Her face falls. “Joshua,” she whispers. “I love you.”
I quickly look away from her. I don’t want to hear this.
She stands and walks over to the window. “What did Natasha say about this?”
My eyes meet Cameron’s-here we go. “She has said nothing only that I should talk to you,” I reply in a monotone.
She fakes a smile. “She must be loving this-driving a wedge between me and my boys. It’s what she has always wanted.”
I inhale deeply. I knew she would try and turn this against Natasha.
“This has nothing to do with Natasha, Mother! How dare you bring her into this?” Cameron yells.
My eyes meet his and I silently thank him. He’s with me on this.
“Start talking,” I sneer.
On cue she starts to cry and Cameron covers his face. He can’t stand it when women get upset-he’s just not wired that way.
I stand still watching her, void of emotion.
Cameron stands and goes to her. “Please don’t cry,” he whispers as he pulls her into an embrace. “Tell us what’s going on,” he whispers.
“It’s terrible. This whole situation is just terrible,” she sobs into Cameron’s shoulder.
I sit for five minutes while she gets herself together and finally she takes a seat on the lounge and Cameron sits next to her and takes her hand in his. He’s such a soft touch.
“When I was twenty-one and after I had Scott…” she pauses.
“Yes,” he whispers.
“I… it… was a very difficult time for me.”
I should have more empathy for her but I just don’t. I lean on the desk with my arms folded in front of me.
“Your father was away for months at a time and had lost interest in me. I was quite sure he was involved with another woman and his heart was somewhere else.”
My stomach drops.
“Go on,” Cameron whispers.
“I had a friend that would come to the house and check on Scott and me.” Her eyes rise and meet mine. “Don’t hate me, Joshua,” she sobs.
I drop my head.
“His marriage had ended and we relied on each other for support. Your father was away for four months.”
I feel sick to my stomach and my eyes close in pain as I imagine the scenario she is setting.
“After much resistance I fell in love with this man and we began an intimate affair.”
Cameron pulls his hand from hers and she drops her head.
“I thought he loved me. I was going to leave your father for him,” she sobs.
The room is silent except for the sound of her crying.
“How long?” I say in monotone.
“Six weeks,” she whispers.
More silence…She sobs. “I told him of my plans to leave your father, but he was outraged and told me that he didn’t love me and not to be a fool-it was just sex to him.”
I rub my hands through my hair as nausea fills me.
She starts to cry uncontrollably. “I was crushed. I had thrown my marriage vows away on a man who didn’t love me. I ended it immediately.”
She becomes inconsolable and starts to really cry and I can see Cameron’s heart breaking with every tear that she sheds.
“Go on,” I reply.
“When Robert came back he admitted that he had been having an affair and that he wanted to start again. I was so grateful to be given another chance.”
My eyes watch her as my fury starts to reignite.
“We knew we had problems but were determined to work them out for the sake of Scott. We were so young, Joshua. We made mistakes. Both of us, your father and me.”
I stand and go to the window behind my desk and look out onto the pool area. I just want this conversation over.
“Eight weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I had always worn condoms with this man so I knew it couldn’t be his. I was overjoyed. I was being given a second chance with my husband.”
Cameron’s eyes meet mine as my eyes cloud over. We both know what this means. I drop back into my seat as pain starts to fill me. I’m not a Stanton.
“Joshua, remember when you were seventeen and you fell off the horse?” she asks.
I nod through my glassy eyes.
“You cut your leg deeply on the fence and you lost a lot of blood and needed a blood transfusion.”
I nod with my head dropped.
“The doctors came to me and told me that you had a very rare blood type and that there was no physical possibility that you could be your father’s child.”
Cameron stands immediately and comes around behind me and places both of his hands on my shoulders in support.
I’m not a Stanton.
“Joshua, I didn’t know what to do. Your father and I were finally so happy, and we had worked so damn hard to get to that place. How could I break a young boy’s heart, Joshua?”