Isabella noticed the rage in Matteo’s face in response to her query. She believed she had unintentionally said something hurtful. “I’m sorry”, she began to explain, “I knew I shouldn’t have talked about the kiss,” but stopped when she realized she had done nothing wrong. She questioned, “I don’t understand; why are you sad all of a sudden?”
Matteo jerked his head upward to glance at the sky, then spun around and gripped his fist straight against the handrail. He clenched it so firmly into his fist that the contours of his veins became visible in his hand. Flashbacks of what happened in the past flowed through his memories. He could hear Lucia’s voice ring in his ear: ‘Matteo, please save me. Please don’t let them kill me. Leon, Leon, please give them what they want!” and then the sound of a gunshot jolted him out of his reverie with a shrug on his shoulder.
“Because Lucia is dead”, he yelled, forcing the words furiously out of his mouth. His eyes were bloodshot from his efforts to keep his emotions under control. He kept blaming himself for Lucia’s death, even when he knew it was Leonardo’s ego that killed her. He will never forget the day she passed away. She was the reason he changed because he needed time to heal from that traumatic event while Leonardo was still out and about, seeking to exact revenge on an unidentified individual who had mistreated Lucia.
Isabella was startled into stillness, and she didn’t dare to utter a word.
“Lucia is my ex-girlfriend. She was special to me,” he said coolly. “Until I lost her”, he mumbles, his face contorting in a grimace. “We didn’t break up,” he said, his heart full of pain as it brought back memories of her; Her moans and cries of agony when she was assaulted. He gritted his teeth, he couldn’t imagine the pains she must have felt that day. The humiliation she must have gone through and the sacrifices she had made because of Love. “Death took her away from me”, he added, clenching his fist tightly as he was letting out all of his anger on the handrail.
“How exactly did she died?” Isabella inquired in hushed tones, eager to get the complete tale.
Matteo sighed as he gradually released his grip on the handrail. “It’s quite a long story.”
“I love long stories,” Isabella says emphatically.
“She died. THAT’S IT,” Matteo growled, slamming his fist on the handrail to seal his words.
Isabella cringed back from his outburst, and realizing that he wasn’t interested in discussing it, she remained silent and didn’t bother to ask again.
Matteo wasn’t ready to talk about Lucia because he was still grieving her death. Lucia died one year ago, but it felt like yesterday when reminded about her. He let out a frustrated sigh and turned to face Isabella. “I’m sorry, but I can’t talk about her right now”, He apologized calmly, feeling he had been impolite to her.
“It’s fine; I understand. I know how it feels because I’ve lost someone very special to me, like you said”, she replied sadly, looking over the terrace. “I lost someone I couldn’t see when I was born.” Her tears were on the verge of spilling over as she talked, while Matteo listened intently as he could clearly connect to her anguish. He felt like they understood each other, and he was glad to have found someone who matched Lucia’s personality. “My dad,” Isabella blurted out, tears stinging her eyes. She was battling to keep her tears from falling, but they did.
“It’s okay. You can’t change the past; things happen for a reason”, Matteo said. He felt remorse for her. He reached to cup her face, then dashed away her tears with his thumb before he began to caress the side of her face.
Isabella felt his touch gentle, and it pleased her that she was able to regain some composure as he nuzzled her face into his hand. As Matteo released her face from his grasp, she let out a quivering sigh of relief.
“I’m deeply sorry for your loss… Growing up without a father figure is not easy. Shit happens, but we have to let it go,” Matteo suggested, and Isabella agreed with a nod.
There was a brief silence in the air as they both sought to get through their emotions.
“I couldn’t stop thinking about of you after the kiss last night,” Matteo said, breaking through the silence.
Isabella turned to face him. She was shocked. “But you said the kiss was a mistake.”
“Well, that’s a lie. And I want it to happen again.”
Isabella shrugged. “I don’t understand. I’m not your type. You are fit, and I’m just…”
“Fat?” Matteo snapped in a questioning tone, and Isabella felt her heart ached as she nodded.
“Yes”. She answered.
Matteo shook his head with a scoff. “Is funny how society has made you believe that the beauty standard is to be perfectly fit and beautiful,” he said. “But it isn’t, and if you don’t know, most girls wish to be like you just as much as you wish to be like other girls outside. The important thing is to love yourself the way you are and not change to meet people’s beauty standards. If you want to boost your self-confidence, then start by being you, rather than striving to be like other women or feeling down on yourself,” he stated, and Isabella shockingly listened intently. She never expected these words to come out from a man.
“Men tend to find women who are confident and proud of themselves to be attractive and sexy. They could even find you attractive, but you’ll never know unless you learn to embrace yourself. Make yourself the beauty standard because the society out there will only talk sh*t about you because they are pained and jealous of what you have. You should only worry about yourself, princess. It’s the only thing that matters.” When Matteo stated that, her demeanor shifted somewhat. He appears to have gone through a lot in life because his attitude seems mature and different.
Matteo gave her a short glance. “When I was with Lucia, she tried to gain weight because she thought she was too skinny and she felt insecure about her small boobs. Naturally, I prefer women with big boobs, but because I was attracted to Lucia and I was in love with her, I was able to look past those flaws and love her just the way she truly is, and now you’re thinking you’re not a perfect version of yourself or a match to me because you think you’re not fit,” he said, turning to face her.
Matteo continued. “There is nothing wrong with being overweight or underweight; as long as you’re healthy and comfortable under your own skin, then I’m okay with it. Just be free with me; I’m not like other men who are concerned with the appearance of your face or physique Isabella. You are unique and special. So don’t look down on yourself.”
Those words he uttered soothed her heart. Never in her wildest dreams did she envision meeting an attractive, mature man who didn’t mind what a woman’s body looked like.
“What’s your type of woman?” Isabella enquired.
“I don’t have a type. Size and appearance don’t matter to me. Once I feel attracted to any woman, I go for her. Fat, lean, slender, or chubby. They all deserved to be loved by the right man, I suppose”
His words sent shivers down her spine. She’d never felt this way before.
“And do you find yourself attracted to me?” Isabella inquired hopefully as Matteo’s gaze pierce deep into hers. Her heart skipped a beat as she returned her gaze to his green eyes. He gave her a long stare, and she felt a warmth flow through her body as a result of his intense gaze. The way he stared at her was unusual and distinct from the way any other man had looked at her. It was as though he regarded her as the only unique lady he had ever encountered.