“Can I ask you something?” Khizer, who was leaving the room after giving me my phone, stops in his tracks and looks at me questioningly. “I can’t go home tonight, and I need to make up a reason for that.”
I don’t know what explanation to give my parents for not coming home tonight, so I turn to Khizer for answers when he comes back in to give me my phone.
“A reason for not going home tonight?”
“Yes. Don’t have the male privilege, you see, and will probably be wiped off of the face of the earth for spending the night away from home.” I say bitterly.
In this Godforsaken society, a girl not coming home at night is a crime greater then murder. Girls get abandoned, forcefully married and even beaten to death if they spend a night out. No matter the amount of explainations you give, nothing can justify a girl not returning home for the night. Because for them, if a girl doesn’t come home by midnight, it means she is having a sexual affair.
If I don’t go home tonight, more then one of my family members will believe that I am no longer a virgin.
I can’t think of something logical at all right now, so might as well ask him and get it over with. It’s already almost midnight.
Khizer raises an eyebrow. “I thought a lawyer like you would be good at lying.”
I frown. “I don’t lie.”
He grunts. “All lawyers lie.”
“Just like all woman are gold diggers?”
“Yes, and all man are womanizers.” He counters.
“You have extreme trust issues did you know that?”
“If I have trust issues then you do too.”
“No. I speak based on facts. All man are assholes. That’s a fact. But you? Yours is an opinion derived from an unfortunate experience. You got exploited by one woman and obviously didn’t want to blame yourself for poor judgement, so you validated your experience by saying that it wasn’t you who chose the wrong person. The woman species over all are just greedy and materialistic. That, right there, are trust issues Mr. Malik.”
He nods. “Had fun dissecting my brain based solely on prejudices?”
“I can bet my eye balls that an ex-girlfriend betrayed you.”
“I don’t want your eye balls.”
I frown. “Did you or did you not get betrayed?”
“I don’t see how me not trusting woman must be connected to a past betrayal but you not trusting man is not? You’re cheating Ms. Haseeb.” He smirks. “And cheating always involves lying. Hence proving that you lie.”
My frown deepens. “You’re putting words in my mouth.”
He ignores me. “I wonder what happened to you for you to start hating man.”
I roll my eyes. “They existed is what happened. And don’t change the subject. We were talking about you. I know nothing about you.”
“Your lack of information is not my fault Ms. Haseeb. It’s not my problem that you’re an open book and I’m not.” He says it patiently, as if talking to a stubborn child.
“I am not an open book.”
“You have an opinion ready for everything, and you make sure everyone hears it. When you believe in something, you want others to believe in it too, so you tell them about your own experiences to make them trust you, which means they find out way more about you then you think they do.” He grins. “Accurate enough?”
I glare at him. “You couldn’t be more wrong Mr. Malik.”
I fume at the thought of him knowing me well enough to hit exactly where it hurts, but I’m not even sure who broke his goddamn heart.
“Are we still not on first names?” Khizer asks.
“Lets keep it that way.” I move to grab my phone from the side table with my left hand, since my right ones broken, and daggers pierce up my back.
“You’re not supposed to be moving.” Khizer comments, eyeing me.
Noticing a change in his tone, I look at him, if only to distract myself from the pain.
He’s looking back at me, but there isn’t the usual friendliness in his gaze. Instead, he looks disappointed.
“Why are you staring at me?” He says when I don’t look away.
“Because you’re staring at me.”
“I’m not staring at you.”
“Then what are you doing?”
“Waiting for you to get it into your head that you’re injured and shouldn’t be moving.” He crosses his arms. “At this rate you’ll open up your wound again.”
“You’re glaring at me because you want me to stop moving?”
“Yes.”
“How am I supposed to get work done if I don’t move?”
“Ask for help.” I blink.
“Sorry?”
“Ask for help.” He repeats. “It won’t make you any less of a feminist.”
I scoff. “I don’t see how that’s related to this.”
He nods understandingly. “Yes, you’re right, let me correct myself. Not accepting help will not make you a better feminist. It’ll just make you an ungrateful bitch.”
Ouch.
“Mr. Malik I-”
The room suddenly falls into darkness.
“The electricity went out.” Khizer says, irritated. “Wait a moment, I’ll go out to check.” He walks out the room, and soon, the sound of his footsteps disappear.
I turn back to look at the ceiling, a small part of it illuminated by the light of the moon coming from the window. Voices come from outside the room, then disappear.
Dead silence falls on my ears and I shiver. Intrusive thoughts begin to cloud my mind, and images of what happened today morning flash through my eyes, making chills run up my body and my eyes sting.
Something wraps on the small window, making me jump, and I stare at the window, waiting for the glass to break and a bullet to come through. Nothing happens. I hear someone walk in the door, and my head snaps in that direction, making me flinch with pain. But no one is there, and the doorway is empty.
The air gets stuck in my throat. I can’t see. A whimper escapes me. I can ???? someone here. Someone is here.
What do I do? I can’t fucking run. Hell I can’t even move, ???? ?? ? ??? Tears start falling down my cheeks, and this time, they’re of fear. The fear of dying. Of getting hurt.
Khizer’s voice rings in my ear. “??? ??? ????.”
“??????!” I scream at the top of my voice. My back screams with pain at the pressure, and my lungs refuse to support me.
“??????!” I think its even louder this time, but I can’t hear it over the sound of my heartbeat. A shadow flits through my door, and I scream.
Something warm oozes down my back, and I’m pretty sure it’s my wound opening up.
I see a light shine outside the room, but it’s blurry. Maybe it’s my tears. I hear running footsteps and then his familiar voice.
“Mansha! What happened?” And it feels like a pound of air sinks into me, and my lungs open up to greet it.
Khizer is there besides me, shining a torch in my face. My tears don’t stop.
For a while, I just lay there, crying wordlessly, my mind going fucking insane and my heart beating rapidly.
I hear whispers near me, and I just know all the man in this house are in this room right now. But I can’t do anything about it. I don’t have the energy to ask them to leave, nor the power. I am incapable of leaving the room myself as well.
As if reading my thoughts, I hear Khizer shout at all of them to leave, and a moment later, it’s just me and him and the ray of light. I feel his fingers wrap around mine, his grip soft enough to not hurt my wrist, but strong enough to let me know he’s there.
My entire body buzzes with pain. I don’t know where it starts or ends. It’s just there. But so is the light shining in my eyes. So is the hand soothing my palm. And that means Khizer is here. A familiar face. Someone who offered to help. Someone who ??????.
“It’s ok. No one’s here.” His whisper is the only thing I can hear. It makes my tears fall harder.
But this time, they’re tears of relief. Of the joy of still being alive.
And so, for the second time since I met Khizer, I do something I thought I’d never do. I accept his help.
But this time, I know I’m making the right decision.
The tears slowly stop, my whimpers fading away, and I let myself succumb to the exhaustion, his fingers around mine reassuring me that he will help.