Last night I wracked my brain all night about that text on New Year’s. Did he send it from Cameron’s phone? Is that true, does he still love me? Maybe Adrian sent it playing match-maker. Only one way to find out. Test him and, boy, is he going to be tested. I undo my top button. I’m feeling more myself today, more confident. I think I had an epiphany in the shower this morning. Finally-it’s only taken six painful months. I have had enough of trying to hold us together. If he really doesn’t care, why should I? Next time Jesten asks me out, I’m going. Stuff it, stuff him.
I walk down the corridor and see everyone sitting in a group, their backs to me. Bridget turns and sees me first, her eyes widen and she smirks a knowing smile. You got it sister, I’m back.
I walk up gracefully and take out my phone. “Hi,” I smile at the group.
Cameron smiles. “Hi Tash.”
“Hi,” the others collectively say.
Joshua looks up the length of my body and snaps his eyes away angrily. Robert walks over and puts his arm around me. “How is my beautiful Natasha today?” he smiles broadly.
I smile. “Good thanks, back at my new job today. Glad to return to some normalcy.”
“New job?” He frowns. “Where are you working now?”
I smile and from the corner of my eye see Joshua’s head snap back to me. “I have left the Sexual Psychology Clinic. I now work in the hospital system, just regular psychology.”
He smiles. “Really.”
Cameron butts in. “Wow Tash, big move. What made you move from what you were doing?”
I shrug. “Sick to death of dealing with infidelity and broken relationships.”
My eyes flick to Bridget and she winks at me. Take that, asshole.
My phone rings. I got one less problem without you. I got one less problem without you.
“Excuse me Robert.” I pull away to answer my phone as I look at the screen. Abbie, let’s play one of her charades. Game on.
“Hello, Natasha Marx,” I purr as I hold my finger up to Robert.
I walk away from the group and fake laugh.
“What are you doing?” Abbie snaps.
“Being you,” I smile.
“What?”
“I’m doing a little market research, seeing if you know who is still interested or not,” I whisper as I turn away from the group and face the window.
“Oh my god. Loving it sick. Fake laugh, make him think you are talking to a guy.”
I frown. “Oh god, so desperate,” I whisper.
“Trust me, this shit works.” She giggles. I laugh out loud. “Now make sure he can hear you and say yes you will see me on Saturday night if you’re there because you don’t know what you are doing yet, but thanks for the invite.”
“What, that’s ridiculous,” I whisper as I frown.
“Just say it,” she snaps.
I turn and walk back to the group, on the way saying, “I’m not sure yet. I might see you Saturday night. Thanks for the invite. Bye.” Oh shit, I stuffed it up. My phone immediately beeps a text and I stop mid-step to check it.
It’s Bridget.
Joshua just cracked his neck at you.
I smirk and take a seat. One can never underestimate the power of a naughty secretary outfit. I sit opposite Bridget and she smirks at me. I look away so I don’t laugh or high-five her or something equally ridiculous.
Robert stands. “This weekend all of Mum’s friends are coming from everywhere, so you kids have the weekend off. We can’t take up the whole waiting area, go out and blow off some steam. After you see her tonight, don’t come back until Monday.” Everybody nods solemnly. My heart drops-I won’t see him all weekend. Bridget must be able to read my mind.
“Tash, Abbs and I are going to the Ivy tomorrow night. Why don’t you all come?” she asks innocently.
Cameron and Wilson nod. “Yeah, ok.”
“I’m busy,” Joshua snaps.
This is backfiring. I pretend not to care and take out my wallet and for a distraction I walk over to the coke machine to get a bottle of water. Joshua leans back on his chair and throws his arm along its back in annoyance. His eyes scan down the length of my body and he cracks his neck again.
Ha, got you. You are still attracted to me. I take the lid off my water, put my hand on my hip and put my head back to take a sip, deliberately licking my lips. Yep, now I’m acting like some loser off a coke ad, but who cares? Joshua’s eyes run down the length of my body again and back up to my face. This time he doesn’t even pretend not to be aroused. His eyes penetrate mine-he’s giving me that look. The one I love, fuck me it screams, and boy it’s smoking hot. I can start to feel the heat from his stare burning a hole in my shirt, through my underpants. Oh god, I need some serious … it’s been a long time. I start to hear my pulse in my ears.
Everybody else in the room has disappeared and just as I picture myself walking over, hitching up my skirt and straddling the magnificent beast, I am brought back to the present.
“Tash, Gran wants to see you and Joshua together,” Mum smiles. My eyes snap to her as I pull out of my fantasy.
“Huh?” I frown.
“She specifically asked to see you two together.”
My eyes shoot to Joshua and he runs his tongue over the front of his top teeth, his angry sign. He stands in a rush and walks to the door.
He turns to me. “Coming,” he snaps as he raises his eyebrows.
Oh shit, I swallow the lump in my throat and we walk together tentatively into Gran’s room where she lies peacefully in her bed surrounded by flowers. She smiles when she sees me and holds out her hand affectionately. I grab it and smile as I kiss the back of it.
Oh Gran, I love you. My eyes fill with tears at the reality of this situation. How many more times will I get to see her? Spend time with her, laugh with her?
We both gently kiss her on the cheek.
“Are you ok Gran?” I whisper.
“I want you two to make an old lady happy,” she whispers as she smiles.
I nod. “Yes, Gran, of course.”
“I know you two are desperately in love. I want you to both stop this ludicrous charade and get back together.”
My eyes widen and Joshua shakes his head. “Gran,” he whispers.
Oh no, what’s he going to say? He might upset her. I can’t stand it. I butt in. “It’s ok, Gran. Joshua and I are working it out-we are trying to get back together.” He narrows his eyes at me and shakes his head.
She smiles broadly. “Really, I didn’t know. This is great news. I knew it. I always knew you would find your way back to each other,” she whispers.
I walk over to Joshua and put my arm around him to cement my story. Crap, he feels good. Why does he feel so damn good? Warm and hard, I feel my body soften with arousal.