He steps back from me, flinching like I’ve just stabbed him. “I handed you my fucking heart on a platter in Hawaii,” he whispers.
“Brock…”
“So” He frowns. “I was the pitstop all along. You were always going back to him?”
“Brock,” I whisper, and I try to grab his arm and he hits me away.
“Is this what you did to Simon? Promise him your undying love and then throw it in his face?”
“That is not fair!” I cry. “He is sick.”
“I know!” he yells. “But you need to work out what the fuck you’re doing and what your fucking role here is.”
I stare at him through my tears.
“Do you want to be his girlfriend… or mine?”
“I love you,” I whisper as the tears roll down my face.
“That’s not what I asked, Tully.”
I drop my head and stare at the carpet. I can’t leave Simon. I just can’t do this. “I need to do what’s right,” I murmur sadly.
“And staying with him is what’s right?”
“Yes.”
I look up, and his eyes search mine, the room falling deathly silent.
He screws up his face as he loses control, turns to the wall and punches it hard, making a hole in the plaster. I jump back in a complete fright.
“Brock!” I gasp.
He turns and storms out, not saying a word, just slamming the door behind him.
I stare at it, my vision blurred. The lump in my throat constricts and I sob loudly.
“Brock,” I whisper into the silence. “Don’t go.”
“So, the results are good?” Simon asks the doctor.
The doctor smiles with pride. “Yes, the results are great. The levels are on their way back up.”
I let out a sigh of relief and squeeze Simon’s hand in mine.
“You have a long fight ahead of you, young man. But I’m confident we can get you over this crisis,” the doctor tells him.
I smile and Simon’s parents hug each other in relief.
I look between the doctor and Simon. “When do you think he will be able to transfer back to Australia?” I ask. I’m so grateful for the medical treatment he’s had here in London, but Australia has cutting edge medical technology and we really want to get him home.
“I’d say he’ll be fit to travel in around three or four weeks.”
My heart drops. Four more weeks. That’s a long time. My mind instantly goes to Brock and the fight we had this morning. I exhale heavily. I want to be here with Simon. I couldn’t go home at this point.
God, this is a fucking mess.
The doctor fills out the charts and talks to the nurses. I hug Simon’s parents, and then him. “This is great news, Si,” I whisper as I hold his forehead to mine. “You’re going to be okay.”
He smiles and lies back, his eyes never leaving mine. My phone rings, and I scramble to pick it up. It might be Brock. I frown when I see the name Meredith lighting up the screen. I answer immediately.
“Meredith?”
“Oh, hi, Tull,” she says without a care in the world. “What’s up? Why did you call me so many times?”
I roll my eyes. Damn Meredith. I cover the phone with my hand. “I’ve just got to take this,” I whisper before I dart out into the hall. “What the hell, Meredith?” I whisper angrily. “Where the hell have you been?”
“My gran got sick, so we took a road trip to Queensland.”
“Oh.” My face falls. “Is she okay?”
“No, she’s not. She’s dead now. Buried in the ground,” she replies flatly. “Worms in her head. Wolf pack meeting tonight?” she asks, as if this is the only thing that matters.
I close my eyes as I try to get my head around the worms in the head comment. “I’m in London, Meredith.” I pause. “Simon is really sick, so I came to see him.”
“Oh, okay. Fly home now so we can have our meeting tonight.”
I sigh. “I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. Tell him you’re busy.”
I smile to myself. If only things were as black and white as Meredith sees them, life would be a lot easier.
“Meredith, Brock has been looking for you. He was worried that everything wasn’t okay.”
“No. I’m fine.”
I stay silent. I’m not sure if I should mention anything about Peachy Sue until the boys are physically with her. I bite my bottom lip as I listen. She’s seems fine. Maybe this is all a crazy mix up?
“So, when are you coming home?” she asks.
I glance up the hall towards the room. “I’m not sure,” I sigh sadly. “Simon needs me.”
“Oh.” She thinks for a moment. “I thought you broke up with him?”
“I did.” I pause. “It’s complicated.”
“Are you having a threesome with him and Brock now?”
“No, Meredith, for God’s sake, I’m not,” I snap angrily. For fuck’s sake, she’s annoying sometimes.
“Is Callie going out with Brock now?” she asks.
“No!” Damn it, I’m not in the mood for this crap today. “I’ll call you later.”
“Bye, Tully.” She hangs up, completely unaware that she’s just ruffled my feathers. I exhale heavily, knowing I need to call Brock.
I’ve felt sick since our fight this morning. Hopefully he isn’t already halfway back to Australia by now. I dial his number and he answers on the first ring.
“Hey, Pock,” he says sadly, and I instantly know he isn’t angry anymore.
“Brock, I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“Yeah. Me, too, hey?”
“Where are you?” I ask.
“I’m in the hotel room.”
I smile and stare at the wall in front of me, letting the silence hang between us. “I’ll come back there now, okay?”
“Yeah, okay.”
“Oh.” My eyes widen. “Meredith called me.”
“What?”
“She called me just now. She said her grandma died and she had to take a road trip with her mother.”
“Thank fuck.” He sighs. “Where is she now?”
“At her apartment.”
“I’ll get straight on it. See you soon.”
I hang up and walk back into the hospital room to Simon’s face light up when he sees me. My heart drops, and I fill with sadness.
He deserves better than this.
Brock deserves better than this.
The term torn between two lovers has never rung as true as it does right now.
I love both men; one for what we were, and one for what we are. A future with either of them seems impossible.
I need to decide.
Brock
I hang up and stare at the phone in my hand for a moment.
She called.
I’m glad I didn’t get on the first plane home like I wanted to. I even called the airline to try and change my flight, but I knew that if I got on that plane it would have been it for Tully and me. I get that she wants to be here. I get that she cares about Simon’s welfare, but when she said the words don’t make me choose, I lost my shit. It never occurred to me that choosing between us was even an option for her. Maybe I’m wrong.
Maybe I’m here in London making a fucking idiot of myself. Maybe I’ve given over a part of myself to her that was safer buried deep inside.
Stop it. She wouldn’t. I know she doesn’t love him, she loves me. I’m sure of it.
I call Ben’s number.
“Hey.”
“Hi. It’s me. Meredith is alive.”
“You’re kidding?”
“Nope, she just called Tully. Seems her grandma was sick, and she went on a road trip. Get a car around there and check on her, can you?”
“Okay, I’m on it.”
“Oh, and Ben…” I say.
“Yeah?” He listens.
“She’s got…” I pause as I try to articulate what I need to say. “She’s a bit out there. Not the norm kind of chick.”
“What do you mean?”
“She’s smart as a whip but is socially awkward. She says random things at random times. Tully says she’s somewhere on the spectrum.”