“Are you okay?” Ace whispered, rubbing my back soothingly.
I wiped my nose on the back of my hand, sniffing and clinging closer to him. “I think so.”
He raised his hands, picking me up from his lap. Fear gripped him hard. No, no. I needed human contact right now. More like Bryan contact. I needed comfort and someone to make be me feel wanted. And at this point he was exactly what I desired desperately. I encircled my arms around his neck, burying my face deeper into his shoulder.
“Not yet, please.” I whispered weakly. The plea echoed in the tiny confines of car.
His arms dropped and then wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer. His face rubbed against my hair, kissing them lightly. “I am so sorry.” Taking my face in his palms he kissed my ear, “Really sorry.” He kissed my cheek. “I didn’t know this would scare you.” He kissed the right corner of my lips, “I won’t do that again.” He kissed the left corner, “You still look beautiful.” He stared at me.
By now my breaths were coming in short pants, I stared into his dark rich brown eyes falling into its depth and losing myself in them. I gulped and licked my lips unconsciously; his eyes followed the action lustfully. I shifted slightly and gasped as I felt something hard under my thighs, his arousal – he wanted me. And boy, did I want him? Hell yeah. Fuck the consequences!
As if he read my thoughts, in the next blink, his lips were on mine, hard, urgent, fervent, consuming and dominating all my senses. I kissed him back with equal fervor. This is what I needed to forget my past for now, even if it could be wrong and would end up with me eating ice creams and watching Disney movies all day.
He was like a cup of tea on a rainy day, irresistible and addictive!
His tongue entered mine with no resistance from me, mine met his halfway. My fingers curled in his hair, pulling them lightly. A throaty moan made its way from his throat into mine, making my insides clench in forbidden desire. He pushed me back, freeing my lips and attacking my neck. The steering wheel stung my back but that was my least concern, my attention was on the craving erupting in my stomach, raising every hair in attention at his mere touch and kiss.
I could do this forever and still be insatiable!
I moaned with pleasure and clenched my insides as he lips created havoc in my body. “Your lips and skin are so soft.” He whispered, still placing open mouthed kisses on my neck. His hands lifted my top and entered inside. The sudden contact of his cold hands and my warm waist made me gasp.
I groaned in sheer pleasure, unconsciously grinding against him. His hands gripped my waist tightly, stopping me. “Don’t, it’s already hard to control myself.”
“Then don’t.” I panted desperately, my eyes half closed.
He groaned loudly, “You do things to me Joanna, things I don’t understand.”
Right back at you, Bryan. Right back at you.
His mouth assaulted mine again, claiming me. Taking me to places I had never imagined. For the first time in my life, I wanted to lose my virginity and didn’t care about the aftermath.
Fuck virginity. Quite literally.
“We should go.” He murmured on my lips, not releasing his hold.
I heaved, still befuddled by the new sensations. My mind screamed, No! Let’s get done with this for once and all but I knew once wasn’t enough for us and I surely didn’t want our first time in a car. “We should.” I agreed, sighing to myself.
“Don’t think this is over yet.” He lifted his hip, grinding against me. I nodded mutely, eyes closing again as I moved against him. He pecked my lips one last time and freed me. I scrambled to my seat, my mind reeling.
What just happened? Was he going to ignore me again?
“Don’t ignore me.” I whispered, staring at my knotted fingers, still trying to get my breathing even.
I felt his gaze on me, “I can’t, even if I tried.”
That’s progress. Right?
I watched out of the window, the surroundings passing by in a normal speed. I took that time to wrap my head around the incidents happening in my life. I had so many questions and no answers, I hoped to get them today. I knew he had many questions too.
I could feel curiosity rolling off his body at my sudden outburst on the speed driving but he wisely kept quiet.
I peeked at Ace, a small smile, content yet unraveling, it stuck on his face making him look innocent and even more gorgeous, a Greek God who just kissed the living daylights out of me. A small smile spread of my face. He was right, we can never be friends. We have far too much chemistry to remain just friends.
Sometimes a heart refuses to remain ‘just friends’.
“What are you staring at?” He asked with amusement.
“You.” I answered without any hesitation.
His smile widened, pleased with my reply. “What about me?”
I titled my head back, getting a better look at his face. “How different you are and how special make me feel.” I paused, “At times. Otherwise you’re just an asshole.”
He glanced at me and then turned to face the road again. “I am not perfect, I’ll make mistakes.” He warned. “And thanks for the compliment.”
I rolled my eyes at the last sentence. Only he would take an insult as a compliment. “Imperfection is beautiful.” I whispered. “If we don’t make mistakes, how will we know what is right and what is wrong? Mistakes just bring us one step closer to being more awesome.”
He snorted. “You stop making mistakes then. You already are pretty darn awesome.”
I let out a low laugh. “I know right? I am mega awesome.”
There was a lapse of comfortable silence, until he said “You have changed, a bit.” Quickly he added. “In a good way.”
In that moment I realized that I had indeed changed. My habit of analyzing things over and over again, not rebelling, hardly lying to my family, sitting in the middle of 200 page books as I studied, fear of people’s views on everything I do – had all changed.
Now I was the girl who didn’t think much, shouted from a terrace of a 20 floor building to help my friends, lied to family like it was my favorite pastime, and sat beside a bad boy after kissing him senselessly, not give a shit about what people thought. Yes, I had changed and I hoped it was for good.
Grab any chance you get to change because you change only for the people who would change for you.
–
“Want to have a shower?” He asked, entering our room. I froze, dirty thoughts filling my head. “Uh- what?”
He shook his head in mild laughter. “Not together, alone.”
“Oh, no!” I shook my head. “I am hungry.”
“Okay, let’s see what this hotel has.” He kept our bags on the table and went for my hand. I willingly entrusted it to him.
“What is this?” I asked in a low voice, staring at some green thick juice.
“I think its soup.” He replied, taking a sniff of it.
I wrinkled my nose in disgust, pulling him away. I wasn’t going to risk my health by tasting it.
“Noodles and sausages and shrimps.” He sighed with relief.
“I am trying to turn vegetarian.” I informed him, looking for any sign of vegetables.
“Why?”
I shrugged. “I want to.”
“I think there is rice and fries over there.” He pointed to a corner labeled Veg.
I went there and helped myself with a small amount of rice and mixed vegetable. If it was edible I could take another spoon. I saw some sweets on a nearby table and grabbed a handful of pies and cakes. Nothing can ever go wrong with sweet dishes.
“This is good.” Ace muttered, eating the chicken noodles.
“Surprisingly.” I added, eating my second round of rice and sweets.
After eating we went to our room and suddenly the atmosphere dipped and turned into curiosity and nervousness. He hadn’t forgotten about my waterworks and he wanted to know more.
“I need a shower.” I gulped and ran into the washroom, my towel and clothes in hand.
Usually cold showers made me feel relaxed but this time I was still standing stiff under the water. I was tired after a long day but I knew I had to tell Ace the truth especially if I expected the same from him.
Sharing secrets is just another sign of trust.
Rubbing my body one last time, I wiped away the drops and wore my PJ’s and Disney princess tee. Here goes nothing.