Emily
To express my satisfaction, I let out a sigh. Following our steamy session in the conservatory, Mathew had me brought upstairs for a nice, long soak in the tub. Using his deep, rumbling voice, he had washed and combed my hair while telling me how lovely and beautiful I was.
When Nicola got home, I was at my most at ease, tucked up against Mathew on the sofa watching Arrested Development. It seems that Mathew preferred comedies, whereas Nicola was more into serialized dramas. I appreciated their company on the sofa more than the show itself, although I did like them both.
When Nicola came into the media room, I gave him a warm smile. When he saw me in Mathew’s arms, he smirked.
Then he inquired, “Did you have a nice day, Sweetheart?” as he drew nearer to me. He sat on the other side of me and put his arm over me, kissing me briefly.
I responded with real joy, “Wonderful, thanks.”
While I really enjoyed my one-of-a-kind day with Mathew, I found myself longing for Nicola towards the end of it. My feelings for him were different from my feelings for Mathew, but no less powerful. Both of them intended to show me love, but in different ways. Right away, I was able to grasp it. Both Mathew and Nicola required my undivided allegiance and my willingness to submit.
For the first time in days, I found myself thinking about Mathew’s sketch. Nicola’s towering figure behind me, rope in hand, caused my cheeks to flush and my sex drive to rev up.
Nicola’s lips crinkled up at the corner in a knowing grin that warmed my heart.
“Honey, what are you pondering?”
I gave an honest response and said, “Matthew’s sketching.” There was no longer any sense of shame. To be honest, I felt no embarrassment about my sexual reaction to the picture. I had no guilt in admitting that I had feelings for both Nicola and Matthew.
“the one of you tying me up.”
“Is that something…?” My throat felt dry, and I swallowed. “Do you really want that? ”
His bright blue eyes looked at me seriously. “Only if you really want it.”
My hair was obscuring my face, so Mathew brushed it off. He informed me, “Nicola enjoys playing with his toys.”
“But we promise not to do anything that may possibly upset you. ”
There was a movement on my part in the seat. “I’m not sure whether I like it or not. That has been all I can think about. ”
Mathew remarked to Nicola, “I told you.”
It’s true what you said. Nicola reached out and held my hand, without taking his eyes off of me. “My first assumption was that those drawings would frighten you. The last thing I wanted to do was force you to do anything. But, yeah, I would want that. ”
“It’s something you need,” Mathew said.
I never took my gaze off of Nicola’s. So, “What do you mean?” Now I could see why Mathew was so desperate, but I still couldn’t put my finger on why Nicola found controlling me so satisfying. When he finally overcame me, I could see the twisted delight in his eyes. So that I might comprehend him like I do Mathew, this man needed to be comprehended.
With a deep sigh of relief, Nicola let out a mighty sigh of relief. He repeated an old confession, “You know I don’t want the life I have.”
” I couldn’t help it, Emily. I’m just a product of being a human in this environment. I can’t make any decisions right now. ” I always follow my dad’s orders. Insanely, I still feel bad about letting him down every time I let him down.
“My friend Nicola and I had more in common than I had given ourselves credit for. Like me, he felt the weight of trying to live up to his father’s expectations. That longing was what had shackled him to a past and a future he despised. ”
“In truth, my father’s ambition to send me to Lasvagas was more of a dream than my own. My father had strongly discouraged me from majoring in Art History, but despite his disapproval, I had chosen that path. He had hoped that I would follow in his footsteps and pursue a career in psychology. He had made it clear that he did not approve of my decision and that he would withdraw his love if I did not go with his recommendation. A change of study was something I pondered. ”
But then, I’d met Nicola. He’d praised me for pursuing my passion over practicality. He’d allowed me to give myself permission to make the choice I wanted rather than cracking under my father’s emotional blackmail.
In the same way, Nicola felt helpless. He needed to exert his dominance over me for that reason. To compensate for his lack of control in every other area of his life, he needed to feel in charge whenever we were together.
I finally worked up the courage to say, “I want to try,”.
” I’m referring to the rope. I’m intrigued and want to give it a shot. ”
The fire of desire shone brightly in Nicola’s eyes. “Are you positive, Honey?”