So, I rinse my hair out like I usually do, but then, I feel his hand run over my stomach, making my eyes snap open. His other hand cups my breast and squeezes it. His lips move up my neck before he pushes me out of the water spray, and his chest presses flush against my back.
He kisses behind my ear, and the hand on my breast moves, flipping my hair over my shoulder, allowing him better access to my mark. His hand goes to my chin, turning my face up to his. He dips his head over my shoulder, his hand on my stomach, pulling me closer as his lips capture mine.
My breath hitches when his hand moves between my thighs, cupping my pussy and making me moan into his mouth.
My earlier embarrassment is now gone, and it is only Andrei, my mate. He is mine.
Andrei presses his erection against me, my body instantly reacts to him, and I push back against him. He pulls away, letting out a breath and kissing my shoulder. His fingers brush over my slit, his finger part my lips and prod at my entrance. I suck in a breath, and Andrei stops.
His breathing is heavy next to my ear, and I know he is waiting for permission. He always does.
I press back against him. His lips go to my neck, and he sucks on my mark, tingles spread everywhere as his tongue runs over it, and then he shoves his finger inside me.
I groan at the feeling of him pushing against my inner walls as he slowly slides it out and adds another. A breathy moan escapes me as he works his fingers into me. My walls clamp around them as he builds up friction, and I lean against him, my legs going weak, but I want more, even though the thought petrifies me.
My own body betrays me as desire courses through me. It feels wrong to want something when I know that the very thing I crave so much is the thing that destroyed me.
“We can stop,” Andrei purrs, despite his erection pressing against me. I don’t want him to stop, but I do. Fear, pain, and shame smash and batter me, yet Andrei never makes me feel any of those things.
I turn in his arms, his fingers leave me, and I look up at him. He watches me with concern like he is worried he has pushed me too far. I reach up on my tippy toes and wrap my arms around his neck. He leans down, letting me kiss him, his hands cradle my hips as I press closer to him and then pull away slightly.
“I want to,” I tell him, and I feel Sierra pressing calm over me but also not forcing me.
She never does, though I can tell she wants to force control. However, that is one thing I know she wouldn’t do.
“Sierra?” Andrei asks. I shake my head.
“No, I want to, Andrei. It’s not Sierra pushing me to,” I tell him, and he grips my face, staring at me intently.
“I can feel her forward,” he growls, letting me go and shutting the water off. He always stops if she is forward because he is worried she is taking my choice.
Andrei hops out, grabs a towel, and wraps it around himself. I hop out of the shower, and grab my own just as he walks into the bedroom.
“Command me to answer. Command Sierra to back off,” I tell him when I feel his doubt hit me.
He stops, and I nearly walk into the back of him. Sierra never pushes me, but her influence has forced me to freak out because I couldn’t recognize my limits with her urges.
Andrei turns around to look down at me. “You know I don’t like doing that to you, Sage,” he says, and I step around him, drying myself. Andrei watches me for a second.
“If it’s not Sierra, why did you run?” He asks, and my cheeks flush.
“I was embarrassed,” I admit.
“Of what?”
“Of wanting you when I usually shove you away,” I tell him as I sit on the edge of the bed.
Why am I so fucked up? Now, even Andrei doubts my words.
He steps closer and grips my face, forcing me to look at him. “Sierra, recede,” he commands, and my eyes flicker before I feel her shove completely out, where I can’t reach her.
Andrei lets out a breath, feeling her leave. “Do you want this? Answer me,” He commands, and I see him swallow nervously.
“Yes, yes, I want you, Andrei,” I breathe. I can feel myself relax as I hear my own answer.
Though I know it isn’t Sierra, the fact that Andrei doubts my answer makes me doubt my own thoughts and Sierra’s influence over me.
Andrei growls, his eyes flick onyx and then return to their normal color. His grip on my face tightens, and his lips smash against mine in a bruising kiss that makes me gasp.
His tongue delves between my lips, yet his hands remain gentle as he wraps his arm around my waist, hauling me to the center of the bed with him.
His chest is warm against mine as he presses himself between my legs, his heart beating against mine calmly, despite the torn feeling swirling inside him.
I wrap my legs around his waist, tugging him closer, wanting to make the doubt in him vanish as I kiss him back with just as much hunger.
“Let Sierra go,” I mumble against his lips, and he pulls away.
“Why?” Andrei tilts his head to the side, scrutinizing my face, looking for any doubt.
“So she can sense Donnie,” I tell him.
“I don’t like the idea of that, Sage.”
“Please,” I whisper, and he looks away before he sighs and nods. His aura rushes over me, making me shiver.
“Sierra, return,” he growls, and I feel the veil lift, granting her access to the front of my mind. I tug Andrei back to me and kiss him, but he pulls away, his aura rushing over me again.
“You don’t force her,” Andrei tells her and I feel my eyes bleed black to my wolf.
“Never,” Sierra purrs at him, then she gives me back control. Andrei relaxes, dropping the command, his aura slips away as he stares down at me.