He didn’t want to go, but his friends had been begging him to get out of the cabin and go around town with them for the past week. They wanted to ride in his new car and hang out where everyone was going to be that night, the Town Hall. He dragged himself out there, knowing full well he was going to bump in with Charlie and her boyfriend. He tried to stay low key, sitting in the corners where it’s least visible from the crowds.
He was a different guy now, small town folks talked a lot and news spread fast. He was a guy who worked in the big city, came back with a brand new car, and single. The girls in the neighborhood flocked to greet him, even if it’s just to say ‘hi’ and see if he’s interested in them. They gathered up around him just to listen to his Goldstone stories, dreaming of a big city life that seemed so far out of reach for most of them.
When she passed with her arm looped around her boyfriend, it’s as if there was a beaming light above her head that immediately made him turn to look. Wherever they were, no matter how crowded the place, they always seemed to find each other and their eyes would always meet. He didn’t like the way it felt seeing her in another man’s arm. She didn’t like the way she felt looking at him surrounded by admiring eyes. They looked away.
They tried to go about their way in the event, but it was too hard to avoid. They kept passing each other’s way. Neither of them wanted to greet one another, so they kept turning around to find another way, only to find each other again at another turn. “Can we go home now?” Charlene asked Landon. “But we’ve only been here for an hour?” “I’m tired … I just wanna go home,” she was tugging his sleeve.
Tommy was watching from where he was sitting with his friends. She was pulling him in a way, like a little girl begging for an ice cream. His stomach clenched, even when she was acting spoiled, he wanted to be the one she was acting out to. It took awhile for her to persuade Landon until he finally agreed to go. She didn’t look like she was enjoying her night at all. Little did he know, she wanted to leave early because of his presence.
She pushed Landon away when he tried to make out with her in the car. “Landon … I just wanna go home, please just take me home,” she was frowning in the passenger seat. “What’s wrong with you today?” he was losing his patience with her.
She sighed, “Nothing … I’m just not in the mood,” she said.
“Fine!” he drove out of the parking lot and made a screech as he turned. He drove her home quite quickly. They didn’t say a word all the way back.
All she wanted was to lock herself in her room and brood, but first, she had to get rid of Landon. He was expecting a sweet end of a very tiring day for him. He drove all the way from Gastonburry that morning just to be there for her. “I’m sorry about today, I don’t know why I’m so tired … I think I just need more sleep,” she made an excuse to end the night early.
He put his hand on her bedroom door, “Alright … I guess I need some sleep too … don’t I get a good night kiss?” he asked with a flirty smile.
He was technically her boyfriend at the time, even though she had mixed emotions about it. She leaned forward and kissed him, her intention was to keep it short and sweet but he lingered. He pushed her into the bedroom, slowly but surely until he was inside and closed the door. “What are you doing? I thought we were going to get some rest?” she really wasn’t in the mood for more than a goodnight kiss.
“Sure … we can do it together here, right?” he kept kissing her on her neck, back to her lips. His hands started to rubbed her back, down to her waist and pulled out her shirt and put his hands under it.
He pushed him gently, “I’m really tired … I don’t wanna do this.” He unhooked her bra and started fondling with her breasts, he was hoping she would change her mind with a little persuasion.
“Come on, Charlene, it’ll be quick and we’ll be sleeping ’till noon after that,” his hands were busy groping her in all the places she didn’t want to be touched.
She grabbed his hands and pulled them away, “Not tonight, Landon, I mean it,” she sounded curtly.
He looked at her sharply, she can see he was annoyed. “Really?? I haven’t seen you in two months and you’re rejecting me?” She didn’t answer.
“Don’t you miss me? I’ve been thinking about this day ever since I left the last time … maybe you just need a little stimulation, some girls are kinda hard to be ready,” he was determined to get it that night. He tried to kiss her again, but she looked the other way. It pushed him over the edge. He grabbed her face and turned it to face him, and he kissed her. He pushed her onto the bed but before she fell back, she used all her strength to push him away and slapped him.
He was shocked from the sore on his face, “What the fuck is wrong with you?! You just slapped me?!” he screamed.
