When Brent left, and I was left alone in his life, I unintentionally remembered everything about the two of us. I couldn’t help but think that if we were the right age back then, maybe we could have stood by our love for each other.
Perhaps if we were both more mature at that time, our relationship would have had a chance to work out. But my “what if’s” about Brent are pointless now. He already has Michelle, and Samer still owns my heart.
Before Brent became my friend and boyfriend, my world revolved around Kevin. It’s funny to think that the guy I once dreamed of turned out to be the one who betrayed me. Speaking of Kevin, we still haven’t talked in person, but Rhea told him that she forgave him.
Since I was bored, I decided to look through the photo albums under the center table. I found Brent’s album containing pictures of him from his elementary days. I couldn’t help but laugh at his awkward poses. His photo album was bursting with cuteness overload, and I just shook my head. Maybe I was easily swayed by his good looks, which is why I fell for him so quickly.
I kept scolding myself as I remembered how weak I was. I kissed Brent so quickly! You’re so flirty, girl, I told myself. I continued looking at the album when my cellphone rang. It was Brent calling, so I answered right away.
“This is Jamie, speaking!” I cheerfully greeted Brent.
“Your Arab boyfriend is very angry, Jamie, and he’s dragging all of us into it,” Brent said on the other line.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“He’s in a bad mood because he found out that you didn’t come home last night,” Brent said.
“And did you tell him where I am now?” I suddenly worried that Brent might be a traitor too.
“Of course not! But it might be better if you go get your things. He even threatened to report your disappearance to the police station,” Brent said.
As I listened to Brent’s words, I felt restless like an ant. It felt good to know that he was looking for me. I even felt beautiful while running my fingers through my hair.
“Let him be. I’ll just text him later; I need to find myself first,” I told Brent.
“Do you want me to help you find yourself? Maybe you’ll find me too,” the guy joked.
“Bye,” I said, and I immediately ended the call.
It’s not easy for me to stay at home because I’m used to working. I’ve almost looked at all of Brent’s photo albums, and I’ve already cooked some eggs for my lunch.
Since I was so bored, I thought of just taking a nap. I entered the room Brent lent me, and after turning on the AC unit, I immediately lay down. I closed my eyes, and that’s the last thing I remembered before embarking on the world of dreams.
Brent burst into laughter after I told him everything. “Is it really that funny?” I asked him.
“I find it funny because I remember when she arrived, she immediately asked me about countering a witch,” Brent said.
“How naïve,” I replied.
“You said it,” Brent answered. “Do you want to go to your village? I have a farm there near the water source,” Brent suggested.
“Oh yes, you mentioned your farm there before. Hmmm, what are we going to do there?” I asked him, not expecting that we would be going to the place where he got stabbed in my dream. Maybe it’s a sign, right?
“Just because,” Brent said.
“Okay, let’s go,” I said, and before leaving the house, I put on a helmet because I didn’t want anyone recognizing me. “Do you have a caretaker there?” I asked him.
“Yep, and we can have chicken cooked for our dinner. Wait, let me text Manang first,” Brent said, and I just nodded.
“I’m excited,” I said.
As we entered the rough road towards the water source, Brent slowed down a bit because the path was still slippery due to heavy rain yesterday. “Jamie, hold on tight. The road is slippery, and you know the situation here during the rainy season,” Brent said.
I didn’t reply because the situation wasn’t new to me. Dealing with slippery roads during the rainy season was a problem we had faced before. “Ayyy!” I screamed when Brent’s motorcycle almost skidded. “Take it easy, Brent! We might have an accident,” I advised him.
“Just hold on tight,” Brent said.
“What if I just get off and walk?” I suggested.
“I thought you were afraid of the dark,” Brent said to me.
“Yup, but I’m more afraid of having an accident!” I told him.
“Trust me, we won’t have an accident. I’ve got this!” Brent boasted again.
“You’re so full of yourself. Well, you’ll regret it if we do fall,” I warned him.
“Hmmmm, you look delicious, so no problem,” Brent said playfully, and I immediately pinched his side in response.
When we arrived at Brent’s chicken coop, we were greeted by an elderly woman and her husband. Brent greeted the two elders, and I greeted them as well. The woman said that our meal was not yet cooked, so Brent took me to a bamboo house.
“This is beautiful,” I marveled at the design of his house.
It had a very native feel. If I was amazed by the design of the bamboo house, I was even more astonished by the interior. Everything inside looked modern and was in stark contrast to the traditional appearance of the house from the outside.
“Do you like it?” the man asked, and I nodded in approval.
“I really do. But why did you choose to buy land for your chickens here?” I asked him.
“Hmmm, this place holds a lot of memories for me,” the man replied.
I averted my gaze from him because I suddenly felt uncomfortable with what he said. “So, do you sleep here whenever you’re around?” I changed the subject.
“Yep, we’ll sleep here tonight,” Brent said.
“Just the two of us?” I asked him because it felt awkward if it was just the two of us.
“The caretakers have their own sleeping quarters,” Brent answered.
