I’ll never forget how nervous yet excited I had felt that night. He was able to turn my mind off completely, and it really was just us, through to the morning.
And nothing else mattered.
“Dove, what -”
“Why haven’t you touched me since I got here? Why have you been so distant?”
“I -”
But a groan escapes my lips when my thumb brushes over the sensitive bud, and he’s silenced immediately.
He walks over to the bed, dropping the jacket he had held in his hands to the floor. His frame looked exquisite in the dimly lit room, underneath his white see-through shirt.
Which I needed off.
“Does it matter?” He crawls over to me, his knee spreading my legs even further, so that he could place himself between my thighs, and hover above me.
“No,” I breathe out, and arch my back off the bed slightly, “I suppose it doesn’t.”
“But -”
“Theo,” I pout, and lean up to kiss him on the lips. He doesn’t pull away, but he doesn’t necessarily go in for it either.
“Are you sure we should be doing this still?”
What?
“Since when do you have morals?” I cease my movements completely, growing slightly irritated.
He’s looking down at me, a hint of worry in his eyes.
Why is he thinking so much into this, and why now?
“I don’t, but I -”
“Theo, you’ve never had a problem with this before. Don’t start now.”
I brush my lips against his one more time, and he lets out a groan in defeat, before kissing me, really kissing me. I moan against his mouth in relief, because it’s been so long since I’ve had him this close, and we had wasted the four full days we’ve had by not doing this sooner.
My hands reach down between us to unbuckle his belt, and he pulls away slightly.
“Wait, wait -”
“What the hell is wrong?” I shamelessly protest, but then when I refuse to stop, and one of my hand slides down his lower stomach and hovers above the bulge in his boxers, he shakes his head and says, “nothing. Keep going,” to which I smile a victorious smile, and do as I’m told.
When I grip his length through the fabric, he grunts.
“Fuck, it’s been so long,” he whines, and for a moment my mind goes to that dark place again, and want to laugh at him for saying this when he was probably with Yasmine just now. But I don’t say anything – I need this, and I’m taking it.
I’ve had enough of waiting.
“Touch me,” I moan, and he silences me by slipping a finger in, then two, and curling them, now supporting his weight above me only on one arm.
“Theo,” his name tumbles out, as his lips move to my neck, and he sucks so harshly that it’s almost painful, but then his tongue darts out to soothe the ache, and the pressure builds in my stomach.
“I want you to come for me,” he groans, when my grip on his erection tightens, after I had slipped my hand fully in his boxers.
I simply nod, and push his head down slightly as to direct him to give me more, to which he catches on quickly, and simply chuckles.
His fingers pumping in and out me are taken out, and I almost go to complain, but then he hooks them into my panties to discard them, and quickly attaches his tongue.
“Oh, god,” I pull on his hair, and rock my hips slightly against his tongue, creating a rhythm with which we can both keep up with.
“Theo, I’m going to-”
“I know. Let go, Dove,” his fingers swipe over my bud, and that’s all it takes for me to come apart against his lips, which continue to suck even after I am finished.
As I go through my orgasm, his hand reaches up to palm my breast through my t-shirt, which I hadn’t realised I was still wearing.
After my breathing returns to normal, I decide on it. I’m not going to wait this out any longer – it’s inevitable, bound to happen at some point, and I need it to happen sooner rather than later. Oral pleasure could never be enough, and with Theo, I’m sure that even sex wouldn’t be, the way I find myself craving him in such extreme ways.
I pull him up from between my thighs, and taste myself on his lips as they reconnect in a sloppy kiss, but it’s fuelled with passion and declarations for one another.
Hidden meanings behind each one.
When I pull away, I look into his brilliant green eyes, and confirm my absolute need for him.
“Theo, I want to do this.”
“Do what?” He looks me over, puzzled for a second, but then he traces my eyes to his still evident erection, and he catches on, “oh.”
“Are you sure?” He asks me, and I give him my most sincere nod, but I know that’s not enough.
“More than anything I’ve ever been sure of in my whole life.”
He kisses my forehead, which I don’t think he’s ever done before. The gesture almost makes me want to burst into tears, because it’s so gentle, and so unlike him when we’re in such intimate and vulnerable positions.
“Do you have a condom?”
He smiles, and simply nods, then breaks eye contact for just a second to pull open the second draw on his nightstand, and his fingers pick up a gold foil packet.
“Dove -”
“I said I’m sure,” I pout, and he laughs lightly at my impatience.
“No, I was going to say that I need you to tell me to stop, if it gets too much, okay?”
“Why?” I ask, my tone child-like.
“Because it’s going to hurt, and I don’t want to hurt you.”
Well okay, I’ve heard that it hurts, but that’s not going to be enough for me to stop you.
I push back those thoughts though, and suppress a smile, and simply nod once in agreement.
We were really doing this.