“Pains?” Sia wondered and earned a nod from Michelle. They began strolling around again as Michelle cracked up her story.
“Can you call the word ‘love’ Mrs. Monson?” She asked, side-glancing at Sia.
“Love.” Sia drawled.
“How does it taste on your lips?” Michelle asked, looking straight ahead.
Sia shrugged. “Do words have a taste?” She asked, cackling.
“Yes.” Michelle nodded. “Love.” She called with utmost sincerity. “The word tastes delicious on the seam of my lips. But it comes with a host of other emotions as pains, hurt, happiness, sadness, depression.” Michelle drawled.
Sia felt her heart swell. She loves Michelle’s statement. When one isn’t in love you hardly feel either of these she mentioned.
“I loved once though I realized it late but that Love brought other streaks of emotions. The most dreadful ones are pains and depression.” She wagged her brows and sagged her jaw.
“When I was thirteen I fell in love. Although then I never knew what it entailed so I classified it as chemistry. Until the last minute, I found out it was love. Pure love.”
“My mother was a single mother who migrated from Indiana polis to Florida after my father’s death. She luckily met with another single mom who also migrated with her son who was a year older than me.”
“They met on public transportation. Chattered and finalized to move in together since they’re facing the same accommodation and money issues.” Michelle sighed and Sia listened raptly.
“We moved into one room apartment. Shared it for months and years. The boy never talked and his mother said he was suffering from Catatonia but never briefed the cause of it. He only stared at you when you’re saying something to him.”
“Really? That’s so sad.” Sia chimed in.
“One day we were alone in the house after returning from school. I went to shower and when I was done. I tried walking out of the bathroom but mistakenly slipped and fell flat on the ground. I wailed, blood puddled on the floor.”
“When he heard my shrieks of cries he dashed into the bathroom with shock gripped face. He fell to his knees, and for the first time called my name.”
Michelle smiled.
“When I heard the sound of his voice and the sweet undertone of it, I was beyond startled. I longed to hear it again and I forgot the pains my body felt. Thankfully, he talked again.
“Are you good, Michelle? Stay here let me go get first aid.” Was what he said and zoomed off. I found myself breathing heavily.
“I never knew the sound of someone’s voice would have so much effect on me. It was a spectacle. It was heavenly. When he returned with the kit and grazed his fingers on the skin of my forehead, dressing the wound, I loved the softness of his touch. I asked him.
Why aren’t you talking before?”
He looked at me with what I assume are wistful eyes.
“Its…a long story.” The words were hard for him to spill. I didn’t probe further rather I cradled in his arms as he dressed my wound.
“From that day, something ticked in him. He began caring so much about my well-being that even in school he’d check up on me. He talks to no one else except me.
However, his mother never knew he had begun talking neither did mine. It was just us. Whenever we were home, we did things together. Did our assignments together, ate together. And bathe together.
The first time we shared the shower, that chemistry as I assumed, was so intense that I wanted to feel how his lips tasted on mine. I wanted to feel his hand on my bare chest. I needed to know the extent of the softness of his palm.
I took a long sigh, I swear I didn’t wait for those thoughts to take root in my head well, so I found myself leaning into him. I found myself plastering my lips on his. I found myself clasping his hand on my chest.
It felt good. It felt so good I couldn’t pull away from him.
The chemistry was so intense. I knew he felt it too ’cause he didn’t pull away.
The kiss lingered long. The touch longer. It was bliss.
We dived into a secret high school relationship, unbeknownst to our mothers. We shared the same bed. Kissed, touched. Only but we didn’t have sex. I wanted to feel it too but he was scared to move further.
I was scared too but the chemistry was much stronger. Way too much, I couldn’t help it.
I told him to trail himself on my cunt. I told him it wouldn’t hurt if we tried. I persuaded him. And out of persuasion. He unzipped his pants as I lay on the couch with my legs spread apart.
My skirt hitched up. I saw him free his cock from its restraint. I saw him lean in on me. I felt him run his cock on my clit.
I swear, Mrs. Monson. It felt so good. He knew it too ’cause my name escaped from his lips. He ran his cock on my entrance, I groaned and writhe underneath him.
It was mouthwatering. It was good. I felt him inch himself deep into my entrance. I felt a confound of pain and sweetness.
Then I saw blood trickle down from my entrance and onto the couch.
We parted from each other. We panted. We gasped for air.
I feared we’d get caught. He feared too.
We didn’t know what we did. I didn’t know why I bled.
We panted.
We dreaded.
I dashed into the bathroom, got a washcloth, and brushed the blood off the couch.
Silence lingered in the air. We were lost in our thoughts. I blamed him for going deeper. It wasn’t part of the plan. I refrained from talking to him the entire day. The entire week.
The entire month.
