The next morning, I had my priorities laid out. I was going to avoid Ethan as much as possible because it seemed that he wasn’t going to make any effort to kill whatever it was between us. I would hang out with Keith but those were going to be limited as I had my suspicions about him and if it was true I didn’t want to lead him on.
I was going to concentrate on my studies, exercise and eat healthily. It was just to fill up my day so that if I kept myself busy, I wouldn’t have to worry about unwanted interactions with either of the two guys in my life right now.
And I was going to spend time with people around me because I didn’t know just how much time I had among them. Just like the day I was kidnapped,? there would be a day where my world would be completely turned upside down again and I didn’t want to have any regrets about not getting to know these great people who not everyone had the chance to know. I was going to make the most of it without complicating things with certain people.
The next day when I saw Keith I was happy to know that he had seen my present first and was wearing the watch I gave him. He also told me he loved it.
We still met up for my cooking lessons as I figured that much was necessary and would be harmless.
Time flew by quickly. I was busy most of the time with my course work and projects. It was the starting of a new semester and already I was finding difficulties with my studies. It was easy when I was in college as I could just clarify things with the professors and although here I could still get things cleared from my professors by electronic means but it wasn’t the same.
Books for the new semester were supplied by Heather who delivered it to the mansion in boxes labeled dresses and makeup as gifts from her in case someone had doubts about the mysterious packages.
Days would pass by quicker than before. I was starting to feel lonely. I was aware of the fact that Olivia and I had drifted apart.
This was confirmed when I saw her and Heather discussing something secretively while coming out of her room, one week after the little party I threw. This was strange considering Olivia wasn’t too fond of Heather as she thought she was a little cold and unfriendly.
“Hi, what’s up with you two?” I asked.
Their faces looked alarmed. “Nothing. What’re you doing here?” Olivia asked. She was acting suspicious.
“I was actually on my way to visit Tristan. It had been such a long time since I saw him. I had my exams so it has been almost two months. But then I saw you two and you were talking about something and thought I’d ask you guys what it was about.”
“It’s nothing. We were just chatting a little about Olivia’s future plans and what she wants to be and stuff like that.” Heather answered this time. She talked like how she normally did so I wasn’t sure if she was lying or not. Then again, she was a good liar. She could lie about the biggest of things with a straight face and directly look into your eyes while doing so which would leave you with no other option but to believe her.
“Okay.”
If it weren’t for Olivia’s anxious stare, I would’ve actually bought it. That was how I knew there was something wrong and only Heather and Olivia knew about it and didn’t want to let me know.
***
“Tristan!” I squealed as I caught sight of him with his horses. I ran up to him and pulled him in a hug.
Yes, Tristan loved horses and he was pretty good at riding one, or at least that was what he told me. I remembered his conversation with Ethan the first day I met him and how he beat him to a horse race.
“Juliet, hey,” he said, sounding happy about seeing me which made me pleased.
“What have you been up to lately? Why did you not visit me this past month or two?”
“I was just busy with work.” He shrugged.
“I feel like I’ve heard that sentence too many times in the last month.” I groaned, remembering all those times Ethan told me that exact thing.
“What?”
“Nothing, so you had time to go horse riding but not to meet me?” I accused.
“Hey, horses are my first love. I’d never ditch them for anyone, sorry.”
“And Olivia is your second?”
“No. The girl I was with, who was only with me for money. That girl was my second love.”
“So Olivia is your third?”
“Was.” He whispered and I almost didn’t catch it.
This surprised me because I didn’t think he would get over her this quick.
“Why? Don’t you like her now? Did something happen between you two?”
Tristan caressed one of his horses. “I don’t even know anymore. There was this time when I thought she liked me back but then something happened and she doesn’t want to see my face again. So I thought I was just imposing on her, forcing her to like me back. So I told myself to stop liking her and to stop bothering her and I’m still in the process of getting over her.” He said sadly.
“Wait, what happened between you two?”
“I don’t want to answer that.” He said, turning away from me to another horse.
“That’s not fair. I feel like Olivia is keeping secrets from me and now you too. I don’t like it. Don’t you guys trust me?” I whined.
“It’s not like that. Let’s just say that we both are as confused as to what happened between us as you are.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Did you come here to argue with me over something that doesn’t even concern you?”
I pouted. “One day I will find out.”
“Okay you little nosy parker. Now do you want to ride some horses?”
“Not if they’ll just make me fall. These are beautiful horses though.” I said as I stroked a black one among a dozen that Tristan owned. “Does Amelia know how to ride one?”
“Of course I do.” Said Amelia as she appeared with Ethan in tow.
“What are you doing here?” I asked to no one in particular but Ethan and I knew that the question was mainly directed at him.
“What do you think?” He retorted with a smile.
“I’m here to ride horses, and show everyone just how good I’m at it. As for Ethan, I don’t know. He just suddenly turned up unexpectedly.” Amelia narrowed her eyes suspiciously at him.
Tristan groaned from behind me. “More people, great.” He grumbled.
“So let’s ride the horses. Maybe have a little race, yeah?” Amelia asked, already walking towards a chestnut brown horse. “This is Amy, my horse,” Amelia told me, stroking its nose.
“She’s beautiful,” I said.
“So on my way here, I heard that you don’t know how to ride a horse. I can teach you.” Ethan offered.
“Thanks but I’m fine. I don’t want to ride one.” I declined.
That was, sort of, a lie. Honestly, I was a little eager to learn to ride a horse but I didn’t want to because of Ethan. I didn’t know why he was even talking to me. I thought we had wordlessly mutually decided to not interact. What part of all the signs I was giving him did he not understand?
There were benches next to the stables that I made my way towards as Amelia and Tristan got on their respective horses. I caught sight of Ethan going somewhere, making me relieved because I didn’t want to be near him.
Over the week, I discovered my incessant? need? to see him, even from a distance. It intensified whenever the duration of me not seeing him exceeded six hours. I knew that having no communication with him over seven days had only made me want to talk to him. Over these seven days, I had barely seen Ethan and it annoyed me that just the mere sight of him today made my heart ecstatic.
I told myself a lot of times that I had to get a grip on my feelings, that I couldn’t allow anything to happen between us. But the bad news was that my resistance was weakening day by day and I couldn’t do anything about it. I knew what I was starting to allow was wrong. I should stop. But it felt like it wasn’t even in my control anymore.
I could feel my self control weakening. And I feared that if he made any more proclamation of his feelings towards me, I’d give into him. I hated feeling so weak.
I didn’t realize I was staring into the distance and lost in my thoughts until fingers snapped in front of me.
I looked up to see Ethan with two cans of soda. He sat next to me and placed a can in my hands.
“Thanks,” I said, getting up to go elsewhere because God knows how much space I needed to put between us for it to be safe.
“Stay, please.” He said in a quiet voice and I almost didn’t catch his words.
“I need to see if Amelia needs anything,” I replied. It was a stupid excuse but I didn’t know what to say.
He sighed. “We both know it’s an excuse. I don’t want much. I just want to sit next to you for a few minutes. Please.”
I felt conflicted. My brain was telling me to walk away without sparing him another glance and my heart was telling me the opposite.
In a matter of seconds, I made my? decision.