You are Clearly Insane
XANDRY
I was wholly unprepared for the sharp stab of the pain at the left side of my chest. I hadn’t seen and talked to her for over two weeks and it opened up the fresh waves of longing and searing pain when she broke up with me. Over. The. Fucking. Phone.
I lost her.
Let’s end this. These three words repeatedly electrocuted my brain. I took another sip of the scotch Forrest filled me. I ignored his cold and stoic looked and gestured him to pour me another shot, and he didn’t hesitate. And that confirmed my suspicion that this guy hated my guts. For whatever reason, I didn’t have any idea.
“Hmm, if it’s not my dear cousin,” Pyke sang, took a seat beside me, and Forrest quickly placed down a cold beer for him.
“I’m not in a mood for chit-chat, Pyke. I came here as a customer and not a cousin, so, fuck off.” I gulped the last shot of the scotch, willingly took in the burn into my throat, hoping to numb my brain and my broken heart.
Two weeks ago when I left, I kept my things at her home with the thought of going back sooner because I was sure that I was falling for Blaine. She stole my heart—no, I willingly offered it to her. Then, I just broke my promise. I screwed up big time.
My dear old man threatened my good damn trust fund and my job, and he was willing to pull out his connection so that I couldn’t be able to find a job if I would go and see her again. I thought I was able to convince myself that I was a responsible man when I wholeheartedly took the responsibility for my child, but I was terribly wrong.
I had savings in my account, but not enough to last for years now that I was going to be a father. Sunshine had nothing left, and she couldn’t work with a condition like that. She needed me, a roof to stay. We needed money for our bills, for her appointment and medicines.
“Congratulations, Xandry! I can’t believe you’ll be the first to be a dad before everyone. But I am proud of you.” Pyke patted my back, and I knew he was genuine, but I was not in a mood to have a heart-to-heart or pep talk right now.
Don’t get me wrong, I never regretted taking the responsibility. I was just heartbroken for the first fucking time and it was awfully painful and driving me insane.
“Thanks, and I got to go.” I stood up, patted his back, and walked away without bother looking at Pyke again.
I needed to get home before I got drunk to oblivion.
***
My coffee suddenly tasted like shit when Blaine’s words slapped me hard on my face.
“You don’t have to come with me, Xandry.” Sunshine’s soft voice made me look up at her.
She had been here for over two weeks, and I couldn’t believe it was even possible for me to have a roommate. I gave her credit for not invading my privacy. She stayed in her room when I was at home. We barely saw each other if I didn’t have to check on her if she was okay. She was true to her words not to bother me, and I was so damn thankful for that.
I cleared my throat to lessen the awkwardness surrounding us and assured her, “I said I’m coming and we’re on this together, okay?”
She maybe woke up long before I did because she finished her breakfast and already took her vitamins, the bottles were already on the top of the counter. She was already wearing a pink maternity dress Mom had shopped for her.
“Then at least groom yourself, Xandry.” She pouted, wrinkling her nose as she raked her eyes all over me.
I scratched my growing scruff. “Leave me alone, Shine. I’ll do if it will affect the baby, but if it won’t then let it be it.”
“I-I’m—”
I raised my hand. I knew she was going to apologize for the nth times.
Standing up, I poured the coffee into the sink. I couldn’t drink it anymore. My stomach churned, wondering if Blaine was sulking like me. Did she even think of me? How was Ben doing?
Damnation! I’m going insane. I needed to put myself together for the sake of my baby girl.
“Let’s go. Do you have anything you need?” I asked Shine whose again keeping her distance and biting her lip.
“That’s not good for the baby, Sunshine. I feel like you regretted telling me.” I took her bag from her.
I didn’t have feelings for her like how I felt for Blaine, but I did care for her because she was the mother of my child, a friend, and she was so fragile and alone. Somehow, I could see Blaine in her, but Blaine was luckier than Sunshine—she had family and friends at a time like this.
My sister didn’t like her at all. She never showed her ass up here, even to check on me other than her last text ‘Everything will be okay, brother dear’ and it was filled with sarcasm, I must say.
***
The doctor, Mom’s suggested was older than I expected. Dr. Higgins was in her late fifties, she was well-experienced for a case like Sunshine had. Thankfully, the lab results were better than the last time Sunshine did. Mom checked up her diet strictly and had her own low salt food at home. Her weight decreased as well and her limbs were less swollen.
My heart thudded when I started looking at the monitor and wasn’t aware of what should I expect to see.
