Oh man, can’t this day get any better!
“Oceana,’ she sang.
I knew Jessie was behind me the minute she covered my eyes with her hands. Her scent, most likely her perfume, soft hands and her voice gave her away.
“I know it is fucking you, Jessie.’ I laughed.
She immediately took her hands away from my face giggling.
‘What’s up, wanna go to prom?’ She asked excitedly.
I know what the prom is like.
And, I’m not ready to waste my time because I want to go for some prom, besides I don’t have anyone special to go with, except for Jessie, too bad she’s not a guy or else, I would have told her to accompany me.
“Nope!’ I shook my head. “I got some training to do and I would love to come with you but I can’t.”
“You are always training your ass off, don’t you ever take a break, come on, just go with me for once. You are an Alpha, strong and beautiful, what else do you need, no one will question you and besides, loads of guys are dying to be your boyfriend, you are not gonna lack.’ She explained.
“I want to be stronger.” I blurted out.
“What!” Jessie muttered.
I brushed it off. “No, it’s nothing.” I walked past her, I can’t slack off.
“Oceana, wait up.” She ran after me, blocking my way to my classroom.
“What’s wrong, Oceana?’ She gently held my shoulders, filled with concern, her soft eyes making me smile.
“It’s nothing.” I giggled.
“I know you.” She began with a sigh. “You are not useless. You are not a fool or anything, stop pushing yourself so hard, nobody hates you or dislikes you if that’s the right word but don’t take what your brother said to you years ago to heart, you are special in your way, believe it or not. You can shift, control your powers now, and give yourself a break, you are only eighteen, please Oceana.’
“What are you talking about? My brother?’ I sneered.
“Don’t act like I’m spilling shit, I know exactly what I’m saying.” She remarked.
“I’m training my way, it isn’t because of my brothers, I’m an Alpha girl. Why would I train myself because of them?”
“Because you want to be better, you wanna prove to them that you are not useless, till today you never told me what you saw on that day, that made your brother slam you like that.”
“I told you it was because I broke his expensive vase.”
“Which boy keeps a vase, isn’t that ridiculous?”
“Drop it, Jessie.’
“No, we are finishing this, I’m tired of keeping quiet.’
“I need some time alone, Jessie.” I hastily waddled past her and ran to my locker, buried my head and wept.
It was hard being an Alpha, acting all strong and mighty, everyone has high expectations of me, what do they think I am, a robot?
I am fed up with being who I’m not, expectations, being answered by the clan. It’s tiring, really tiring and hard, very frustrating.
I’m tired and why do I feel all alone in this world with no one to help me, why, just why do I feel alone?
And this sort of emptiness.
I took my face out of my locker, wiped off the tears, closed it and left for class, as usual, It was not like I couldn’t make friends but everyone just wanted to get close to me for one thing or another, no one is genuine and also has high expectations of me which I hate so much and Jessie is right, I have been pushing myself all these years just to be perfect and it’s not helping, I’m losing myself.
I’m not strong like my brothers, I’m not a hero like them, I just put up a front for them and they think I am so tough, no, I’m not dominant either, though I’m an Alpha.
I’m only an endless pit filled with weakness, I’m not strong, I’m not bold enough to become a leader, my brothers are much better than me anyway, much, much better.
I looked up and realized we were in for the next class. Everyone kept greeting me nonstop and even sending me gifts because I suddenly became the pack’s favorite and they all wanted favors from me.
Well, I am different from them, I can’t keep up with losers and fake people, yet I still pretend.
The school was soon over, I got up and proceeded to my car, the driver opened it for me as I got in and he shut the door.
I inhaled and exhaled, calming down my nerves. I hope this is going to be a good sign, no work or training at home, I’m exhausted and I wish I could just lay down on my bed and not wake up for a day with no disturbance whatsoever.
I thought.
The driver woke me up as soon as we got to the mansion, I stepped out of it and my brain was a bit in a daze. What I desired was to go to my bed and have the best sleep ever or so I thought.
While I was striding, drained out of my fucking self, I came across him, you should know who he is, the Almighty Alpha, who claims to be the fucking best, wanting me to be his wife, my father had accepted his proposal.
“How are you doing, Oceana, you look tired.” He came to me smiling and put his hand on my forehead, I knocked it off.
“Relax, I’m not some monster, coming out from a cave to attack you.” He chuckled.
‘I’m not some baby either,’ I replied with sarcasm, walking past him when he grabbed my arm. “We are not done talking Oceana.”
I forcefully pushed my arm from his. “Well, I am done talking and I have nothing to say to you, back off this instant and leave me alone.”
“You do know we are to get married soon, you don’t have to be all frosty, I am yours and any lady will die to keep me.” He grinned.
With a sarcastic tone. “Good for them, I am not any lady.” I walked out on him furiously.
I need to talk to my father and this will be the end of it.
I’m not getting married to that bastard.