He allows a curt nod in response. “Let’s head for the ceremony.” He says looking ahead waiting for me to walk with him.
An arrow strikes my heart to his open show of emotions. He wishes he was there when Kal smiled for the very first time. He wishes he could have recorded it and celebrated the joyful event with me. I did record it I will show it to him later.
Shutting the main door I walk beside him my eyes stuck to the path never wavering. Kal continues to speak and make bubbly noises his eyes on his father eager to have attention from him.
Deimos swallows taking a short step closer to me. It might have not been visible to any ordinary wolf but I am his mate and that step was taken in light. Gritting my teeth I move to my right putting space between us. He closes his eyes shut not in defeat but disappointment. Disappointment in himself.
Silence consumes us on our walk until he strikes through it. “How have you been feeling these days? Is there something you need? For you or Kal?” He questions his eyes on me.
“I am doing good. I do not need anything. Thank you, Alpha.” I reply. His movements halt with a painful suddenness. His jaw clenches whilst his eyes plunge into the ground.
I keep walking forward walking to the location where wolves patiently wait for us. “Do not call me that, Lumina. I am your male. I am yours.” He spits with pain that tears him apart from within.
“Isn’t this what you wanted when we first met? For me to call you by your title. For me to treat you as such. I am merely being obedient to your wishes and commands, Alpha.” I reply to my voice cold and unfeeling. It is not an act I put on I show him my truth and that is what makes him bleed.
“I am your male, Lumina. I am your male.” He keeps whispering soft whines break free from his wolf calling out to mine from behind me as if he doesn’t know anymore if I see him in such light. His confidence, his never-dying faith in our relationship, in my heartfelt feelings towards him is failing. He is afraid. He is swimming in the depth of fear one he cannot seem to escape from. He is bound to this fear.
Not replying to his inner calling I greet my females with open arms and a wide smile. They bow deeply their palm upon their chests.
“We are so excited about this. We have been patient for two months have we not?” One of my females’ questions.
“I apologize.” Is all I answer them. I do not know what else to say. The truth? I cannot do so.
The crowd makes way and Deimos emerges from within Kal held tight in his arms. The excitement he held in his eyes dead replaced by misery. The misery caused by my words. He walks confidently head raised spine straight chest puffed with pride as he carries his male.
The pack cheers many females crying with joy of the next Alpha. He strides until he comes to stand to my left. He raises his left palm into the air as a sign for the pack to quieten and they do so immediately.
“I apologize for being this late. It is my fault as to why Kal is being introduced so late. My female told me to introduce him earlier but I opposed to the idea for I wanted my newborn to calm and my female to accustom to her new role.” He says his voice carrying through the crowd. My eyes widen as they snap to his side and look up at him. He took the blame. He took the blame for me.
Deimos removes his shirt swiftly his chest bare as well as strips his male off the blanket and clothes as the day he was born. His left hand under my male’s head right hand under Kal’s bum Deimos lifts him into the air. The pack immediately bows on one knee some with their head pressed onto the forest floor. “I present to you, my male. Kal the future Alpha of Alpha’s.” Deimos screams, his voice loud and powerful scaring the birds off the tree branches.
The females begin to sway side to side a low hum vibrating through their chests. My females watch on and begin a song of welcoming. Two traditions of a pack are being followed mixed together as one. The males stomp their feet and bang their chests with fists as their eyes regard my male. Goosebumps overwhelm my skin. Such a beautiful moment is revealed to my eyes.
I shiver as Deimos moves Kal to every direction towards the pack. They bow deeper as my male is pushed towards them. Once he showed everyone Deimos places him on the small wooden crib in the middle of the pack ground. “You may come to familiarize yourself with him now.”
A line is formed quickly and the elders are the first to come forward. They bend into the crib sniffing Kal’s scent some making sure he takes in theirs. Kal begins to wail his lungs out tears streaming down his plump cheeks uncomfortable with the unending new scents he is receiving. This is a common reaction of newborn pups when introduced to the pack.
Deimos struggles to remain calm and collected. He clenches his fist holding onto his wrist tightly forcing himself to remain still for all he wishes is to go comfort his crying male and remove him from the situation. Kal calls out not to me but his father, this we both know.
The next is the old females who mourned the death of the female of sin. I take a quick step towards Kal, my motherly instinct to protect overpowering every thought. A step taken without hesitation without concern on how it may look to them.
They all frown at my action taking it as an immense sign of disrespect. One of them takes a quick footstep towards me her eyes striking into mine with an angered fierceness whilst she bares her fangs a low snarl of warning thrown at me. She shows me her disapproval of me, she shows me of my unworthiness in her eyes for I killed the female of sin. I spat on their tradition. I knew this was coming.
My wolf surges wanting to put this female down for this female thinks highly of herself. I need to put her in place. I need to teach her… no all of these females who holds the power. The respect the elders held for me seems to be diminishing with every new wolf who takes a stance at me.
My breathing heavy fury rising I try to calm my wolf, we cannot spoil Kal’s ceremony. I need to think of him. I cannot make wolves talk bad about this day. It is a special day.