I didn’t know if what we were doing was right or not, but I didn’t get a chance to say anything as we were called to have dinner.
As I enjoyed the flavorful chicken soup, I remembered my father who would always wait for me outside our house every morning to give me extra allowance for school.
“Why are you silent there? Is Mother Virgie’s cooked tinola really good?” Brent joked with me and the two adults laughed.
“I just remembered something,” I said.
“Who? Me?” Brent asked and I just shook my head.
After we ate, the two adults immediately said their goodbyes to rest. Of course, Brent and I agreed, but as Brent and I were going to the bamboo house where we would sleep, I was a little nervous.
I don’t know why I was nervous and I think Brent also noticed my anxiety so after he took me to the room to be used, he left immediately.
I’ve been lying down for a while but I can’t sleep. Every time I fall asleep, the events of the past come back to me. I stood up and went out. Slowly walked towards Brent’s room. I called his name because I was scared.
“Brent, are you asleep?” I asked the man.
“Why Jamie?” The man answered from inside.
Hearing his voice cheered me up. It’s a good thing he’s not asleep yet so I have someone to talk to.
“Because I can’t sleep, I’m scared Brent. You sleep in my room. The bed is big, I’m on the other side.” I wasn’t drunk but I didn’t understand myself why I invited him to the room I used.
“Alright, I’ll be next.” The man immediately agreed.
Fortunately, he agreed. I have no intention of creeping him out, I just want to sleep well. When Brent came in, I told him to lock the door.
“Brent, you are there, I am here.”
I was finally able to sleep comfortably because I had someone with me. Maybe Brent is the same because he is quiet.
But I didn’t fall asleep right away. Even though my eyes were closed, my spirit was still awake as if I was waiting for Brent to enter my room.
I heard the door open, he came in and closed the door. When he entered the mosquito net and lay down, my heart beat faster. What’s happening to me, Lord? Why am I attracted to him again? How is Samer?
I tried to hold back my feelings because it wasn’t right and a lot of people would be hurt. But my desire to hug him even more intensified. I don’t know what time it was but I woke up when the chickens were making noise. I didn’t move immediately, because how did it happen that Brent and I were touching each other.
As my heart and mind argued, I fell asleep.
But…
I don’t know what time it is. I just woke up because I felt heavy.
It’s Brent. One of his legs rested on my thigh. I tried to remove his leg but it was heavy and I was sure he would wake up if I used force.
I don’t want him to know that that happened because he might be ashamed of me the next day. I don’t want us to be awkward either. I don’t think I can ignore us anymore.
In the end, I just let him. And I tried to sleep again. But it’s hard!
Especially when one of his hands suddenly fell on my stomach. Was he really mischievous to sleep or did he do it on purpose?
I listened closely to his breathing. It’s normal like people who are really sleeping. What if I do to him what he did? I feel that Brent just likes me.
I waited for a moment before I made a move. Then I suddenly leaned over and hugged him with one of my hands.
I waited for him to remove my hand that was resting near his chest but he never did. Oh dead! I guess he was asleep and didn’t know what he did!
I was ashamed to take my hand from him because if the man was ever awake, he would think that I did what I did on purpose if I took it away right away.
In the end I fell asleep hugging him! Infairness, Brent’s smell is my type. Not the smell of soap or shampoo, but the smell of a man. Every breath I take I can smell his unique aroma which brings crazy sensation towards my womanhood.
I don’t know who the naughty one between the two of us is but I suddenly woke up when I felt Brent’s leg resting on top of my womanhood. Gosh! I’m at a loss as to what to do! But I should remove it because I’m afraid. Who would not?
I grabbed his leg and was about to remove it, but suddenly he rubbed it over my sleeping shorts. And I felt that my earthly body suddenly came to life!
“Brent…!” I called his name so that he willingly removed his leg because I knew that we had both woken up.
“Hmmm..” he just moaned as if he agreed and also as if he didn’t.
Am I the only one who assumed he was awake? It’s impossible that it’s too much on top of my femininity one of his legs. My two thighs are still open so his leg is right in the middle.
And then, he suddenly leaned over and hugged me! So suddenly my eyes widened. It’s a good thing and it’s not that bright inside the room because the light is off. What if the light is on?
And I was even more surprised when he suddenly put one of his hands inside my shorts. It was just steady and didn’t move as if he was sensing if I would object.
“Brent…” I moaned when he suddenly moved his hand and stroked the bulge of my womanhood.
He did not answer or speak. The man just continued with his caressing and rubbing. I thought maybe he was changing and didn’t know what to do so I just let.
And that was my biggest mistake – letting him go!
Because he didn’t stop and became even more daring. He slowly put his hand inside my panties.
I groaned. Because his hand is warm. It slid in and he felt my womanhood. It’s embarrassing, but I’m soaked. Meaning, I was affected by his actions.
I almost had something with Brent last night, but I managed to restrain myself. I’m not like before, overly vulnerable when it comes to him. It’s a good thing I resisted the temptation because I don’t want to betray Samer, even though he’s with Kate now.
