“Here … I’ve marked everything you need to read and write the report on it,” Hazel handed Marlon the history book.
He sighed and took the book from her hand, he lifted an eyebrow, “World War II, wow … so much fun …” his voice was flat.
She scoffed, “Well, that’s not all, you still have the Sociology daily test but we can go through that later … I have to go now, ’cause Lee is picking me up for dinner.”
His eyes narrowed as he looked at her suspiciously, “Are you back with him?”
She smiled shyly looking giddy as ever, “I don’t think we were really broken up, maybe I misunderstood him … but … it’s not like we’re …” she exhaled deeply, “I don’t know … it’s complicated.”
“Hmm …” he was listening though his eyes were looking at the pages of the history book in his hands. “Maybe he just wants to have lots of sex before he goes celibate in the camp,” he commented.
“What? No … we haven’t …” she almost blurted it out but changed her mind.
Marlon looked at her surprised, “You guys hadn’t done it yet? Are you serious?”
She blushed, it was a topic she rarely discussed with anyone except Jan. “I wanted to … but …” she remembered how her body reacted to him the last time they kissed in his car. “He’s leaving … so I’m torn …” she didn’t plan to share so much about it with him, but there’s something about Marlon that made her feel comfortable.
Marlon threw himself on the sofa next to her, “Guys are all about sex, baby,” he took the cigarette that was hanging over his ear and lit it. “Lots and lots and lots of sex,” he chuckled. “Anything that can help him get off is fair game.”
“Is that how you see it?” she looked at him curious. She heard the same thing so many times, but she didn’t see that from Lee. That was one of the reason why she fell so hard for him.
Marlon nodded, blew a smoke out from his pouty lips, “Uhm … hmm … and your boyfriend is no exception.”
“I don’t think Lee is like that,” she defended him.
Marlon laughed, “He’s good in hiding it then … or he’s just too nice to tell you that he’s horny as fuck … but believe me baby, he wants it as much as the next guy.”
Coming from a guy, it was a confirmation. She had only heard these things from her girlfriends, she never even really talked about it with Lee. There were a few times they were close to doing it, but when she changed her mind, Lee never tried to convince her otherwise. Maybe he was too nice, she thought.
“Do you think I should do it?” she couldn’t believe she just asked him after she heard it.
He scratched his head with a grimace, no one had ever asked him that before. “If you had to ask me … that means you’re not sure … so no, I think you shouldn’t do it,” he said.
He had a point. Doing it for the first time is a big deal for her, as much as she wanted to, it was scary too.
“Some girls are curious, they just want to know how it feels like … is that what you’re thinking?” he continued.
“No …” she answered immediately. “I know it’s going to be amazing … with the right person … I hate to think that it’s just something I do out of curiosity, I want it to be meaningful, special … you know?”
He fell silent, “First times are sloppy … most people I know say that their first time was awkward, weird, and experimental … never amazing,” he laughed lightly.
“Was it like that for you?”
“Are you really asking me about the first time I had sex?” he was surprised with her question.
“No, I’m sorry,” she patted his shoulder, “I didn’t mean to pry … since we were in the topic …” she laughed realizing how private her question was.
“Okay … I’ll tell you … but only if you’ll tell me about yours …” he looked at her in the eyes. “Eventually …” he added.
She thought about it for a moment, “Okay … I don’t mind … I don’t know when that will be anyway …” she laughed nervously.
“Right … well …” he took a deep breath, “I was 15 … she was 19.”
Hazel raised her brows.
“Yeup … she was one of the girls in our team, we work together for the channel … it wasn’t her first time, that’s for sure,” he scoffed, “We were at one of our parties, we were drunk … she took me up to one of the bedrooms and she locked the door … she sat on the bed and asked me if I wanted her to go down on me …” he took a drag of his cigarette.
“I was shocked, I mean, she was hot … the guys have always talked about how hot she was and to think that she wanted to do that with me was …,” he paused as if remembering how it was, “So I said ‘yeah’ … and then she did it, she led my hand to her and told me to rub her … and half way … when I got really hard … she told me to stick it in her … well … not exactly those words, but you know what I mean?” Marlon was getting embarrassed with the details.
Hazel was listening, she couldn’t help but think something is not right with that story.
“I had no idea what I was doing but … it felt good … she was guiding me, telling me to do this and that ’cause I think I did it all wrong,” he chuckled, “The next thing I know, I was coming like a fire hose,” he laughed, “And she said she wasn’t done yet and she wanted me to go down on her until she’s done … I didn’t know how to do that either … but I did it, she was moaning and telling me what to do, I was afraid someone could hear us … and after she came, she was having fun by herself ’cause I just stood there and watched, didn’t know what to do …” he laughed and rubbed his face.
“And then she put on her clothes and said ‘thanks’ and she told me to watch porn and left me there to clean after us,” he put off his cigarette and there was a sad look in his eyes. Marlon knew it too, it wasn’t how his first time suppose to be.
“She used you,” Hazel finally said.
He shrugged, “Yeah, well … she was hot, so I guess it was a good thing for a 15-year-old to lose it with a hot chick older than him, right?” He didn’t look convinced with his own statement.
Hazel sighed, “Did you ever tell anyone about it?”
“No,” he shook his head, “You’re the first one.”
“I never knew anyone who’d done it with someone other than their girlfriend or boyfriend … did you date her after that?”
Marlon looked at her for a moment before answering, “No … we did again a few times after that, then … she did it with other guys, I did it with other girls …” he shrugged, “It’s just sex … everyone’s doing it.”
She was learning something new about how other people viewed sex. She had always held a certain value over it, and to see that her peers took it very lightly made her doubt herself.