The worst thing a man can see is when the person he loves is crying. Sometimes there is absolutely nothing you can do but give a solid shoulder to cry on. I have never been one that knew how to comfort. I always use to shy away from showing any affection. Somewhat cold and somewhat insensitive.
But meeting Ava ~ has all changed that. I have learned how to comfort her and to take her tears away. Even though it scares me shitless, I have stayed next to her and help her seethe way through. She is crying again, she is mumbling through a bunch of sobs and I don’t understand a word.
Trayton ~”Baby girl what is wrong?”
Ava ~”Baby I am so sorry.”
Trayton ~”Baby girl why are you sorry?”
Ava ~”Baby I am really sorry.”
Trayton ~”What is wrong? Why are you sorry?”
She bursts out crying again. Another thing I have had to learn with her is patience. Not that it comes easy to a man that was used to get what he wants.
Trayton ~”Baby girl tell me what is wrong?”
Ava ~”Baby I…”
Two words further than before. No disrespect to her but this might take a while.
Trayton ~”Ava I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what is wrong.”
Ava ~”I think I might…”
And she goes again, if I knew it was going to take so long, I would have brought a beer with me. Maybe not really but I could have almost by the rate this is going.
Trayton ~”Ava what do you think you might? Has something happened? What have you done?”
Ava ~”What makes you think I have done something wrong?”
Trayton ~”You are making it sound that way baby.”
Ava ~”Well this is kind of both our faults.”
Trayton ~”What do you mean?”
Ava ~”I think I am pregnant.”
Trayton ~”What!”
That is one of the words that almost every single man do not want to hear. I am really not single but it still is the last word I want to hear.
Trayton ~”You are shitting me? Tell me you are fucking with me?”
Ava ~”I am not definitely sure but I am almost completely sure.”
Trayton ~”What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
Ava ~”I need to do a test but I am sure.”
Trayton ~”How the fuck can you be sure if you have not done a test?”
Ava ~”I just know.”
Trayton ~”I don’t think it is possible just to know without taking a test.”
Ava ~”Then get me a test.”
Trayton ~”Try asking please. And how is it even possible if you have been taking the pill?”
Ava ~”I forgot to take it.”
Trayton ~”How the fuck do you forget to take it?”
Ava ~”With everything that has been going on I forgot.”
Trayton ~”Do you forget to brush your teeth?”
Ava ~”No.”
Trayton ~”The fucking tablets are next to your toothbrush.”
Ava ~”Baby I am sorry.”
Trayton ~”I will go get you a test.”
On the way down the hallway, I bump into my mom who is smiling damn too much for my liking
Mary ~”Is it not great Trayton?
Trayton ~”I am glad you think so.”
Mary ~”What do you mean?”
Trayton ~”I did not plan for this, I did not even ever see for this to happen. I mean how can she be so reckless? She can barely look after herself.”
Mary ~”Don’t you think that is a bit mean?”
Trayton ~”No mom I don’t. Ava is still too young both physically and mentally to have a child.”
Mary ~”Trayton that is enough. That is the woman you marrying that you talking about.”
Trayton ~”Leave it mom. Let me go get this fucking test.”
I take my coat and head out into the cold morning air, it not doing much for the heat burning under my skin. This is not the good kind of heat but the way I am so mad I am going to punch something kind of heat. I am so mad at her, she promised she was taking her pills and that she would tell me if she skipped. This is not what we planned, we not ready, fuck we can’t even get so far as to set a wedding date.
I grab a test, make it five, from the pharmacy and head back home. All I need is for damn Emma to see this and the entire house knows. I bump into Kenton in the kitchen when I get back home.
Kenton ~”Trayton what is wrong?”
I show him the tests.
Kenton ~”Oh fuck. I am guessing this was not planned.”
Trayton ~”You damn right it was not planned.”
I head back upstairs where a crying Ava and my mom are waiting for me. I hand her the tests and make her take all five of them.
An hour later she comes out the bathroom with all five in her hand.
Trayton ~”Are you sure?”
Ava ~’I’d say after the second one I am pretty damn sure.”
