After the kids and Michelle went upstairs to get ready for bed, I paced Jim’s living room. She didn’t trust me because someone else had given her a reason not to trust. I needed to give her a reason to trust me.
Despite Jim’s advice, I felt the truth was the key. Trusting her with my secret would show her she could trust me. One, it would be telling her the truth about me before we went any further in our relationship. Not that there was a relationship, yet. But, the truth might make that more possible because she would see that I could protect her against anything. Which would be the second reason to tell her the truth. Sure, she might freak out a little like Jim said, but Mom had learned to accept Dad. Michelle could accept me.
Nerves and anticipation kept me up most the night. When I heard the boys moving upstairs, I quickly showered and went outside to start working. It didn’t take much time before the boys joined me. Michelle came out and sat on the porch, watching.
It took me longer than it should have to put the set together. What-ifs and doubts clouded my mind. The bottom line was that not telling Michelle what I was felt like a lie. And, I wouldn’t lie to her. I couldn’t. That didn’t mean I embraced telling her the truth. What if she ran without giving me a chance?
It was well after lunch when I finally secured the swing set to the ground and gave the boys the go-ahead to play. They raced for the tower and started climbing up.
Letting out a long breath, I turned and joined Michelle on the porch. She kept her eyes on the boys as they played. I sat next to her and watched them, too. I realized that in order to tell her about me, I needed to separate her from her brothers. I didn’t want to scare all three of them.
“I bought a movie when I went to the store,” I said.
I felt her turn to look at me. She quietly studied me for a while.
“Would you like to watch it with me?” I asked.
“I can watch the boys out here if you two want to go in,” Winifred said from her chair on the porch.
A swell of determination spiced Michelle’s scent as she stood and told her brothers that she would be right inside if they needed her. I quickly stood, too, and ignored the wink Winifred sent my way.
Michelle followed me to Jim’s apartment. Now that the time was here, I hesitated. I went to the TV and grabbed the movie I really had purchased in town. I turned and held it up with a hopeful smile.
The hope that we could sit together for a while before I broke the news to her died at her serious expression.
“Emmitt,” she said, reluctantly. “I really appreciate you letting us stay here, but I don’t know how long we’ll be here, and can’t afford any emotional distractions.”
At first, her words hurt. She was ready to leave before we’d even gotten started. Then, I realized what she’d said. Emotional distractions.
“What are we talking about, exactly?”
“The way you look at me…” she whispered with a blush.
Oh, the things she could do to me. The color in her cheeks and the shy look in her eyes made my chest tight. I wanted to touch her and have her touch me in return. My face. My hair. It didn’t matter. Just any sign of affection. I was starting to feel a little starved for it.
And there she was, telling me it wasn’t going to happen. But, she didn’t know about the pull. About werewolves. About me. When she did understand, she’d change her song. However, I could see this wasn’t the moment to tell her. Not with her standing there all wary and defensive.
“I see. Michelle, when I saw you in the diner, and again when you faced David, I knew you needed a friend.”
She stayed quiet a moment.
“Friendship might be more than I can manage,” she said, finally.
I nodded, sad for her, and looked down at the movie in my hands. I lifted it slightly and looked up at her with a half-smile.
“So, is that a no to a movie?”
“It’s a yes to the movie and a no to anything else.”
“Fair enough.”
She sat on the couch while I started the movie. The squeal of the machine didn’t annoy me as it once had. I’d gotten used to it over the years.
For the next two hours, we sat side by side, not quite touching. The rumble of Michelle’s truck echoed distantly before the final scene. It sucked that Jim would be home before I could talk to her again, but maybe it was for the best.
Just as the movie ended, Jim walked through the door and plopped down onto the couch next to Michelle. He grinned at me and slipped an arm around Michelle’s shoulders. She didn’t seem to mind.
“Where do you work?” she asked, turning to him.
I was going to kick his ass later. Standing, I went to turn off the television.
“Roadside construction. Thanks for letting me use your truck,” he said. Then, in the reflection of the TV, I watched him kiss her cheek.
“You need to shower,” I said without turning.
Winifred, I’m going to kill him.
Your mother will never forgive you.
She’ll get over it. Eventually.
Jim laughed and sauntered back to the bathroom.
Michelle stood, too.
“Thanks for the movie, Emmitt.”
I nodded, unable to turn around and look at her as she left because my canines were showing.
Once I knew she was out of hearing, I stood and went to lean against the bathroom door.