I was worried. I wanted to know why I bled. He too wanted to know the reason I bled.
We didn’t talk to each again. ‘Cause we feared we’ll be caught in school or at home for what we did.
One day, while I was on my way home from school. He walked up to me on the road. Gripped my wrist and told me.
“Michelle, I’ve figured the reason you bled. Let me tell you.”
I seethed ’cause he was talking about our affair on the road. I seethed because he wasn’t cautious enough to seal his lips. I duck my hand from his.
I backed away from him. I dived into the road.
Only as he was blindly chasing me, a car ran into him.
I turned and saw him flat on the ground. I saw blood spilling from his head. I screamed. People screamed. They called the emergency services.
They took him to the hospital and I followed them. Crying. Weeping. Wailing. I held his hand.
I saw something strong in his eyes. He tried to budge his lips. He wanted to tell me something which I know has to do with the look in his eyes. He tried to gush words out but blood gushed out instead.
He held my wrist. I held his gaze. I cried. He smiled. He laced our hands together and cradled them to his heart. I felt his heartbeat. It thrummed against my fingers. I dreaded. “Don’t give up.” Was the only words spilling from my lips. I felt him in a way I never have.
I remember our first kiss. I remembered his touch. It’s something I wouldn’t want to forget.
He tried to utter something but only my name could make it out before he slammed his eyes shut.
His mother cried. I mourned. I slumped into depression. I felt pains.
I figured it too late that I loved him but we weren’t able to express our love because we didn’t know what it was then.”
Michelle paused. You could see tears at the corners of her eyes. Sia held her hand, assuredly. She already knows the bottom line of the story without being told.
“Months passed, I still mourned him. At night I felt lonely. Years passed I still grieved. During the day I wept.” Michelle wiped the tear that slipped from her eyes.
“Then I made a decision after I lost my mother. I decided never to marry or love someone else. I decided to dedicate my heart to him as a way to express our unexpressed love.” Michelle sighed.
Sia felt her heart faltering at Michelle’s words.
Truly, love comes with a host of other emotions. Love hurt her. Love stole her happiness. Love made her depressed. Sia held Michelle, gnashing her teeth.
“You see, Love is good when you know you feel it and you know your partner loves you,” Michelle uttered.
Pregnant silence took over. Sia knows the pains of digging up a memory you want to keep at bay. She knows what must be going through Michelle’s mind, her time with the boy she loved. The things they did together. It was bliss but it hurts.
“I’m so sorry, Michelle.” She uttered.
Michelle ditched her gaze, waving her off.
“It’s all a past tense. We are in the present, Sia.” She spewed. “Come on let’s keep strolling.” She urged and dragged Sia further away.
Sia agreed and they continued strolling around through the sidewalk. Sia allowed Michelle’s words to reel in her mind. She thought staying unmarried is the highest sacrifice she had ever seen but she didn’t say the words out to not dig up more memories Michelle tried to bury.
As they were working, Sia saw a white Pomeranian dog cradling into the owner’s soft touch and her heart stirred instantly.
Sia halted and inched closer to the dog, humming.
“It’s so beautiful.” She dropped to her haunches as the owner and patted the white dog at its back.
“You like it?” The woman asked and Sia shook her head like a toddler.
“I love it. It’s beautiful.” She hummed and carried the dog, touching its fur. She veered toward Michelle and asked.
“Isn’t beautiful Michelle?”
“Very beautiful.” She murmured and ran her hand on the dog’s back, feeling its soft fur. “I do not take you as someone that loves pets, Mrs. Monson.” She said, voice barely above a whisper.
Sia cackled lightly at Michelle’s comment. She loves pets but she never had the chance to get one for herself.
“I love pets. Especially puppies.” She hummed and whirled around to face the owner of the puppy.
“I love this a lot. Where can I get one?” She inquired, the dog shook its body slightly, basking in Sia’s touch.
“I sell puppies if you want one.” The owner spewed and Sia gaped.
“Is this for sale too? I’m buying it.” She didn’t wait to hear the owner’s response as she dug her hand into her pocket and wriggled out her purse.
“How much is it?” She probed.
“Three hundred dollars.” The owner spewed. Sia grabbed a handful of the dollar note in her purse and sank it into the woman’s hand.
“Thank you.” She mouthed and earned a head shake from the owner. Sia faced Michelle again and hurled. “Now I guess this will convince you more that I love puppies.”
Michelle’s lips twitch in a smile. Sia opted for them to return back to the villa ’cause the sun was getting unbearable.
“What would you name it?” Michelle inquired and Sia hurled.
“Fur. I think Fur will do.”
Michelle wanted to say something but Sia’s cell buzzed. When she glanced at the screen and read the message, Sia twitched her head and ordered.
“Let’s be faster. I’ve somewhere to go.”