Trayton ~”So you are pregnant?”
Ava ~”Yes Trayton, I am pregnant.”
Trayton ~”I will be downstairs, I don’t know how to deal with this.”
She bursts out crying. Any other day I will run and hug her but not now, not today.
Trayton ~”I need to think about this.”
Ava ~”It is not going to go away.”
Trayton ~”I know Ava, believe me I know.”
Ava ~”Why are you mad at me?”
Trayton ~”Maybe because you have not been drinking your pill. How is it even possible if you only been skipping it now?”
Ava ~”I stopped drinking it in the hospital.”
Trayton ~”What? When?”
Ava ~”Must have been the first time after we got back?”
Trayton ~”That night you left our damn clothes laying around? Seems it was not only our clothes you chose to fucking forget that night.”
Ava ~”What is that supposed to mean?”
Trayton ~”Just leave me alone until I figure this out for myself. You are very selfish. You run around acting like everybody owes you something. I am so done with the way you treat me! And now this! Don’t you think?”
Ava ~”Baby please.”
Trayton ~”Do not fucking call me baby.”
I burst out the room past my mom and head downstairs. On the way to the lounge I stop to grab a beer and a glass for whiskey. I sit down next to Kenton and give him a beer too.
Kenton ~”All five of them?”
Trayton ~”Every fucking single one.”
Kenton ~”Shit Trayton.”
Trayton ~”Shit is not even the right word.”
Emma ~”Don’t you guys think it is too early to be drinking that.”
Kenton ~”Babe Trayton is having a bad morning, it is making him relax.”
Emma ~”In that case, I will grab one too.”
Emma jumps up to go grab a beer from the kitchen.
Trayton ~”Fuck just make sure she is on the pill and taking the damn stuff too.”
Kenton ~”Trust me I will shove it down her throat if I have to.”
Trayton ~”There was a time the only thing I wanted down a girl’s throat was my cock.”
Kenton ~”Seems like you got more than you bargained for. What you going to do?”
Trayton ~”I am so damn mad at her.”
Kenton ~”It takes two though.”
Trayton ~”I know but the one of us should be drinking her pill and not lie about it. If she told me then I would have made sure that I use protection.”
Kenton ~”So it seems your damn ass is going to be a father now.”
Trayton ~”Do not start with that.”
I know that she needs me right now but right now I cannot look past the biggest thing she has lied to me about to date. The angry side of me are making me think she did it on purpose.
Emma ~”Did I hear you say father?”
Trayton ~”You going to find out anyway. Ava is pregnant.”
Emma ~”Is that why you so mad?”
Trayton ~”What gave that away?”
Emma ~”Maybe that second whiskey. That’s nearly done.”
Trayton ~”She just kind of sprung on me that she have not been taking her pill.”
Emma ~”Ouch. That is really dumb.”
Trayton ~”At least someone agrees with me.”
Emma ~”So when is the wedding now?”
Trayton ~”There will be no fucking wedding.”
Emma ~”Why? I don’t understand?”
Trayton ~”I am not marrying her just because she is pregnant now.”
Emma ~”Where is she?”
Trayton ~”Upstairs with mom.”
Emma leaves to go check on Ava. Dominic decides to break away from the job to have a whiskey with us.
Dominic ~”I really could not help to hear the word pregnant.”
Trayton ~”I know it kind of stands out like a blonde with orange hair.”
Dominic ~”Fuck man are you seriously becoming a dad?”
Trayton ~”Well five tests are definitely making it appear so.”
Dominic ~”You do know that twins run in her family?”
Trayton ~”Fuck off, you are joking?”
Dominic ~”No man, they definitely do.”
Trayton ~”Thanks for fucking up the rest of my day too.”
Half an hour later I am upstairs getting changed to go to the club. She is still in bed, if she is not sleeping, she is crying. I do not understand why she is crying. She knew something would happen if she was not taking her pill. I can’t sit with her and pretend that I am not cross. I don’t know how to do this but I will figure it out. I am not running away from my responsibility and my child. Ava ~ I am not so sure about, she lied and I am not taking this so lightly.