“What the hell were you thinking?”
Despite the running water and the closed door, Jim heard me.
“Showing you how it’s done. You’re making this way too hard. You know she’s the one, start putting some moves on her.”
“You’re the one who said she wasn’t ready.”
“For the truth. Every girl is ready for some moves.”
“I’ve got some moves for you,” I said with a growl.
“You’re not my type.”
I slapped a hand on the door and walked away as Michelle called the kids inside for the evening.
Settling in for another long night, I went to the fridge and grabbed a beer. Winifred joined me not long afterward.
“Jim still breathing?” she asked with a smile.
Jim walked out of the bathroom just then.
“Always. Emmitt loves me.”
I rubbed a hand over my brow. “If you were so sure of that, why did you stay in there till Winifred came over?”
“It’s smart to play it safe.”
“Jim, I think you and I should go for a run,” Winifred said.
“Emmitt and I were going to watch a movie.”
It was a lie. However, Jim had mastered the art of lying so there were no telltale signs, and Winifred knew it, too. But, she shook her head and walked out the door without him. With a sigh, I sat on the couch.
Jim plopped down next to me. “You going to forgive me tonight or tomorrow?”
“Definitely not tonight.”
I heard a few laughs and giggles from upstairs, then everything went relatively quiet. The sounds of footsteps on the stairs not long after brought me to my door.
“This is so pathetic to watch,” Jim said quietly.
“Then, don’t watch.” I went back to peering into the hall. Sure enough, Michelle was coming down.
“Do you know where Nana is?” she asked, pointing at Winifred’s open door.
“She stepped out for a walk,” I said, easing the door behind me closed. Jim chuckled. “Did you need something?”
“I wanted to ask if I could borrow a book.”
“Come on,” I said, moving toward Winifred’s apartment. “She would insist you take your pick.” I went to the large bookcase. “She used to be a teacher, you know. She loves curious minds and reading.”
“Thanks,” she said, taking two books from one of the shelves. Romances. That was a good sign, right?
She gave me another one of her killer shy smiles then jogged back up the stairs.
Jim was gone from the living room when I opened the door. I fell onto the couch and tried to sleep. It took forever.
****
The next day, I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to tell Michelle the truth. There was even a perfect opportunity when the boys discovered Winifred’s paw print by the shed. But instead of telling Michelle the print was made by us, I told her the dog was friendly and the kids didn’t need to worry.
The rest of the afternoon I cleaned up the garage and kicked myself for the lost opportunity.
Thursday morning Winifred woke me early with a knock on the door.
“You need a distraction,” she said. “Your pacing is keeping me up at night.”
“Sorry. I was going to start working on the apartment upstairs today.”
“That’s a good idea. For her, right?”
I nodded.
“That’ll help. Focus on making it perfect for her. Just another way to win her over.”
She was right. After a quick shower, I went upstairs and got to work.
Knowing Michelle was sleeping right across the hall caused conflicting emotions. It eased a tension I hadn’t known I’d carried. But it almost made me want to be even closer. Michelle was my drug, and I only wanted more.
I heard the three moving around and listened as they went outside to play. With the windows open, every word the boys said reached me. Michelle was quieter, and her silence drove me crazy.
As the morning progressed, though, Aden seemed to get on Liam’s nerves. Thinking of Jim, I understood how that could happen. However, their bickering seemed to get on Michelle’s nerves, too. She never yelled at them, but the tension in her voice told the truth.
Around lunch, she brought the kids inside. I looked at the half-painted living room and kitchen, and wondered if she would like help with the boys more than a new place. Jim had gutted everything and used his job money to reframe an open-concept living room and kitchen, along with a bathroom. He’d kept the existing bedrooms but had knocked out the old lathe and plaster, and had re-drywalled, mudded, and textured everything. Then he’d quit.
There was no mystery why. Jim loved the rough work, not the finishing work. I didn’t mind the painting, though.
Listening to Michelle turn the TV on, I figured she had gotten the boys corralled so I kept working.
When they went back outside, the boys continued their light bickering throughout the afternoon. I didn’t realize how much it had bothered Michelle until Jim came home.
As he killed the engine, I quickly put the lid on the current can of paint.
“Rough day?” he called.
Michelle remained quiet as the truck door creaked open.
“Me, too,” I heard Jim say. “Want to go out for a drink?”
Hell, no. I left the apartment and hurried down the stairs.