“I said, No, Landon! You were forcing me!” she defended herself.
“I was trying to kiss you! I was kissing my girlfriend! And you slapped me!” he was putting the blame on her. “Can we just not do this tonight? Can’t you take ‘no’ for an answer?” she told him loudly. Before he could burst out into anger, there was a knock on the door.
“Charlene? Are you in there?” her mom was calling from the outside. They both looked at each other, she was saved by the knock, but he was not done with her yet.
“Yeah, mom, I’m in here!” she tucked in her shirt after hooking back her bra.
“Can I come in?” her mom asked. Landon was tidying up himself with a long face.
“Yes, mom, you can come in,” Charlene said.
“Oh … Landon … you’re in here? I didn’t know you were home so early,” Catherine greeted them with her usual glow.
“It’s been a long day … I think I’ll be retiring too for the evening … I’m going back to my room, good night Mrs. Ludlow, good night, Charlene,” he tried to sound and act as casual as possible. Charlene was holding her breath until he was finally out of her room. She sighed in relief as she closed the door behind him.
“I heard shouting, is everything alright?” Catherine asked. She walked over and hugged her mother, she was incredibly grateful for the interruption.
“It’s nothing … we had a little fight,” she thought she could handle the situation.
“Did he do something to upset you?” Catherine wasn’t satisfied with her daughter’s answer.
Charlene let go of her embrace and shook her head, “Nothing I can’t handle,” she said.
“Are you sure?” Catherine insisted. Charlene nodded.
Catherine sat on the bed as she watched her daughter change into a nightgown. “Is it still weighing on your mind?” she asked her. Charlene wasn’t sure what her mom meant. “That boy … I saw him outside the school gates this morning.”
Charlene was speechless, she sat beside her mom and exhaled. “He was at the Town Hall too … we tried to avoid each other, but …” she didn’t finish her sentence.
Catherine rubbed her hair, “You can kiss any boy you want, tell them what they want to hear … or even something you want to believe … but it always comes down to how you really feel … it never lies,” she said.
“I’m a more practical person .. . I guess … when it comes to relationships … I see it more as a business partnership, especially when it’s long term … like marriage,” Catherine chuckled in the irony.
“How do you mean?” Charlene was puzzled by her mom’s statement. “I ignored my feelings most of the time, I chose not to struggle with emotions, I chose practicality … hence a nice big house in a small town with a team of employees where I can raise my children in peace, sipping tea every afternoon as the lady of the house to a man who has a good position and a good income as a husband,” she explained elaborately.
Charlene turned to look at her mom, she creased her eyebrows, “You mean … you don’t love dad?”
Catherine smiled, “I do … I love him for providing me with a good life, giving me two wonderful children, I love him for giving me everything I need and more … but I also know about that woman he’s been seeing in Gastonburry,” the last part had shocked Charlene and made her gasped.
“Yeah … I know about your dad’s girlfriend … the only reason why he’s with her is because he couldn’t find the kind of love he needed from me … and I feel numb about it … he will always come back here to me, because that’s what he really wants … but I’m not sure that’s what I want … do you know what I mean?” Catherine was opening up for the first time to Charlene who had never seen her mother in a different light.
“I’m not sure I know what you mean, mom,” she was much too young to understand the complexity of love in the real sense of it.
“I’m just saying … if you follow your head … chances are, you’ll have a nice life, fulfilled in every way, except that hollow space in your heart that’ll grow numb in time … but if you follow your heart … well … I can’t say much about that, because I’ve never met a boy with ice-blue eyes who looked at me like I’m the best thing that ever happened to him,” she laughed at the thought.
“What do you think I should do, mom?” she asked.
Catherine took a deep breath, “I think you should make up your mind, to do what you really want to do in your heart … be the best you can be … so you can provide yourself with everything you need in life … then you’ll be free to be with whoever your heart comes home to,” she said.
Charlene thought about it for a moment, “That sounds like very good advice … ”
“That is something I should’ve done for myself … but that chance had passed for me, maybe you should try it and see if that’ll work out for you,” her mom said and kissed her forehead. Her mom said good night and left her to ponder her words. After she left the bedroom, Charlene locked the door behind her.