I walk to the door, and Jonah catches up to me, only now he has a shirt on with his flannel pajama pants. I look away, not wanting to waste any more time here.
We step into the elevator, and I press the button, feeling awkward. I know things won’t be the same now; they can’t be. I should never have come here. It was a mistake because now I have lost my only friend. That alone hurts so much, and I wish I could reverse time and stop him from admitting his feelings.
I want to go back to how it was before then…
“Geez, Mara, can you say something instead of just standing there? If you don’t feel the same, that is fine, but I wasn’t going to pretend anymore that I don’t love you. I am sick of waiting for you to realize I do, and now you are running away from me,” Jonah says, folding his arms across his chest and leaning against the elevator wall.
Is he really going to act like there is no issue with that? The entire thing doesn’t make sense to me.
“I’m not running. We aren’t mates, Jonah. You have a mate out there! I have a mate, so we can’t be together! You know that,” I say in exasperation.
“Says who?” he challenges.
“Says fate,” I tell him, shaking my head. This can never be, so why can’t he see that?
“Fuck fate, I don’t care about fate. I care about you, I want you Mara. Isn’t that enough?” I wish I could believe those words, but for how long will I live that fantasy until it’s ripped away from me?
“And what about Kyan? I am not coming between you and Kyan and your weird bond. Just because he doesn’t want me doesn’t mean he will let you have me,” I remind him quietly.
“I can handle Kyan and Kaif; we can. He will get used to the idea, he will learn to share,” Jonah mutters the last part.
“Share?” I shake my head, almost laughing.
“I have no intentions of keeping you to myself Mara. I know Kyan is your mate, he loves you, and I know you want your mate, but I also know you want me too.” He tries to reason, and I realize he is serious about this. How could he be?
“I am not some toy. You can’t just share me just because you want me! It’s not that easy Jonah.” I roll my eyes at his sudden outburst of stupidity.
“Why not? Your mother has two mates, and so do your fathers,” he asks, genuinely confused.
“Exactly, Jonah, they are all mates, or do you love Kyan too?” My eyes widen as I look up at him. I never thought their relationship was like that.
“Yes, like a brother, not a lover, but we can work it out.” I shake my head.
He makes no sense. My parents work because they are all mates. You can’t just choose whoever you want on a whim. He is fucking delusional. “You have a mate out there,” I remind him because he really seems to be forgetting that vital part.
“And you already found yours, so tell me, Mara? Tell me you don’t feel the same way, and I will walk away, and you can be with Kyan.”
My eyes burn, and my throat restricts. I do want you, Jonah. I’ve always wanted you. But I’m unable to say that out loud.
“He will kill Jonah; Kyan will kill him to hurt us,” Kora warns me sadly before whimpering.
“We don’t know that,” I tell her, though I have a feeling she is right. Kyan would just hurt us by hurting him if we ever admitted or tried to be with Jonah. No, I can’t consider what Jonah is trying to tell me.
“We do. He said we belong to him, that he chooses what we are to him. It isn’t safe,” Kora whimpers, drawing me from my thoughts.
“Mara,” Jonah whispers softly, and I glance at him to find him right next to me and that he has stepped closer while I was debating with Kora. His hands run up my waist before he steps closer again, and I am forced to look up at him.
“Jonah, let go. We can’t,” I tell him softly, but even I can’t hear the willpower in my voice. His closeness and his touch is distracting me, weakening my resolve.
“Can’t what, Mara? Be together?” I nod, glancing away, his scent overwhelming me.
“Because you don’t want to be, or because you are scared of what Kyan will do?” I look back up at him. “Tell me you don’t want to be with me, Mara, and I will back off. Is that what you want? Do you want me to back off?”
Yet the look he gives me makes it impossible for me to lie. No matter how much I try to, I can’t. I can’t bring myself to hurt him by lying to him.
“Jonah,” my voice is more of a squeak, and my heart flutters spastically like it is about to bounce out of my chest.
His lips tug up, and I suddenly forget how to breathe when his hand grips the back of my neck, and the other hand moves to my hip pulling me flush against him as his lips brush against mine.
His lips move against mine as he speaks, so warm and tempting, so right but wrong. “Tell me you don’t want me as much as I want you.” His voice is so husky and low that it makes my stomach flutter.
My brain feels like mush as I’m still trying to process what the heck is going on. But even then, one thought remains clear, and that is what the consequences might be. That thought alone petrifies me.
“Kyan would feel it,” I whisper, trying to pull away, whereas Jonah refuses to move and just pushes me against the elevator wall, effectively trapping me with his body. And I can’t deny how good it feels.
“And that’s the only reason you’re refusing me? Can I take that as a yes, that you want to be with me?” Jonah asks, his voice almost a purr.
I swallow before answering, needing him to stop and let me go before Kyan hunts us both down and kills us. Well, me because he can’t kill Jonah since they have their weird blood bond, but he can still kill me.
“Yes! Ok, fine! I want you Jonah, but what about Kyan?” My words are suddenly cut off when his lips collide with mine, swallowing my protests.