Of course, after that day, Dylan and I started talking more but then we were never fully comfortable with each other. Most times, we avoided talking about personal issues, probably because we feel like we don’t trust each other or whatever but to me, all that didn’t matter.
Even though I can’t say I had someone to share my pain with, I at least had someone I could talk to and that’s okay. Dylan was a good distraction. He’s annoying, funny and can be off. He takes my mind off things. It feels good to feel something other than pain and burden.
At first, Dylan didn’t seem to care. After the day he called me best friend, he barely looked at me or even talked to me. I was always the person walking up to him to say hi and start a discussion or something. Later on, Dylan got used to my presence, not really used to it but he actually started talking… a lot.
“Don’t barge in you idiot. Learn how to start knocking.”, I groaned, rolling my eyes as soon as I heard my door slam open. I knew it was Dylan without having to see him.
Being around Dylan brought out sides of me that I didn’t know existed. For example, being quiet, tolerate, timid, passive. That was never me. My behavior back then wasn’t mine, it was forced. Most of my smiles, words, reactions, they were all forced.
“Shut up.”, he said, stepping in and running to my bed, jumping on it and landing beside me. “You forgot what it is today.”
“Your birthday?”, I asked, not even sure of his birthday date. I never keep those things in mind. I never really saw them as important.
“No, that was months ago you idiot.”
“My bad.”, clearly not caring.
“A few years back, today, we crowned ourselves best friends.”
“More like you crowned me.”, my response cam me immediately. Back then, we were in junior school. Now we’re in middle.
We’re as imperfect as we can be.
Back in junior school, I was known as the girl Dylan talked to. I hated that name. Most of the people who gathered themselves around me were there for Dylan. Everyone was a wanna be. Chasing clout at such a young age. Everyone knew who I was but didn’t even know my name.
It’s always. ‘Hey… You…’, disgusting.
I started to hate everyone and everything at a point. I felt so pained. I was so tired.
After getting beat at home I’d have to go to school and endure watching stupid people gather themselves around me. I wanted all that to change. I wanted to give myself a name, not get it cause of the people I’m seen with. Junior school was a waste, middle school… That’s when I actually started living. That’s when the real Avery was born, not a puppet.
Warning though, I was stupid and would always be stupid.
Watching everyone in school live their loves happily hurt. They had so much I felt they didn’t deserve. I’d watch them hug their parents and get kisses. I’d watch them disrespect them, make them cry. I watched have a normal life though all of them were crap.
I was jealous.
It wasn’t fair.
I wanted parents too.
I wanted kisses.
Why do they get to live such happy lives while I stay at the back and suffer. Why can’t I change that?
How can I make things a bit more fair?
Oh, I know. Give them what the deserve.?
How do I do that?
Bully a bit.
Yup. That’s what I turned out to be.?
A bully.
My story hasn’t even begun.
As for the psychopath that keeps barging into my room, he’s the idiot that keeps getting in trouble with teachers. Always skipping classes and getting in fights. I can’t count the number of times he’s been in it with the Alpha’s son.
“We crowned ourselves.”, Dylan frowned, rolling his eyes then sighing and relaxing a bit. “Do you really think we’re best friends? Or are we just people who talk?”, he asked, looking at me, trying to read out any change in my facial expression.
I predicted this, the question didn’t catch me off guard. I knew he’d realize we weren’t what people would call best friends.
“What do you think of me? Someone you talk to? Or best friend?”, he asked
“Friend.”, I gave my answer, not bothering to hesitate. I felt he knew the answer already and even if he didn’t, I doubt any answer would actually have an effect on him. He’s never been easy to get to.
“Hmm.”, he sighed, looking away and facing the ceiling, while I turned to look at him, not sure how exactly he was taking it.
“Well… I like being around you.”, he said, not bothering to glance at me. “I always want to talk to you or look at you at least. I always… Want to piss you off or make you laugh… You’re like a stress relief, you know?”
“Are you crushing on me-”
“No. Geez, you didn’t. What’s there to trip for?”, he shot at me, almost facepalming before I could even complete the question.
I starred at him for a few seconds, biting my lower lip in attempt to hold back my laughter but after a few seconds. I gave up and freely laughed, enjoying watching his mood change a bit.?
“I’m not crushing on you. You idiot.”
“Sure. A few seconds ago you were sounding lovestr-”
“No! I was trying to explain that you’re not just a friend to me.”
“I’m a crush too.”, I giggled, winking.
“I give up.” he sighed, sitting up. “You’re a waste.”
“I was just kidding. C’mon.”, I gave a short giggle before sitting up and placing my arm on his shoulder, ignoring noticing that he had stiffened a bit. “So what were you telling me? You see me as your best friend or…”
“Yesss. Is that so hard to process?”
Hearing all this was a surprise to me honestly. As soon as he told me he always wanted to be around me. I kinda freaked out inside. I was thrown off guard for a second but I was able to revive myself seconds later.?
I needed to avoid getting the atmosphere tensed so I cracked those jokes. I think he’d have preferred that too.?
Was I tye only person always feeling some kind of discomfort when we were with each other?
Was that feeling one sided?
“I can understand if you don’t see me as a best friend yet. That’s temporary anyway.”, he shrugged. “We’d soon both see each other as best friends.”
“Why do you think so?”
“Cause we’re a match.”, he smiled, locking eyes with me.
I struggled to hold back my smile. The fact that that’s what he actually wanted felt nice I guess plus it was rare to get him to talk like this, “What’s next? Lovers?”, I joked.
“Who knows.”, he shrugged. “We might even be mates.”, he said, standing up.
“No way.”, I whispered, l nauseated by the thought of Dylan and I being mates.
He chuckled when he saw his quickly my expression changed to disgusted, heading for the door and reaching for the door knob, he glanced at me then said, “I can’t believe I once hated you. Was I crazy?” And with that he left.
Leaving me to stare at the door. Enjoying a lot of feelings at the moment.
I wish we were friends earlier.
Life would have been way more bearable.