When the elevator stopped in the basement, Evelyn felt like a fool for assuming too many things. Maybe because the things she had read in Pam’s article had stuck in her head. Why had she even thought he would try to explain his actions? Or maybe tell more lies to try to get her back?
She’d been so confident he would do that that she’d been thrown off track when he hadn’t. And then all the things she had wanted to ask had escaped her mind. Now she still didn’t know if her parents’ house was really a done deal or she would have to move them again.
And if she was honest with herself, she was gutted that he hadn’t even tried. She’d expected something that would have at least allowed her some closure.
What did he mean by saying he never deserved her? The way he had said it as if it had been a painful admission, had made something flutter inside her. Her heart immediately wanted to believe that he was sorry but in her head, she knew he had probably realised that he would be better off putting the whole ordeal behind him. Maybe even starting afresh with someone else.
“Miss Bright.”
She wrapped her coat tighter against herself and walked over to Phillip who was leaning against one of Roman’s cars.
“Hi.”
“I’m sorry I was late,” Phillip said. “I hope I didn’t inconvenience you too much.”
“It’s fine.”
But was it? She hadn’t thought the hole in her heart could get any bigger but it felt like it would never heal now.
“So did you… Did you two talk?”
The way he said it was as if he had expected them to. Had that been the reason for his delay?
“There was nothing to talk about.”
Phillip looked at her for a moment before he swore under his breath and pushed himself off the car.
“Where are you staying? I’ll go and drop you off.”
“No, it’s okay. I’m going to call a taxi, and I’m going for a drink first,” she said.
“Unless you have somewhere to hide two number plates under that dress, I think I should take you where you’re staying tonight first.”
She hadn’t thought of that. She looked at her dress and then the small handbag over her shoulder and sighed.
“Okay. Thank you,” she said.
Phillip opened the passenger side door, to her surprise. She had expected to sit in the back where she could wallow in her thoughts a little longer.
“Where to?”
She gave him the address of the Bed and Breakfast she had booked on a discount site. Though she had agreed to keep Roman’s money, it was likely going to remain untouched until she could think about him without all the pain.
“He’s not a bad guy, you know,” Phillip said quietly once they had joined the traffic. “A little bit misguided, but not bad.”
“He’s more than a little bit misguided.”
“He’s been through some things with his family that have messed him up. Maybe if you_”
“Don’t ask me to talk to him,”
She was the wronged one here, Phillip would be crazy to even suggest that. Besides that, Roman had had weeks to talk to her if he’d really wanted to. Not that she would have listened, but he could have tried.
“You’re right. I’m sorry,” Phillip said. “And I wasn’t trying to excuse his behaviour.”
They drove in silence the rest of the way, and once he stopped in the car park of the B&B, he turned to face her.
“I know it’s not my place to say anything, but you still love him, Evelyn. If you_”
“Please,” she cut in. “Can I just have my number plates?”
Her feelings didn’t matter if they weren’t reciprocated. Phillip sighed and got out of the car to open the boot. She followed and waited for him to hand her the bag that contained her number plates. At least this was done now and she could get on with trying to forget about Roman.
The icy air cut into her and made her want to go in and curl up in bed but she knew she wouldn’t sleep tonight. Not after seeing Roman. Going out was the only option.
“I’ll wait here and take you where you want to go,” Phillip offered.
“Aren’t you supposed to head back to Roman’s?”
“No. All he wants to do these days is stay home and work. I’ll take you, it’s no problem.”
Stay home and work? So he hadn’t built up a harem of other women?
She pushed that thought aside and considered Phillip’s offer. It would be nice to stay in his warm car and get dropped right outside the club.
“Okay, thank you.”
It took her only five minutes and then she was back in his car, heading towards the city centre in silence. They stopped outside the fancy club that Brendan had brought her to the last time she had seen him. She had no idea why she had chosen this place again since the last time she had been here was when everything had gone wrong with Roman.
“Call me if you need a ride home,” Phillip said, handing her a card.
“I’ll be okay. Thank you, though.”
“Keep it,” Phillip insisted. “If you’re out alone you might need it. Unless you’re meeting someone?”
“No, I’m just going to have a couple of drinks and then go back. I’ll be fine, honestly.”
Phillip just nodded but didn’t take the card back. She thanked him and then got out of the car.
Because it was so cold and most people would prefer to stay home and keep warm, there wasn’t a queue to go in like last time. The atmosphere seemed more intimate, especially since the DJ was currently playing a slow song and a few couples were locked in each other’s arms on the dancefloor.
She tried not to look at them as she went straight to the bar but once she was seated and sipping on a vodka cocktail, she couldn’t help herself. The couples looked happy and in love. There probably wasn’t a single ridiculous contract between them. They looked like normal couples who were not afraid to show their affection.
Like Roman had done when he had even paraded her in front of his family as if she meant something. And he hadn’t actually gone there to introduce her, he’d just wanted to check on his father.
She turned away from the couples and finished her drink in one go as she ordered another one. It had been stupid to come to London. Roman didn’t need the car she had returned, she could have waited. But she knew there would never be a good time to see Roman again. It would always hurt. Maybe it was a good thing that he had said his goodbyes now.
She didn’t know how long she sat at the bar staring into her drink. Either the DJ was very lazy or one of those couples had requested all the slow songs, but she was feeling more depressed by the second. This clearly hadn’t been the place to come to help her with that.
She would have one more drink and then call a taxi. Things would look brighter in the morning. They had to. She didn’t know how long she could live like this.
“Is this seat taken?”
Her body tensed at the sound of that voice.