Acceptance

CHAPTER 39- Acceptance
HUNTER’S P. O. V.
I hate seeing these tears in her eyes. I would do anything to make them stop. As I carry her up the stairs, I ponder what will happen next. Will she send me away as soon as she is in her room? Will she let me stay? Will she want me to stay?
I carry her to her room and place her on her bed. I stand there rubbing the back of my neck. I don’t know what to do. “Jasmine, do you want me to help you get more comfortable?” She looks up at me with those beautiful green eyes, they may be swollen and red from crying, but they are still beautiful.
“Can you help me get these things out of my hair? I am afraid they will screw into my head if I leave them in.” The tears are starting to dry up. I can still see that she is emotional. I don’t want to push her.
“Um, how do you want me? I could stand over you.” I have never felt so awkward in my life. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me. All the confidence that I usually have is gone in the presence of this woman.
She stands up next to me. “Sit on the bed.” It is a clear direction. I sit on the edge of the bed. She shakes her head. “Get on the bed all the way. Put your back up against the headboard.” I have to say it is a little bit of a turn on being told what to do by her. I would never let anyone else do this to me. For her I would be a submissive. I scoot along the bed and do as she says.
Jasmine slides her shoes off and just crawls up and curls into my lap. She feels so amazing. I almost forgot what I was supposed to be doing. Then I start working on her hair. These little things are really tangled in.
“I’m sorry for crying all over you.” She mumbles out. “I guess it all just caught up to me. I am losing so much. Friends, love, just so much. Everything is changing. I don’t even know how to grasp all that is changing.” I am not sure if she even realizes that she is talking to me or if she is just venting.
“Baby, I will always be here for you. I don’t know what all you are going through but I am here. Know that.” I am still untangling those damn things in her hair. I want to wrap her up in my arms and never let go.
“Hunter.” Her voice sounds tired and worn. Almost as if she is half asleep.
“Yeah, baby?”
Silence follows my question. I don’t know what she was going to say, all I hear from her is the steady breathing of a sleeping person. I can’t help the small smile that spreads on my face. She is asleep in my arms. I finished untangling those things in her hair, they really would have screwed themselves into her head if I didn’t take them out. The things girls do to look pretty, not that Jasmine needs any of it. She looks the most beautiful when she wakes up in the morning, before she even touches a brush.
I shift a little further down to get more comfortable. I think about leaving, maybe she doesn’t want me to stay. Then I remember the way she curled into my lap after telling me where to sit. She wants me here at least. I can hold that in my heart as I drift off to sleep.
JASMINE’S P. O. V.
I woke up in the dress that I wore last night. Curled up on Hunter’s lap. I feel so comfortable that I don’t want to move. However, I know that I can’t stay here forever.
I get up and try not to wake up Hunter. I am successful. He looks so cute, but so uncomfortable. He is still slightly sitting up and his head is cranked to the side. I want to fix him but I don’t want to wake him up. Eventually making him comfortable won out. I shifted him over to his side and now he is laying on top of the pillows. He doesn’t seem to mind, he has shifted so that he is snuggling my pillows.
I smile at his body sprawled on my bed. He needs to stay there.
I take a quick shower. After I am done, I link my dad. “Dad, Hunter is not going to be at training this morning. He was up all night.”
“I did not need to know that.”
“Not like that dad. Jeez. He was up with me crying all night. He was comforting me. I would never tell you something like that.”
“I know I was just trying to cheer you up.”
“I will be down shortly.”
“Actually, Alpha Christian is due to arrive in about ten minutes. I need you to greet him. I am not going to be able to.”
“I can do that. Then I have some paperwork to do. I will be in your office.”
“Alright, pumpkin, I will catch up with you later.”
I close down the link and look over at Hunter. I am still in a towel and am not quite ready for him to see me like this. I grab a pair of slacks and a blue blouse that I can wear loose. I want to clear the air with Hunter before I tell him about the baby. I leave my hair wet and down. I don’t have to impress Alpha Christian, after all I think I am about to crush his plans.
