It was not an effortless decision for it would come with a price. And that price delayed my path of action. I knew the pack would go against me and I knew I would have to execute numerous of my warriors and that fact chained me once more.
It felt as though I was spitting on father’s grave, I was destroying everything he trained me growing up. I wondered if he saw me as shameful, I wondered if he deemed me as his male no more for if he were alive my father would have reprimanded my choices.
That permanent state of hell I was in, that confusion I abhorred it. I was stuck I could not move, annihilating your wolves as an Alpha meant the moon would sentence me for it, she would have to take something from me and I sweated it would be Lumina or Kal.
But observing my female living in discomfort each day because of my discretions, I could not follow it anymore. I could not withstand it so I stood on that stage and I declared the end of the tradition hoping it would pave the path of virtue for Kal so that he would never have to face my wound with his female one day and I was greeted with what I had foreseen.
Teeth. My pack wanted my throat and my throne to correct my wrongdoing in their eyes. I could have dealt with them differently indeed but that battle was not mine but my wolf’s. It was up to him to do what he pleased and I was not willing to stop him. All I could think of was the deceived face of my female and I wanted to repaint it with a smile.
I did not want to overpower them despite having the capability to make them bend so an option of my own I provided them with. Either that could defer to me or face the wrath of my wolf.
That day something had transpired that never happened in our history, there was a division in my pack but I did not mind it because my female came first to me and that would never shift. I released my wolf to take over and claim his throne as I lingered behind and locked my eyes unable to watch the way he slaughtered all my warriors with no remorse, for I knew I would need to seek retribution.
But when Lumina sat down by my feet and cleansed my soiled hands off the blood of my warriors my soul rejoiced for just a small action of hers gave me the solace I needed, she was my peace.
I wanted to tell her it was all for you and Kal but I could not for then she would have thought it was a means to redirect her attention back to me. I wanted her to see my genuineness and not assume my trueness to be tricks.
I told her that my fight for her and Kal would be ceaseless and I wound bind myself to her flesh eternally so that she wouldn’t be able to run from me and I witnessed a small change of her heart.
With time Lumina began to open herself to me, she began to see me like the male I was. We began with refurbishing my cabin for Kal to have privacy in and from there our tension bent and snapped to our blooming closeness.
She began to smile with me again the sweetness she misplaced resurrected to exhibit itself to me and I was enraptured once more by her charm. Little by little I took my time to open her up just as she once did to me when we first met.
And one day she urged me to call her by the name I had given her and that was it. Our souls united and we returned to announcing our love for each other.
At the end of it all, my moon blessed brought me to my knees as I worshipped the goddess she was assuring her that I shall never harm her again. I offered myself to her essence, I was hers until death severed us.
“Deimos?” Lumina questions me softly assembling my awareness as I raise my globes to meet her beaming ones.
“Yes, my female.”
“I have been beckoning you for so long, what is going on that mind of yours?” She asks swaying our newborn female lulling the pup to sleep.
“Nothing. Nothing at all.” I chuckle arising from beneath the shade of the tree to welcome her abrupt presence.
“I sense lies.” She playfully narrows her eyes at me as I laugh at her antics. “I have made supper for us and please for goodness sake bathe Kal he is sprinting around the fields exposed as the day he was born.”
Kal dashes forward to spoil his mother’s clothes with his muddy hands as Lumina gnars at him whilst he mischievously pokes his tongue out at her. “Kal you naughty beast, you better get in that tub before your father arrives you hear me?” She hollers her chest heaving furiously at our male’s deeds. “Do you find this amusing, Deimos?” Her irritation is anchored back to me whilst she notices me affectionately grinning at her.
“Of course not, my female,” I say coiling my hand around her waist stooping down to plant a delicate kiss on her cheek quieting her exasperation. “Come, I shall accompany you home. Has Kal been giving you trouble?”
“Indeed! That male has grown to become too prankish, he does not bend to my will.”
“Shall I spank him then?” I tease her with a smirk on my face as I peer down at her devotedly.
“You better not, if you do so to him I will spank you in return.” She scolds me as I burst into laughter at her words whilst she giggles with me in unison. Our sounds of pleasure booms from our chest reverberating through the open field to imprint themselves beneath the soil of our land.
All I believe is that nothing of our past needs to be retained in my soul except for one element.
*Lumina was, is and shall always be my salvation.*
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