, all he had left within him was to let her be. He lost, he had lost to Kyros.
This morning was one of the mornings where he felt no motivation whatsoever to do anything and within him, he wasn’t willing to force anything.
He was turning in bed, which was a habitual thing for him to do since he couldn’t sleep at all. He had been staying up all night like this for more than a month with nothing exceptional in his mind to sort out.
He hissed fervently at the ring of his phone. As usual, he wasn’t motivated by the slightest things and not even a phone call was a willing thing for him to do. He had turned against the world, not only because he didn’t have Maria but because he had failed. He was never the type to fail. He hates to fail.
He checked the caller and the miracle call seems to have done wonders by brightening his long-time sullen face up a notch.
“Hey, Des. What’sup, man?” he asked with a little smile cooking up at the corner of his mouth as he sat up in bed.
“Man, I’m good. It’s been like decades since I last heard from you,”
“I haven’t had the motivation to hang out these days,” he replied.
“Oh, you’ve been getting down with the girl?” Des said teasingly but Reid seems not to get the humour in his words.
“What do you mean? What girl?”
“Come on. The girl we talked about,”
“Don’t you think it’s too early for this? I’m kind of in a gloomy mood, man,”
“Hold up. She hasn’t been doing you well? Does that mean you lost?” Des was starting to piss him off and he really wasn’t having it. That was the least thing he needed in his life at the moment, not even this morning.
“You should have thought better before calling,” he dodged the phone from his ear and he was about to end the call when Des spoke again.
“We should all hang out. It’s been a while we did,”
Des was known to be one to conjoin everyone, regardless of anyone’s location or the aura surrounding their abode. But then, Reid knew there had never been anything good that soars out of their hangout.
“I’m not sure, for real,” Reid answered as he walked to the toilet to pee.
“Come on. You said you haven’t been getting the motivation lately. Let’s give you that motivation. Let’s be that motivation. We actually have a lot to catch up on. I promise it’s gonna be worth it,”
Reid shook his head as if Des could see him. He wasn’t sure if it was ever going to be worth it. There had never been a night that was worth it. He had tons of flashbacks that keeps pushing through in his head.
“I’m not sure, Desmond,” he knew Des was not the type to let go easily but he always surrenders whenever Reid calls his full name or even anyone.
“That doesn’t work anymore. Be there at the usual spot by 7. We’d all be there,” he ended the call as he finalized it all. He knew he had no choice but to be there.
It had been a long time since he hung out with his rancher friends and this time seems to be the perfect time for that as he needed it.
As he walked back to his bed, dragging his foot redundantly, his mind went back to the girl Des had mentioned.
It wasn’t all clear to him anymore and though he remembered what they had all agreed on still, it felt blurry to him.
It had been a very long time since he saw Maria and they hadn’t even run into each other in the hallway or the elevator like fate or whatever in the universe that was responsible for sometimes making it happen.
He needed to see her. He needed her to ascertain that he lost and Kyros won. He needed her to tell him again to his face that he wasn’t wanted maybe he’d be able to move on and accept it all. But he didn’t want Maria to be with Kyros. Not him!
He tried to look in his mirror as he stared hard at himself.
“You are Giannis Reid Martakis! You don’t chase, you don’t beg. You stand firm in pride and choose dominance to ride. You attract what you want and it simply finds you. You don’t bend your rules as you are the successor to the Martakis family. You protect your ego without backlash. You need to get your shit together!” he said to himself as he pointed his index finger to his reflection through the mirror.
He ruffled his hair, groaning harshly with his fist clenched firmly in a ball as he walked briskly towards the door before he could stop himself, disappointing his mantra and his egotistical self.
He rang the doorbell to Maria’s apartment before he could turn back and decide against it. He rang it severally but she wouldn’t open up. He got a little worried and a little mad at himself for standing shirtless by her door.
“Maria. Maria, are you there?” he called out but there was no reply to his masculine voice.
Leaving behind the rough and tumble going on in his head, he knocked on the door which still yielded no response, causing him to bang heavily on it.
“Reid,” Maria called her name softly. He could hear his name being called. He rested his ear against the door to hear her voice well.
“Maria, are you good?”
“Reid,” she called again and it seems to him that the voice was not coming from inside the apartment. “What are you doing here?” she added as she touched his shoulder, causing him to turn back to face her.
“I… Uhm. I just felt…” he stopped in his words as Kyros showed up.
“You didn’t have to get this much stuff…” Kyros also stopped speaking as he walked closer and sighted Reid.
“Hey, Reid,” Kyros greeted and Reid responded with his head, tucking his hands in his pocket
“I’ll just drop by later,” Reid said before walking away. He felt a pint of embarrassment beat the back of his chest as he hurriedly walks off after he was out of sight.
“I’m indeed a dickhead!” he said to himself as he slaps his head.
Maria looked in his direction, even after he had left.
“Why was he here?” Kyros asked Maria with a feigned smile and Maria shrugged her shoulder, signifying that she doesn’t know either before she unlocked her door.
Kyros followed behind her with grocery bags in his hands. He dropped them in the kitchen and he walked to the living room where Maria was sitting.
He had noticed her countenance since they were driving back. She hadn’t been laughing nor wearing a pleasing look. Most times, he had thought he saw her masking her face with a scared look on her face which caused his heart to beat faster than the usual rate.
He sat with her with and handed her a cup of water.
“Are you okay, baby?” he asked and as he was about to rest his hand on her thighs, she shrugged with fear evident on her face.
“I’m sorry. I was just out of space,” she answered with a fake smile.
They have been good in the past months they had spent together. Even though she had refused him sex, he still felt love deeper than the ocean for her but seeing her act this way since two weeks ago was tearing him apart.
“Have I done anything wrong? Tell me what I’ve done, baby and I promise to amend,”
He searched through every corner of his head for flops or faults but there were none on his part. He had been a good boyfriend to her and do jas she been to him. They were having a great thing going on and he had no account of him fucking such a great thing up.
“You didn’t do anything,” she answered with a smile, holding on to her cup like she needed life support from it as she stared far away into space.
He turned her face to look at him still wearing a smile on his exhausted face. “Look at me, Maria. Tell me everything you need to tell me. Tell me exactly how it is in your mind. Speak to me. Let me not be worried,” he sounded sincere but Maria wasn’t feeling the sincerity in his tone.
“Let’s break up!” she threw the words at him without minding its effect.
“What?” he asked. He was too shocked to comprehend her words.
“Let’s fucking end this shit. I’m done with you!” she yelled as she stood to walk away.
“Why?” he managed to ask.
“You are a goddamn murderer!” she tells to his face angrily.