POV: Lianne
‘Why didn’t you tell me the truth?’
Standing like a ghost in a flashback, I saw myself in a bedroom facing the door with my forehead pressed against the wood. I was banging the portal with my clenched fists, venting out my frustration with the poor inanimate object instead of the man who stood on the other side.
Ruen. Yes. Him.
He looked lost; his mouth in a thin line and his jaw tense. His palm was pressed against the door, trying to push it, but without success.
‘Please calm down Lianne, ‘ he said with genuine concern.
I saw myself inhale deeply, my cleavage almost popping out of my corset.
‘For all this time, I was suffering in this place. I feel restrained in my every move, and the fact that every day of my life I am drowned by the loathing and hatred I feel towards that man! You know what I feel! You know how much I am in pain! You know how much I detested you by the single belief that you are Garlow’s son!’
‘Lianne, please open this door!’ Ruen shouted and I cringed at the sight of him in agony. ‘Just loathe me! Hate me! Say what caustic words you have to say. Vent your anger in me. Just please, open this damned door!’
My past self seemed stubborn enough not to give in. She heaved a breath and continued pounding the wooden door as if it was his chest she – or I – was trying to hurt.
‘You don’t even know the torment I am feeling after that single night. I feel that I was betraying myself for letting you touch me, for letting you hold me, for letting myself get carried away. Dammit Ruen, why?! You don’t even know how much I was so relieved to know that you are not the real son of Garlow! Don’t I deserve to know the truth? Can’t you see that that is the sole reason why I hated you?! My God Ruen! It made me almost insane to think that I was the worst of all, believing that I have betrayed my family, believing that I have tainted their precious memory, believing that I have insulted their grave… for… for falling in love with you.’
My mind reeled with the vision in my front. Tears slowly trickled down from my eyes in time with the tears that my past self shed.
‘Lianne, I want to embrace you, ‘ Ruen managed to speak and that made me realize he was as much in despair as I was.
‘Please open this door.’
***
I felt a hand touch my face tenderly like I was a fragile vase. Upon opening my eyes, I realized I was back in the present when I saw Ruen sitting at the edge of the bed, facing me, looking intently worried.
‘Where was I again?’ My brain was a bit dried out, I couldn’t recognize where I was.
“Lianne, are you all right?”
I stared at him, my attention fixed on him and him alone.
He moved closer beside me and lightly patted his fingers on the corner of my eye. That simple action informed me that they were actually wet with tears.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t-”
“Shhh, I understand. What did you see this time?” he asked.
I gazed into his orbs, those beautiful brown-greens which showed intense sadness during my flashback and then answered, “You. Me.”
I scanned the room we were in and realized that we were actually now in my old bedroom. “Here, in this room. I was crying back then, arguing with you for not telling me the truth.”
“Hmm, I see, ” was his calm answer, but I clearly saw the turmoil in his eyes. “What do you feel now?” he asked as if the vision could change how I felt towards him.
But he might be right. I do feel betrayed right now, a bit played for a fool, but he showed warmth and sincerity at that time. He showed that he was in deep regret.
To ease his worries, I cupped his chin and answered, “I am happy Ruen. Falling in love with you is my ultimate freedom.”
He squeezed his eyes shut, pulling off a serene look of contentment.
“Lianne, falling in love with you is my salvation. I did what I could back then to keep you safe from Garlow. If ever you felt betrayed-”
“Shhhh…” I pressed my fingers against his lips, stopping him. I know he wanted to explain but the vision was enough to help me understand the truth.
“You don’t need to explain anything. Just you being here with me is enough. Thank you for protecting my heart.”
He leaned forward to kiss me. I waited with eager anticipation.
When our lips touched, it licked to life our already searing desires.
I wanted to make love to him in this room. I badly wanted to and it seemed he felt the same way.
He deepened his kiss, so much so that I moaned when he abandoned my lips to trail scorching kisses from the corner of my mouth to the length of my neck.
“Ruen, please don’t stop, ” I requested, and right then and there he climbed on the mattress to rain more kisses on my lips, neck, and shoulder.
He unzipped my Marchesa gown in just a blink and then pulled it down my legs. Subsequently, he arranged himself in between my legs and once again dipped low to capture my exposed breasts.
In a bold move, I slid my hands beneath his shirt, lightly massaged his quivering back muscles, and then continued my wanderings into the firm plane of his abdomen. I felt him respond a groan as he captured one of my earlobes between his teeth.
“Lianne, you are not making it easy for me.”
I grinned with his comment. “I love to touch you. It makes me feel that you are truly here with me and not just a fleeting vision.”
“Then I’ll make this as real as you could ever imagine. I had been longing for many years to hold you in this room once again.”