I leave Hunter in my bed and head down stairs to greet Christian. Jeez that sounds bad. I manage to make it to the door just as the cavalcade comes in. Christian hops out as soon as the SUV stops. He reaches in and unbuckles Eli who runs out of his dad’s arms and straight to me. He literally jumps into my arms at the top of the stairs.
“I swear when he found out that we were coming here, I had trouble keeping him in his seat.” Christian smiles as he climbs the stairs.
“You’re a week early.” I point out, hugging Eli.
“Yeah, couldn’t stay away.” I cringe at that. I guess now is the best time.
I turn to Eli. “Can you play with Selene for a little while? I need to talk to your daddy.” Eli nods to me but hugs me really tight for a second.
He hops down and runs to Selene. I smile at him as he runs off. I really like that little guy. With a sigh I turned to his dad. “I don’t like that look.” He is already sad and I haven’t even said anything.
“Can we go for a walk?” I try to use his tactic. Maybe that will make it a little better. He gives me a half smile and turns to offer me his arm. I take it as we walk off towards the woods. We have made a point to walk on the edge of the woods. I keep going until we are there. “Christian, I want to be honest with you. I have made a decision. I have picked Hunter. I want him to be my mate again. I know this hurts you. I really don’t want to do that. I care about you.”
Christian turns me so that I am facing him. “Beautiful, I am hurt but I understand. I will tell you, if he ever screws up or is out of the picture for any reason, then I will be here for you.”
“Christian, I want you to find someone to make you happy. Don’t you dare sit around waiting on me. I don’t want you to lose hope either. You have Eli to pull through for. You need to be his dad. Promise me you will do that for me.” I keep my voice straight. I need him to stay strong for Eli.
He takes a big sigh and smiles at me. “I will do my best. I have also made a decision that I wanted to talk to you about. If anything should happen to me for whatever reason. I want you to take care of Eli.”
“Of course, not that I think anything would happen to you.” I smile at him.
“I don’t either, but I want to be prepared.” His look changes a little. “Plus I need one more thing from you.” He pulls me to him and kisses me one last time. I can tell that it is a goodbye kiss. A goodbye to the relationship that we might have had. I let him have this. It will be the last time that we kiss.
HUNTER’S P. O. V.
I wake up alone in her bed. She had left a little while ago. I guess maybe I was right in thinking that I should have left last night. She didn’t want to see me this morning. Why else would she leave and not wake me like usual.
I get out of bed and head over to her window. I don’t know what possesses me to do this. I think I just want to see what I have missed. It looks like I have missed out on training. I am going to have to answer to Alpha for that later. Then I see a sight that brings me to my knees. That guy is kissing my mate. She isn’t pushing him off. That is why she left me, she went to him. It is so obvious now, she picked him.
I can’t be here for this. I can not be here to watch them be together and raise a family. I can not see her happy with him. I don’t even know how I made it to my room, but I did. I pull out a duffle and pack some clothes, I am not really sure what else I will need. I don’t really care. I leave the pack house in a blur. I have no intention of coming back. I can not live a life without her.
I head to the tree line to shift. I strip, putting my clothes in the duffle that I packed. I take one last look at the sky and see the clouds building. Good, it matches my mood. I shift and pick up my bag in my mouth. I trot to the creek that I have been at with Jasmine. I know she comes here sometimes. I am not sure if it is to think about us, or she just likes the spot. I lay by the bank and reflect on the decision that I have made. I don’t know how much time passes, but I know when I have made a final decision.
I link to her to let her know that she is free of me.
JASMINE’S P. O. V.
I am sitting in my dad’s office, I hate paperwork. After I had that little goodbye with Christian, I figured it would be best to give us both some space, let him come to terms with it. I am bent over the table analyzing the papers in front of me when a link comes through.
“I just wanted to let you know that you won’t have to worry about me anymore.” What the hell is Hunter talking about? Why does he sound so final?
“What are you talking about? Hunter, you’re scaring me.”