My mouth hung open to see the small baby with a big head as the sonographer moved the thingy over Sunshine’s growing belly. My baby was really moving, her heartbeat was fast and strong. She pointed to the monitor with measurements of the baby limbs and the head circumference and was around twelve inches long and weigh a pound.
I was beyond overwhelmed and relieved at the same time and Sunshine saw my reaction and rolled her eyes at me. I frowned.
My baby was already twenty-three weeks old.
“This is better than I expected, Ms. Price. I suggested you continue your maintenance and diet,” Dr. Higgins stated after Sunshine did her ultrasound, and Sunshine gratefully thanked her.
“You’re welcome, dear. Your next appointment will be next month, but if you feel anything different even the slightest, you call us immediately.”
I went back with Sunshine to my apartment. My work was overloaded in my office. Dad didn’t consider my excuse even he knew I had to be with her for her appointment, I guessed this was the way of his retribution for accidentally knocking up someone.
I scratched the back of my head when I looked down at the last spreadsheet on my desk. My eyes burned, my neck stiffed, my ass was hot for sitting so long, and my stomach just grumbled. Fucking right. Work helped me for keeping my brain busy from not thinking of Blaine, but didn’t lessen the hurt inside my chest. It still ached like hell, feeling hollow that something was missing.
“Fuck!” As I glanced down at my wristwatch. It was five in the afternoon. No wonder my stomach grumbled because it was almost dinner, and I just missed my lunch.
The good thing was I worked in my study at my apartment and the kitchen was just a few steps away. It was quite a relief.
A smile curved from my lips when I heard a muffled voice of Saph in the kitchen.
I know you can’t stand long not seeing me, twinnie.
“You shouldn’t be here in the first place. I know you planned on all of these because you know my brother is rich.” Saph’s sharp voice made me stop to a halt. What did she just say?
My jaw clenched. I knew she didn’t like Sunshine, but she didn’t have to be mean to her. I couldn’t believe she wasn’t on my side.
“I don’t want to be here, Saph—”
“Oh, for the love of God, don’t Saph me,” Saph cut her off with a distasteful tone, “we are not friends and never will be. If you think you let my brother knock you up you can now get closed to the treasure and have something from my family, you’re wrong. You will have nothing, ended up on the street after you deliver that child.”
“I don’t want anything from your family, M-Ms. Williams, I swear to God,” Sunshine responded with a shaky voice as her chin trembled.
“Then get out of this apartment, you don’t belong here! My brother is in love with someone and for Pete’s sake has some self-preservation. You just broke them up. You broke my brother’s heart because of your goddamn baby!”
I couldn’t believe this. I couldn’t believe her. I shook my head in annoyance and in disbelief.
“I’m leaving,” Sunshine whispered, tears were already behind her eyelids.
“No, you’re not!” I walked closer to them, and they both startled with my voice, clearly not expecting my presence.
Sunshine wiped her tears, cowering herself with her arms wrapped around her body while my sister was standing tall with her arms crossed over her chest like a predator, and owned this fucking apartment. She was maybe my sister, but I didn’t give her the right to insult the mother of my child.
Heat flushed through my body. My muscles quivered and I glared at her. “What do you think are you doing, Saphoera?”
“You heard us, so why are you asking?” she asked sarcastically, remained in her place, unmoving while Sunshine was sobbing and cowering at my back.
“I was happy to hear your voice earlier. I thought you came here to see me and congratulate me on being a dad, but I was wrong, instead, you just insulted the mother of my child, and the last time I checked I didn’t give you the right to do that, sister. If you can’t accept her or me being a dad or yourself to be a future aunt then you are not welcome to come here anymore.”
Saph eyes widened and her mouth gaped, truly not expecting to hear that from me, but I had a lot of bullshit to even welcome her nuisance insults over Sunshine.
She swallowed. “I can’t believe you choose her over me, Xandry. I never expected you to be this low because of her.” Pointing at my back.
My nose flared. “Don’t, Saphoera.” I took a deep breath to control my rage. “If you still love me and value me as your twin, please leave now. You already disrespect her and my decisions. I think that’s enough. You crossed the line and you know for fuck’s sake she’s sick and she’s not allowed to be under stress.”
“Well, you are clearly insane. I helped you out solving your problem, but you chose her over Blaine—”
“Wait, what?” My blood rushed through my brain like a hurricane. My hand was already on her arm gripping her as she started to leave.
“Oh, she didn’t tell you, did she?” she asked sarcastically, jerking her arm off from my grip.
“I-I made a promise not to tell him.”