Trayton ~”I will be at the club.”
Ava ~”Are you not going to say anything?”
Trayton ~”I said what I had to. I don’t know how to do this but I will figure it all out as it happens. I am going to be a father and that is all I am focussing on.”
Ava ~”What about us?”
Trayton ~”That I honestly don’t know about now but one thing is for sure, I am not marrying you just because you pregnant.”
She bursts out crying again and I leave the room. Downstairs everyone including Emma is waiting for me to leave to the club. Oddly I would think that Emma ~ will stay with Ava but it seems not today.
On the way to the club, everyone is making fun of me becoming a dad. It is pointless getting mad at the fact that I am going to be a dad. It sounds very weird putting Trayton DeCarlo and dad in the same sentence but it is something that I can get used to but Ava, I will rather just not say a word.
Much to my disgust when we walk in I see Jacklyn is still working at the bar. She smiles as we walk past.
Trayton ~”What is she doing here still?”
Kenton ~”It’s actually because of her that we found you.”
Trayton ~”Really? How so?”
Kenton ~”She heard Alexa asking questions around here. Maybe just say thank you before you fire her.”
After much consideration I decide to walk on over to her. I would be a real shallow person if I do not at least acknowledge her part in finding me.
Trayton ~”Jacklyn.”
Jacklyn ~”Trayton, I am so glad to see you are back and you are okay.”
Trayton ~”Kenton said you played a big part of it.”
Jacklyn ~”Just me lending my ears out again.”
Trayton ~”Well I am glad you did. Thank you.”
Jacklyn ~”Anytime Trayton.”
Trayton ~”I will let you get back to work.”
I turn around and make my way upstairs where the rest of the group are all laughing and fooling around. They still are very much teasing me about becoming a dad. I have stopped being mad at it, reality is setting in more and more at bits of time. I am still very much furious at Ava for having lied to me about it for months.
Emma ~”Hey are you feeling better?”
Trayton ~”I am so pissed off at her. I can’t believe she can be so selfish and careless. Why would she even do such a thing like this in the first place?”
Emma ~”I don’t know Trayton. Some days I wonder if she is the Ava I used to live with. She can be so mean and rude some days.”
Trayton ~”And other’s she seems all loving and caring. Sometimes I feel like I am here to serve her.”
Emma ~”Ouch that is bad. But I know what you mean, she is very demanding and she has to have things her way.”
Trayton ~”Don’t get me wrong, I know I am going to become a dad. And I will make sure I am a good dad. I just wish I had a damn say in it.”
Emma ~”Where do your relationship stand now? I mean it seems like she intentionally did it.”
Trayton ~”For her sake I hope she did not. But right now I can’t stand to be around her. Mom will make sure she is okay.”
Emma ~”Well I am here for you. Now let’s toast a tequila to you becoming a dad.”
Jacklyn who is serving our round nearly drops the tray to the floor.
Jacklyn ~”Did you say dad?”
Trayton ~”Yes it seems like I am going be a dad.”
Jacklyn ~”I guess congratulations it is then. I will send another round on me over.”
Jacklyn seams highly upset and caught off guard by the news. It is probably the last thing she wanted to hear right now. I don’t need bullshit coming from her side too.
Just then my phone buzzes, it is Ava, and I am really not in the mood for an argument now. I decide to ignore her messages that comes in one after the other for the next hour.
The night goes down in a blur. The only constant thought is that I am going to be a dad. It makes me think back to my own father and how much I looked up to him. How much I loved him and how much he cared about me and that loved me too.
And that is as far as it goes, there is absolutely no further thoughts as far as Ava goes. As far as I am concern she is the mother of my child, the woman that lied about taking her pill and then falling pregnant.
When we get home I head upstairs to my room where she is still awake. She greets me but I don’t say a word. I grab a pair of shorts, a pillow and a spare blanket.
Ava ~”Where you going?”
Trayton ~”I am sleeping downstairs.”
Ava ~”But why?”
Trayton ~”I don’t want to be around your lying ass now.”
She bursts out crying while I leave the room. She cannot treat me like she sees fit and get things her way as she pleases.