Perhaps if I had learned to control my desires earlier, I wouldn’t have ended up with an untimely pregnancy. But I gave in to the surge of emotions, and that’s what happened. I fell for Brent’s advances, and I don’t want to repeat the past. But I can’t help but wonder where I went wrong back then. Why did I allow him to put me at risk?
I sighed as I remembered my foolishness in the past. Why? I was a smart kid, but why couldn’t I see my mistakes back then? I regret giving in to his sweet words. I was so innocent back then.
Because of what happened with Brent, neither of us could sleep well. I suggested that we should go back to his place because I needed to shower. Luckily, the fool agreed!
“I’m sorry about last night,” Brent apologized.
“It’s okay, but I hope you won’t do it again,” I warned him.
“I was tempted,” he said.
“I’m used to you getting tempted easily,” I replied. I wasn’t trying to hint at anything, but that was the truth.
“Don’t you want to shower early? Go ahead, I’ll prepare our breakfast,” Brent said before heading to the kitchen.
I entered the room and went straight to the bathroom to shower. In less than five minutes, I was done bathing. I wrapped myself in a towel before leaving the bathroom. As I walked towards the bed where my clothes were prepared, I suddenly slipped and fell underneath it.
Everything happened so fast that I thought I’d hit my head on the concrete floor. So, I quickly propped my elbow to lessen the impact on my head.
Due to the sudden turn of events, I couldn’t get up immediately. I just stared at the ceiling and revisited the incident. I heard Brent’s footsteps and voice getting closer to me.
“Jamie, what happened?” Brent’s voice trembled as he asked me.
“I slipped and fell on the floor,” I tried to stand up. “Ouch, my hip hurts. My elbow hurts too,” I complained.
“Oh no, I think you need a massage; maybe you accidentally hit a nerve, causing the pain.” Brent suggested.
“Now is not the right time since you still have work,” I told him, and when he nodded, I asked for his help to get up. I still needed to change my clothes.
“Do you want help dressing up?” Brent teased me while helping me adjust the towel that got dislodged from my body. I wasn’t shy anymore since he had already seen everything.
With my wallet in hand, I hitched a ride on Brent’s motorcycle. “Is it far from here, Brent?” I asked him.
“Not really,” he replied.
“I see. Hmm, is it okay if I rest my injured hand on your thigh? It’s been numb for a while,” I said to him.
“No problem,” he immediately agreed.
“Thank you, Brent,” I said while slowly resting my right hand on his thigh.
However, due to the rough road, I instinctively held on tightly to Brent. I wanted to avoid pressing my chest against his back, but I didn’t do it.
“Are we still far?” I asked Brent multiple times.
“We’re almost there,” he sarcastically replied, but I didn’t care.
“Good thing,” I said because I wanted to reach our destination quickly. Slowly, the desire for Brent came alive in my body, and I couldn’t let myself be fooled by him again.
While waiting for the elderly healer to come out of his room, I suddenly felt sad. It would have been so comforting to have Samer by my side, comforting me with my injury. Yes, I was with Brent, but it was Samer I wanted. However, he hasn’t been reaching out to me since our last conversation.
“You seem to be deep in thought,” Brent noticed my sighs.
“I was just thinking about him,” I said. “When you beat him up in the Khalifa lobby, I rushed to his side immediately, but now that I’m injured, he’s not here for me.” I really felt down about what happened between Samer and me. I heard Brent sigh next to me. Maybe he felt offended because I had another man on my mind.
“I should’ve have hurt him more back then,” Brent said, surprising me with his words.
“Do you want to hurt him? Are you really that angry?” I asked him, then I winced in pain.
“Jamie, why are you crying? Can’t you bear the pain anymore?” Brent got worried and called out the elderly man’s name loudly.
“I just remembered Groot,” I said, and Brent immediately cursed in frustration.
I felt slightly better after Lolo Nestor massaged me. When we arrived home, Brent kept sighing, and I didn’t know why.
“Is there something bothering you?” I asked him.
“Yes, it’s you,” he replied.
“And why is that?” I asked him again.
“Because you’re hurting my feelings, Jamie! I’m here with you, showing concern, but he’s still the one in your mind!” Brent raised his voice slightly.
“And what do you want to happen? Should I force myself to accept you back into my heart?” I asked him because I also wanted to hear his opinion.
“How much do you love him?” Brent asked.
I was taken aback by his last question. “Does love really have a measure?” I countered, as I didn’t know how to answer his question.
All I knew was that I missed Samer so much. It was just my pride that stopped me from going back to Khalifa and begging him to take me back.
“Since the beginning, you still chose Samer. When will you choose me, Jamie?” There was a hint of sadness in Brent’s voice as he asked me.
“Please don’t forget that you were my choice before. You just let me go. So, don’t blame me now for why my heart beats for someone else.” I reminded him.
“I’ll make you fall for me again,” he declared.
I just laughed at what he said because it’s not that easy to manipulate someone’s heart. “You are welcome to try,” I told him.