I was keeping my books in the locker when I heard clicking sound, I shifted a little to see where the sound is coming from and my eyes landed on Ellen. She was standing across the corridor wearing a short skirt and a beautiful crop top. I figured out that the sound was coming from her heels. She was wearing long ones. She looked taller than me. No wonder she looked beautiful. She is really pretty. Her figure is just like a supermodel. Then I saw her tugging at someone’s arm.
I shifted my gaze a little and found it to be Ray.
My heart started racing. My breath hitched. It felt like I couldn’t breathe anymore. Raymond has such an effect on me. But the sad part here is-
Ellen is tugging on his arms and she is rubbing his biceps seductively.
I felt hurt. Thousands of question started occupying my mind. I was too lost. Ellen looked at me and gave me a sympathetic smile. It felt like someone is stabbing me in my heart. It’s like I want to breathe and I can’t. It’s like someone is pushing me down and I’m trying hard to climb up. I felt broke. Not only by what I saw. Ellen was too close to ray but the fact that Ray didn’t do anything about it. He was standing there calmly. As is nothing is wrong.
And I was standing right across them. My heart felt heavy. My body fell numb. I was choked. I wanted to speak but I couldn’t, I wanted to cry but I couldn’t.
It’s like I’m in some movie. Everything is moving in slow motion. I saw Ellen saying something to Raymond, standing very close to him and he was grinning and then…….. they kissed.
Raymond didn’t see me. How could he do this to me? I’m standing right across the corridor and he hasn’t even seen me yet. His eyes were only on one person. Ellen.
And they are kissing. Like only two of them are there in this world. Only them.
Maybe I was wrong.
Maybe I don’t mean anything to him.
Maybe I’m just another girl to him.
Just another fling
He is not even looking at me once. He knows about my presence here. But he’s not even looking.
My mind is screaming a thousand words.
Look at me, Ray!
What happened yesterday doesn’t mean anything to you?
Am I just another girl?
All the concern you showed, was it fake.
Look at me goddammit.
Look at me. Look into my eyes.
Stop what you are doing. It hurts.
It fucking hurts Raymond.
STOP torturing me.
I know you don’t love me. Love has deep meaning. I don’t know what it is between us. Maybe just like? I know those blue eyes didn’t lie when they showed concern. I know they didn’t.
Suddenly I felt an arm around my waist. It was a tight grip. I shifted my head to see Dany standing next to me. His eyes showed pure concern, they were asking me to hold. His eyes were giving me strength and hope at the same time. Hope. That everything will be fine. He was telling me to stay strong.
Then we walked away. My feet weren’t coordinating. I was still numb and cold. Dany tightens his grip and then I lost it. I lost control over my tears which I was holding back.
Tears started to stream down my face. I’m weak.
Am I obsolete for everyone?