“I am not going to be here for you and your mate. I can’t watch that. I saw you with him, I know you picked him. I am just going to be gone.”
“Hunter, where the hell are you?” He really is scaring me, this almost sounds like he is going to end it. I don’t like the sound of it.
“Does it really matter?” I can hear the hurt and depression in his voice.
“I said, where are you?” I let my alpha command come through. I may not be in charge of the pack yet but I have enough power to assert control. Flashes of the creek come to mind. I know right where he is. I don’t even think. I shift and start running to the door. Someone sees and opens it for me. “You better not move.” I growl out.
“Jasmine, why prolong this. I know you don’t want me. Let’s just skip some awkward goodbye.”
I growl back at him. “I mean it, if you move I will kill you.” I have tunnel vision. I have to get to that creek, before he does something stupid. Trees pass by me in a blur. I don’t think I have ever run this fast in my life. I have to get to him.
Finally I see the clearing around the creek. Hunter is sitting there in his fur looking out at the water. I take my head and ram it straight into his side. He falls over and looks at me in shock. “What the hell was that for?”
“What the hell was wrong with you?”
“Look, I know you didn’t pick me.” He picks himself up and stands in front of me. “I decided to leave before I had to watch you be with him.”
I am so pissed. This presumptive ass. I will show him. I lunged at him and bit his shoulder right where I needed to put the mark. I pull back and shift back to my skin. Not even caring at this point that I will be completely naked. I am panting from the run, but my skin gets cooled down as the first drops of rain hit me. He stares at me for a second. Then shifts back to his skin. “Did you mean to do that?” The look in his eyes is enough to make me want to cry, they hold desperation.
“Yes, you dumbass…” He cuts me off when he lunges at me and kisses me. It’s like we hadn’t touched each other in days. The desperation in both of us was enough to drive me mad. Finally I feel at one with him again, right there in the pouring rain. Not a care in the world. Definitely not the care of the mud and rain that we are enduring on our skin, it’s like it doesn’t exist and it is just us in a void of nothing.
HUNTER’S P. O. V.
When the initial bliss wears off and I am laying next to her in the rain and mud. I suddenly realize that we are in the open and anyone could come by and see what is mine. I jump up and dig in my duffle. Of course everything is wet, but I don’t really care at this point. I pulled out some shorts for me and shorts and a t-shirt for Jasmine. She smiles at me as she takes the clothes from me. “I could just shift and walk back to the pack house.”
“I don’t want to take my hands off you. If we shift I will have to take my hands off you. Right now, I am going to pull you close to me and take you back to that room for the rest of the day. I have a lot of time to make up for.” I give her a confident smirk. “I am also moving into your room. I don’t want to be away from you for even a second if I can help it.” Now that she is dressed I pull her into my arms. “Mine.” I growl at her.
She squeezes me back. “Mine, you better keep it that way.” There is a definite malice behind that growl.
“I would never dream of losing you again. You are my life and I can’t live without you. I have been going through hell without you.” I bend down and pick up my bag. Still not letting my arms leave her. I really do need this woman. I pull her close as we walk. I am still a little bit scared I am dreaming all of this. Her being here is really like heaven for me.
“Hunter, I have something else I need to tell you. I was going to tell you earlier, but things were, well, intense.” She sounds nervous as hell.
“You are scaring me again.” She really is. I just need to have her back, as long as she is mine.
“It’s nothing bad. At least I hope you don’t think so. I guess you could think so. I am going a little crazy right now. I haven’t told you because I don’t know how you will take it. I want you to be happy about it.” She is so cute right now.
I stop and pull her around so that she is looking at me. So that I can look her in the eyes. I lean in and take a big sniff, enough to calm my nerves. That is when I notice it. Something is off. Her scent is different. “Baby, why do you smell different?”
Tears start to brim in her eyes. “That is what I am trying to tell you. I am pregnant.”
I think my mind froze. Like literally I had no idea what I was thinking. It was just blank. I tried for this. I want this. My mate is having my pup. Wait… “It is mine right?”
