OLIVIA…
The rumble of Jim’s snores woke me. The volume rather surprised me as did the fact I’d apparently slept through quite a bit of it.
I eased from the covers and sat up, taking my time and gauging how my back felt. A night’s rest had helped. Oh, it still hurt, but it didn’t quite burn with pain like it had the day before. Standing, I made my way to the bathroom and closed myself in.
The Others swirled around me, outlining the toilet, sink, and shower. I used the toilet then washed my hands and brushed my teeth. Although I tried to move quietly, I still disturbed Jim’s sleep. While I rinsed my mouth, I saw him sit up and run a hand over his face.
Opening the door, I stepped out with an apology ready.
“You are so beautiful,” he breathed.
I felt my cheeks begin to heat and crossed my arms over my chest.
He stood and walked toward me before gently coaxing my arms away. He made a pained sound, and I knew he was looking where he shouldn’t. And, heaven help me, I wanted him to keep doing it. My pulse dipped then jumped dangerously.
“Don’t hide from me. Don’t feel embarrassed about what I feel for you.” He smoothed his fingers over my cheek. “When I think you feel shame, it starts to hurt. I can’t stop what I feel. Please don’t make me hurt more because of it.”
I exhaled heavily. Hurting him was the last thing I wanted. Yet, I knew before this ended, he would be very hurt. The knowledge of what we both still needed to endure had me stepping forward. The need to wrap my arms around his waist and hug him warred with logic. My back wouldn’t take that kind of stretching. Instead, I set my hands on his sides and leaned against him.
Jim tensed then placed his hands on my shoulders and rested his chin on top of my head. Closing my eyes, I let myself enjoy the simple physical contact. The shadowy memory of the last hug I’d received paled in comparison to this moment.
A shudder went through Jim. Then another. I didn’t move or try to pull away. Breathing deeply, I tried to memorize his scent.
“If I weren’t a Judgement or hurt, what would happen next?” I asked, craving a glimpse of what my life could be like if things were different.
His pulse spiked under my ear, and he grunted. Still, he didn’t release me.
“I’d try to get you to say yes.” His rough, pained words brought more despair than comfort.
“Yes to what?”
“To me.”
I pulled back, and he let me go.
“If I weren’t a Judgement or connected to Blake, I would say yes,” I said sadly.
He stopped breathing and pressed his hand to his chest. The Others started to swirl around him in a frenzy, and he slowly sank to a knee.
Panic gripped me. I’d said too much. I’d opened up too much.
“Jim, don’t leave me. I can’t do this without you.”
Just as I reached for him, the door burst open. Whoever strode in, moved too fast for me to identify them by their walk or shape.
One came toward me. The other went toward Jim. In seconds, I was up in someone’s arms and being taken from the room. The pressure on my back brought tears to my eyes.
“He needs to be okay,” I said desperately. “Make sure he’s okay.”
“We will,” Winifred said. “He just needs a little space to calm down.”
“Please let me walk,” I begged, unable to hold back a moan of pain.
I immediately found myself on my feet.
“I’m so sorry, Olivia. I wasn’t thinking.”
“No, it’s okay. Jim first. I understand.”
“I can see why he was having trouble,” she said. “Your shirt is slightly see through.”
I blushed.
“I didn’t know when I packed it.”
“I imagine not.”
“Do you have one I could borrow? Is it morning yet? I had a watch that told me the time, but Frank took it.”
“It’s after six. Close enough to morning. Let’s get you a shirt.”
I followed her the rest of the way to her room, and saw two other people laying snuggled in bed before she opened the door.
“I’ll wait out here,” I said.
“Nonsense. Come in. Michelle’s up already, anyway.”
As soon as I stepped into the room, I noticed one of the pair held an object. The shape had me thinking it might be some kind of tablet.
“Morning, Olivia. It’s Michelle,” Michelle said.
Surprise shot through me. No one ever announced themselves, leaving me to guess based on their voices and movement. Her consideration warmed me.
“Good morning, Michelle. Couldn’t sleep?” I asked as Winifred went to look through the bags in her room.
“Not really. I kept thinking about the desert I saw in the white room. I think I might have found it.”
“Don’t tell me,” I said quickly. “Not yet. The less I know about where we are going, the safer we are while we wait for the answers.”
“Uh…okay.”
“This one should work,” Winifred said, straightening.
I accepted the shirt and went into the bathroom to change. It took some effort, and I ached by the time I finished. Wanting to lay down again, I left the bathroom and turned toward Winifred.
“Is Jim all right enough for me to return?”
“What happened to Jim?” Michelle asked, concern lacing her voice.
“He saw Olivia in the shirt she was just wearing,” Winifred answered.
“Oh.”
Emmitt suddenly got out of bed and strode toward the door.
“Where are you going?” Winifred asked.
“Don’t worry; I’m going to help. I have some advice to give Jim about cookies.”
He left, closing the door behind him and leaving me confused.
“Emmitt is Jim’s brother,” Michelle said. “Jim gave Emmitt a hard time when I first moved in with them.”
“So he’s going to give Jim a hard time? Now?”
“Probably.”
“But, Jim’s hurting,” I said.
Michelle sighed. “I know. So does Emmitt. He’s been more than a little worried since Jim saw you and recognized you as a potential Mate. We all have. No one wants Jim to suffer or die because of what he feels for you.”
I swallowed hard and said nothing. Fate was too cruel.