Joshua narrows his eyes at Ben who gives me a quick nod. I can tell he was impressed with what I just said and I smile broadly, feeling very proud of myself. We walk up towards the car museum at the end of the hall.
“Now I am going upstairs to find Bridget.” I smile.
Ben’s eyes flick to mine as he opens the door.
“Want me to fix up a dinner date Ben, just the two of you?” I throw him a wink and smile broadly. “I can book a romantic restaurant.” I hunch my shoulders like a little kid. I am so matchmaking these two.
Ben shakes his head sarcastically as he rolls his eyes.
“Son of a fucking bitch!” Joshua yells from in front of us.
I spin around to see what he is talking about and there are empty spaces at the back of the garage closest to the door.
“Christ,” Ben mutters. “Four cars are missing.”
My eyes widen… oh crap.
It’s eight-thirty and Joshua is still with the police and Ben as they go over the crime scene, the girls are somewhere downstairs and Adrian has gone home. We are all exhausted and I am in my room waiting for my love. He’s had a bad day and the weight is being felt throughout the silent house. I need to talk to Cameron alone about this Margaret nightmare and now might be the time. I walk down to the west wing of the house until I find his bedroom and knock quietly on the door.
“Come in,” he yells.
I tentatively walk in and look around. His room is large. The walls are dark grey and the bed is a huge four-poster. My eyes are drawn to the red ropes and tassels on the four posts… Cameron’s into bondage. Acting casual I look around the rest of the room. It has its own lounge area off to the side, where he is watching television in boxer shorts on one of the armchairs. He cranes his neck to see who it is. I can see the disappointment when he realises it’s me.
“Hi,” I say nervously.
“What’s up?” he replies as his eyes flick back to the television.
Oh god, can’t he be more friendly. “I was just wondering if we could talk,” I reply quietly. “I know you’re mad with me and I understand why because I’m mad with myself.”
His eyes meet mine. “Sit down,” he replies, defeated.
I twist a small piece of material on the front of my T-shirt as I try to think what to say.
“Cam, I’m sorry. I should have told you that day in the hospital,” I whisper.
His eyes meet mine and he nods.
I feel my heart drop. I love Cameron and we haven’t been the same since he and I had those harsh words over Joshua in the hospital that day when Gran was sick. I feel my tears swell. “Cameron, I know you resent the fact that I love your brother.”
He screws up his face. “Tash, I don’t resent the fact you love Joshua. I wouldn’t want him to be with anyone else.”
“Why have you been weird with me?” I ask through my tears.
He just looks at me blankly.
“Cam, please can we talk, I am going to marry your brother and I can’t have this underlying animosity coming from you. It hurts me.” He shakes his head. “Don’t cry, Tash,” he replies gently.
I pull a really ugly face as the lump hurts my throat.
“I watched my brother nearly die and you wouldn’t even talk to him and…” He shakes his head as he tries to articulate what he wants to say.
I nod sadly. “I know, Cameron, but I had to let him go so that he could see if he loved Amelie.”
He shakes his head. “I don’t buy that, Tash. I would never let someone go if I loved them.”
I smile sadly. “Cameron, one day you will love someone more than yourself and you will do anything to give them a chance at real, deep happiness. I died a little every day I was away from him,” I murmur.
He looks at me sadly as he thinks and goes to say something but then stops himself.
“What were you going to say?” I ask.
He thinks for a moment. “Were your parents like you and Josh?”
I frown, not understanding. “What do you mean?” I ask.
“Were they, like, crazy in love with each other like you and Joshua are?”
I smile and nod sadly. “Yes,” I whisper.
He sits back in his seat as he thinks and I see confusion on his face.
“Were yours?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “No, not at all.”
I sit back as I understand the meaning of his question. He has never been around a couple like Joshua and me. He thinks this is abnormal.
“Cameron, there are too many mediocre things in life already… love shouldn’t be one of them.”
He nods sadly. “I guess,” he replies.
“And just because your parents are not over-the-top affectionate doesn’t mean they don’t love each other.”
He stares off into space somewhere, deep in thought.
“What is it?” I ask.
“Have you ever been so deeply deceived that it makes you question if everything you thought you ever knew is a lie?”
“Not really Cam.”
He looks back at me and I know he didn’t expect that answer.
“The thing is, when Joshua slept with Amelie… deep down I knew it was coming. He had feelings for her and I had expected it all along on some unconscious level,” I reply.
He frowns at me.
“Cam, it’s not a bad thing. Amelie is beautiful and smart. I probably would have picked her if I was Joshua to be truthful.” I widen my eyes at him.
Cameron smirks. “Well, you do hate horses.”
I giggle and nod. “That’s true. I definitely do.”
“Joshua did the right thing sleeping with her and, to be honest, I am really glad he did because now I don’t have any doubt that we are going to make it. I’m not insecure or jealous and he is better for it too because now he knows for certain that I am the one,” I reply.
He smiles and holds out his hand to me in a peace offering and I take it in mine.
“Cam, I promise you as long as I draw breath I will never hurt your brother again.”
We sit still on the lounge, holding hands, and I can sense he still needs to talk.
“Can I ask you a question, off the record?” he asks.
I nod sadly because I already know what it is.
“Do you think my mother is going to deny having an affair?”