“Hunter, I haven’t been with anyone else. Only you. The doctor said it was that first time.”
Now, I am even more stunned. I thought we didn’t make it happen. We managed on the first try. I lean in and kiss her. I want her to know I want this. She has no reason to fear. “I tried every time I was with you. I want our family. Jasmine, I want you, all of you. I will be the best dad that there is.”
“I think you might need to compete with my dad on that. Because to be honest when he found out about this I thought he was going to lose it. But he was just there for me.”
“When did your dad find out?” I am surprised that he didn’t kill me.
“That day you saw him running to the clinic.” She gives me a half smile.
“Great, now I will need to face your dad. That will be fun. Who else knows?” I hold her tighter.
“Selene, Jay, and you aren’t going to like this next part.” She winces at the words.
“What am I not going to like? Jasmine, just tell me.”
“Christian.”
She’s right I did not like that part. “How the hell does he get to know before me?” I growl out.
“He smelled it on me. He saw me with Selene and figured it out. I wasn’t going to lie to him. I didn’t intentionally tell him first. Don’t get angry with me.” She doesn’t sound defensive, she sounds sad.
“Hey, baby, I’m sorry. I’m not angry. I just want you to be with me. I am jealous of Christian. He almost had you. He was kissing you. I saw him a few times. I will always have a bit of resentment towards him. I can’t help that. Just be mine.”
“Hunter I have always been yours. I will always be yours.”
I can’t help it, I claim her mouth again. The urge comes again. I pull back. “I am going to take you again right here if we don’t get back to that room.” I give her a low growl as I pull her closer.
“Race you back.” She grins, pulling away from me and running towards the pack house.
“I love this woman.” I ran after her. I caught her on the porch. I was going to sling her over my shoulder caveman style, but then I remembered her belly and decided that wouldn’t be a good idea. So I go with the bridal style. I carry her up the stairs, laughing and giggling all the way up the stairs.
I ignored the looks that we got. I am sure we are a sight, we might look deranged at this point. We are both soaked, covered in mud and laughing up a storm. I don’t doubt that people think we have lost our minds. I don’t care, let them think that. I have the woman of my dreams in my arms.
When we make it up to the room, I push her into the bathroom. “You get cleaned up. I know you won’t be comfortable until you do.”
She looks back at me. “Dear, you don’t look any better.”
I look down at myself. She is right. I am covered in more mud than her. “I will go to my old room and get cleaned up. I have to get some clothes too. It would make sense right now.”
She winks at me. “I’ll see you when you get back.” I watched as she disappeared behind the bathroom door. I hurry to the door to go get clean. I do not want to be away from this woman anymore than I have to be. The mother of my child, that is a warming feeling.
As soon as I hit the landing I see Christian. I want to gloat, I really do, but then I remember that kiss and it takes everything I have not to kill this man. He puts up his hand to stop me. “I was coming to talk to you.”
This is new. Usually he avoids me. “Ok.”
He puts out a hand to shake. “The best man won.” I shake his hand although a little reluctantly.
“I guess I did.” Did that sound gloaty?
“I want to talk to you about the future. I don’t want any hard feelings between us. Jasmine will still be my friend. I have named her guardian of Eli if anything should happen to me. The bond she has with my son will not be severed easily. I think it would be best if we come to a truce. I will not lay another hand on Jasmine, unless of course you hurt her, then all bets are off.” He makes sure I understand that last part.
“I appreciate that. I would never make Jasmine cut off her friends. You keep your hands off my mate and we have a truce. I will be civil with you. Hell, maybe in the future we can learn to be friends.” I smile at him. I am sure that it will be a cold day in hell, but I can put it out there.
“It is always a possibility.” He smirked. I am sure he has the same thought. “Well, I will let you get cleaned up. I will be seeing you at dinner. Also after dinner. My son sleeps with Jasmine when we are here. It is a standing arrangement.”
I smirk at him. “Your son is always welcome.” Hell, I don’t mind the kid.
“Indeed.” He smiled back and left the stairway.