Mario exhales heavily. “The Ferrara family has run Italy, the good and the bad, for many generations.”
Criminals.
The hairs on the back of my neck stand to attention.
“Not all Ferrara businesses are reputable. Stefano, your grandfather….”
Grandfather.
I had a grandfather? I was told he died before I was born.
Everything is a lie, my stomach rolls with nausea.
“Stefano built an empire, and because he died on the same day as your father, Enrico learned of the business this way too.”
“He didn’t know?” I gasp.
“No, he and his brothers, like you, were kept in the dark. Your father wanted you all to have a normal childhood, a privilege he wasn’t offered.”
“How the fuck could I have a normal childhood when he had another wife and family?” I spit. “I don’t want anything to do with this. You’re lying and none of this is true and if it is, I hate him.” I look around the room and stand abruptly. “And I hate all of you.” Adrenaline is pumping hard through my veins. “I’m going home. Stay the fuck away from me.”
Lorenzo stands and pushes me back into my chair, I fall hard back into my seat. “I know this is a lot to take in, Giuliano and with your personality it won’t be easy to conform with family tradition.”
“Because it isn’t my family,” I yell. “Stop fucking lying!”
“We are all here, at your service. You have your brothers’ full support and in time, you will learn to lead as your father wanted.”
I stand and march from the office, Alex and Valentino immediately stand. “We’re leaving,” I snap as I storm past them.
“Not without security,” Lorenzo calls from behind me.
I turn toward him, infuriated. “Fuck your security.”
“Who do you think murdered your brother, Giuliano?” Lorenzo bellows.
I struggle for air as adrenaline courses through my veins, I’ve never been so angry.
“You are now a marked man,” he cries. “You have two choices. Learn to lead us into the next generation. Or be the next murdered Ferrara, because trust me, they will come for you.”
Giuliano
Nightfall, the bringer of evil.
At the going down of the sun, dark thoughts have rolled in. And as the whole world peacefully sleeps, mine has come crashing to a devastating halt.
The lines have been blurred between a nightmare and reality.
I lie in the dark and stare up at the ceiling, my mind a clusterfuck of confusion.
Why is this happening?
I’m on the trundle bed in Alex’s bedroom, next to him. His regulated breathing calms me, a peaceful reminder that I can depend on someone.
My friends are all I have now.
I can’t go home, because then, I’ll have to see her.
I can’t bear it.
My mother’s words of wanting nothing to change between us are now crystal clear in meaning. She knew how I would feel.
My entire life has been a lie, her betrayal runs deep. I am the child of a mistress.
My heart broken beyond repair.
The only thing that I know for certain is that I didn’t know my father at all.
I’m not who I….
He was married to another woman.
My beloved father is nothing more than an adultering criminal. Head of the Mafia.
And I…I don’t even know who I fucking am anymore.
Unable to lie still for a moment more, I get up and go to the window and stare out through the darkness at the cars parked on the street.
The guards who now watch over me.
It all makes sense now; the reason Enrico treated me with such contempt. How must they have felt when they learned of me? His father’s mistress’s child.
The betrayal, to them too.
This is why I felt that he hated me before we even met. I didn’t imagine it.
She’s, my sister.
Francesca and I can never be together, no matter how much we care for each other.
There is no answer, this can’t be fixed.
I imagine us together, kissing in the darkness, the closeness we felt.
The love.
Oh….
My chest constricts with sadness and as I sit in the darkness, I feel so betrayed.
So alone.
The salty tears run down my face. I thought the day my father died was a bad day.
I was wrong, at least then I knew who I was.
This is the worst day of my life.
Incompetence, is there a worse feeling in the world?
I don’t think so.
I sit and stare at the computer screen, determined to try to understand the information before me. Books are strewn all over the desk in front of me. I’ve studied and studied this week, so much to learn.
It’s been seven days since I learned my fate.
Ten long days since I’ve spoken to her.
I exhale heavily and pick up my father’s handwritten letter. I skim through it. I must have read it over five hundred times.
Every time it hurts more than the last.
Knock, knock sounds on the door.
“Come in,” I call.
Lorenzo puts his head around the door. “The tailor is here with your suits, Giuliano.”
I nod once. “Thanks.”
I’ve had people fussing around me all week; apparently, I have to look the part now.
“Have you got a minute?” he asks.
I exhale and put my letter down. “Yes, come in.”
Lorenzo walks in and sits down at the desk. He stays silent and I know he has something on his mind.
“What is it?”
“I don’t….” He cuts himself off.
I raise my eyebrow impatiently. “What?”
“With all due respect, sir, I really don’t think it’s a good idea that you employ your two best friends.”
“Why not?”
“This is a family business.”
The audacity.
I smirk, annoyed. “I trust nobody here and my two right-hand men will be loyal to me and only me. They are my only family now.”
“You can trust me,” he whispers.
“I couldn’t even trust my own fucking parents, Lorenzo, what makes you think I would trust you?”
“How long are you going to hold such contempt for us all?”
I stare at him flatly. “Until you die.”
His brow furrows. “You say that like it’s a promise.”
“Maybe it is.”