“Hey trouble,” I whisper, my hand clutching tightly onto his. I watch as his eyes slowly flicker open, adjusting to the brightness of the room.
“Bella? Oh, thank god.” Brody whispers hoarsely. I can feel my eyes fill up with pools of tears so I sniffle and turn my back on him. I walk over and pour him a glass of water, blinking back tears. I didn’t think I’d ever hear him say my name again. I didn’t think I’d ever look into his eyes again.
“Bella.”
“Shh, it’s okay Brody. Don’t talk,” I murmur, handing him the glass. He takes it from me shakily, lifting it up to his lips. Once he’s done, I take it from him and place it beside me. He lifts his arm up, signalling for my hand. I immediately clutch onto him, our fingers intertwined tightly.
“You’re here,” he croaks out and I nod my head, giving him a small smile.
“Of course I’m here. I’ve been here the entire time.” I reply softly. His lips stretch out into a small smile, eyes briefly fluttering closed.
“I can’t believe my mothers here,” Brody grimaces causing me to laugh. I play with the soft hairs on his arm, running my fingers up and down it.
“I don’t think your mum likes me much.”
“It’s okay Bella, my mum doesn’t like anyone.” Brody says, squeezing my hand. It’s not a tight squeeze, just a little pressure. It reminds me of how weak he is and I can feel myself breaking down once again. I remain silent, my eyes trained on a spot on the floor so I don’t burst into tears in front of him.
“I’m going to be okay Bella, aren’t I?” He asks me vulnerably, his voice trembling. I look up at his beautiful face, my hand reaching out to push his dark strands of hair back. Several cuts and bruises stain his skin but he still manages to take my breath away. My heart slowly breaks from the pain in his eyes, I’ve never seen him look so scared. He was always the confident one, laid back and calm.
“You’re going to be completely fine Brody. I p-promise.” I whisper, my words a struggle to pronounce. He searches my eyes, sadness filling his.
“You stuttered. . . why did you stutter?”
My eyes drop to the floor and I inhale deeply, not wanting to be the one to give him the news. I feel slightly mad at his parents for not telling him and leaving it down to me.
“I can go get your d-doctor if you want me to,” I say quietly, pushing myself up off the bed. His hand shoots out, wrapping around my wrist.
“Bella, no. Tell me.”
“I don’t want to Brody, I don’t want to be the one to tell you,” I whisper, my voice cracking.
“What is it? Tell me,” he says firmly, his eyes desperately searching mine for an answer. I clutch onto his hand tightly, my breathing hitching in my throat.
“You’re going to have to learn to walk again Brody,” I reveal. I watch as his face crumples up with confusionmixed with fear and anger. In that moment, all I want is to wrap him up in my arms and tell him everything is going to be okay. Just like he did with me over and over again.
“What? Why? My legs are fine,” he protests, shaking his head repeatedly. He struggles to rip the blanket off him and I shake my head, taking hold of his hand to stop him.
“Stop, stop it Brody! It’s not confirmed yet how severe it is. The doctors said something about waiting to see what you’re like once the wires and tubes come off you.” I explain quickly, racking my brain to try and remember the doctors exact words.
“I’m not paralysed Bella!” Brody says, his tone of voice rising slightly. His eyes widen in fear and he looks down at where his legs are —
“Am I paralysed?” He suddenly whispers, his breathing shaking.
“No, not fully. The other car crashed into the front of yours and it damaged the nerves or something in your leg.” I reply, struggling to word my sentences properly. The doctors words were all one big blur and I knew I should have got the doctor to explain it to him.
“W-Why didn’t your Mum or Dad tell you this?” I whisper, dropping down into the chair beside him. My body slumps with exhaustion and beside me, Brody grows silent. I still have hold of his hand and I squeeze it gently, careful not to snag the tubes attached to him.
“I’m so sorry,” I murmur. I suck in a breath before continuing —
“I’m going to be here every step of the way Brody. I care about you so much and whatever happens, I’ll be by your side. I promise you.” I tell him firmly, willing him to look at me. When he does, his beautiful eyes are filled with glossy tears.
“I’m right here. I won’t leave you,” I smile, tears wetting my cheeks. He slowly lifts his hands, brushing the tears away with his fingers. I close my eyes and enjoy the warmth and safety his touch has to offer.
“I’m so happy you’re alive.” I mumble.
He murmurs in agreement, looking distant with his thoughts. I know everything is difficult for him to register so I simply remain silent, providing company for him if he wanted it.
*****
“Bella, you should go home and rest. Would you like me to call your brother?” Brody’s Dad says softly, placing a hand on my shoulder. It’s hours later and Brody eventually drifted away into a heavy state of unconsciousness from the medication. His hand is loosely wrapped in mine and I didn’t dare move an inch. I let out a small sigh, my body exhausted and sore.
“I’ll go home and get some rest but I’ll be back in the morning. Please call me if anything changes,” I murmur, handing him a note with my number scribbled across it. I’m still slightly frustrated that Brody’s parents didn’t tell him about his legs and the possible need for months of physiotherapy.
“Thank you Bella, for being here.”
I nod slowly, running a hand over my tired face.
“No problem. I love your son.” I mumble, my cheeks heating up. I drop my eyes to the floor and Brody’s dad places a hand on my shoulder, giving it a squeeze.
“He loves you Bella. You’re the first person he asked for when he woke up. I’m sorry about his mother, she can be difficult to crack.” His tone is sincere, apologetic. I give him a small smile in response, glancing over at Brody’s mum who has her back to us, staring out of the hospital room window.
“It’s understandable. I’ll see you tomorrow,” I say politely before walking over to Brody. I run my hands over his hair, smiling down at him.
“I love you,” I whisper, placing a kiss on his forehead. A small part of me wants him to wake up and say it back but I know he’s too far gone. He hasn’t moved a single inch since falling asleep, the medication completely taking
over. I take one last look at him, my body and mind overwhelmed with sadness and relief. Relief that even though he was injured, at least he’s alive.
As I leave the hospital, I breathe in deeply, glancing up at the night sky. It’s completely dark, littered with stars here and there. A ghost of a smile flickers across my face and I feel comfort from the stars and their light. There’s one in particular that shines brighter than the rest and I sit down on a bench, hugging my knees into my chest.
Until Jedd comes to pick me up, I continue to stare at that star, unable to tear my eyes off it.