Ava.
“Try me.”
A second passes, and a shaky breath escapes my lips. Nikolai’s breathing comes out in steady pants above me as my body hums with the aftershock of what could have been my orgasm.
When he doesn’t move, I roll my hips once more against his erection, and his gaze grows wild with need.
And then he snaps.
He cursed in Russian, his grip tightening in my hair before he was on top of me. Kissing me. Devouring me.
I gasp when he rips his mouth away, but it soon turns into a moan when he starts to suck and nibble on my neck. My hips roll, and hot pressure starts to build inside me when I feel his erection.
My body goes still, and He lets out an amused sound when I feel the head of his erection nudge against my entrance.
“Not so mouthy now, huh?”
I want to hit him for teasing me, but I can’t move. He’s big. Really big and a part of me, no, scratch that; all of me is pretty sure he’s not going to fit.
Nikolai must sense my hesitation because his teasing expression softens, and his fingers trail up my sides, slow and soothing, like he’s trying to reassure me with his touch. “Look at me,” he breathes, and when I do, all the breath I was holding stutters out.
His eyes, those beautiful, gorgeous emerald eyes, are watching me with an intensity that has nothing to do with l, ust and everything to do with patience. Russian.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” he murmurs, brushing his thumb across my cheek. “And I’m not going to take anything I know you’re not ready to give, solnyshko. We can stop now if that’s what you want. I’m not going to force you into anything.”
The endearment makes my throat tighten, and I squeeze his forearm.
“No. I don’t want you to stop.?
I was ready to lose my virginity, and no matter how stiff my body might be, I knew that losing it to Nikolai was something I could never regret.
He was my husband. My captor and my saviour, but more importantly, my heart was no longer mine.
“I’ll be gentle,” He murmurs, kissing my cheek. “I’ll be so fucking gentle, Solnyshko. I promise.”
He straightens off me and my fingers fly to the button of his pants to help him undo them. Once he’s out of them, my gaze drops to his length and… my goodness.
I knew he was big. I expected it. But what I didn’t expect was the way my body would react to seeing him, every bit of him, for the first time.
My husband’s cock was beautiful, and that was a sentence I never thought that I would never say out loud or in my head.
Long and thick, with prominent veins running along the shaft, it curved slightly upward and looked, there was no other word for it, perfect. My mouth goes dry. My lips part. And I run my tongue over my bottom lip in appreciation. Nikolai catches the action and matches it with a hungry look of his own.
“Don’t look at me like that unless you want me to lose every ounce of self control, I have left,” he warns, voice hoarse with restraint.
I swallow hard, torn between my want for him and the nerves twisting my gut. “Too late.”
With a groan, he falls back on top of me. I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer as he settles between my thighs, using his hands beside my head to brace himself.
Heat radiates from his body, making my nerves spike, yet there’s something in the way he looks at me, so tender, so reassuring that gently eases the knot in my chest.
“Relax, Malyshka,” He orders, kissing me softly and my eyes nearly roll to the back of my head at the roughness of his accent grating against my ear. “I’ve got you.”
That he did.
But so did I.
I grab hold of his shoulders from underneath his arms and wrap my other hand around his neck, clinging to him as I brace myself.
“Tell me if it’s too much,” He says and I nod.
My legs are wide enough for him to fit and my knees are bent to the point that the top of my knee caps graze the underside of my breasts.
The head of his cock touches my entrance and my eyes widen when I feel what we’re about to do.
“Condom.” I pant, halting his actions. He pulls away from me slightly, a strangled curse escaping his lips in Russian as he reaches for the nightstand. He finds a condom, and there’s a certain relief that washes over me for only a second before being replaced by crippling doubt.
“How long have you had that?” I can’t help the hurt the makes it’s way into my question. He once told me that he hadn’t been with a woman since we got married, but what if he had lied? What if he’d been seeing someone else and was just good at hiding it?
Suddenly, I didn’t feel so sure of myself.
“I know what you’re thinking.” He murmurs, his forehead pressing against mine as he exhales deeply. “But trust me, you’re the only woman I want.”
“Then why do you have a condom?”
“I’ve had it since the day you moved in.”
Oh.
Warmth floods my skin, replacing the knot of doubt that had taken hold with something tighter. The tension in my chest eases, but there’s a lingering vulnerability that I can’t quite shake.
“You’ve had it… since I moved in?” My voice is soft, almost disbelieving, and I pull back slightly to meet his gaze. His eyes, full of sincerity, search mine, as though waiting for me to see the truth in them.
“Yes,” he says, his tone firm but gentle.
“That was pretty presumptuous of you, don’t you think?” He shrugs and a wolfish grin overtakes his lips.
“What can I say?” He leans down, smiling, and takes a nipple in his mouth. “I’m a hopeful man.”
My back arches off the bed and I instinctively roll my hips once against his bare cock and God, that sensation. I’ve never felt anything like it in my life.
He laps at my nipple for a full minute before releasing it and doing the same with the other one. He licks and sucks before letting it go with a loud pop.
I dig my nails into his shoulders as he scatters kisses along my jaw, my neck until my body is completely and utterly related underneath him.
He pulls back a bit to roll on the condom and when the tip of his cock touches my entrance again, I open for him.
He pushes the head of his cock inside me in one deep thrust and I see stars. I felt full. So fucking full and stretched to the point that it hurt.
“Nikolai,” I sob, clutching at his arms desperately.
My entrance burned at the intrusion and yet, despite the discomfort, I didn’t want him to stop.
He stills and we’re both shaking as he eases out of me and then back inside. I moan and dig my fingers into his shoulders. His muscles flex under my palm and it feels euphoric the way he moves inside me. Slow and tempered, like he’s memorising everything. From the way I feel to the little sounds that crawl past my lips.
“You’re so fucking tight,” he whispers, brushing a damp curl from my forehead as he leans down to kiss me again. The kiss is enough to knock my world off its axis as well as distract me momentarily from the pain.
I swirl my hips, hoping to take in more of him, but his hands come down around my waist, stilling me.
My nails dig into his shoulders and he lets out a harsh sound, pushing in. A wave of satisfaction and pain coils at the pit of my stomach and eyes flutter shut as I try to keep what sliver of composure I have left.
“Ideal’no podkhodit,” he murmurs against the top of my breast, peering up at me with a grin.
(Perfect fit)
“I knew we’d fit so well together Solnyshko,” He whispers, lips only an inch away from my nipple. His gaze drops lower, locking at where we’re connected and I can feel a shudder rock his body. “Look how well you take me. You’re taking me so good, Malysh.”
“Nikolai…” My gasp turns into a moan when he twists my nipple between his rough fingers.
“Your body was fucking made to take my cock.”
He slides his hand down my body, over the dip of my waist and the curve of my hip, before settling harshly on my thigh and squeezing. He pushes in deeper and this time my body welcomes him properly without the initial resistance.
“Fuck,” He hisses, his eyes lifting to meet mine. “You shouldn’t have let me take you. You really shouldn’t have. Because now, I don’t think I’ll ever have the power to let you go.”
I pulse around his length and wrap my arms tighter around him. “Don’t.” I say, my words breathless, “Don’t let me go.”
Never let me go.
Circling my waist, he lifts my hip off the bed and places a pillow underneath me to angle his thrusts better. I’m confused at first but the second he sinks back inside, I understand why. He hits something deep inside me. Something devastating. My back arches and my fingers claw at his shoulders as I cry out, utterly undone, by the way he fills me.
“That’s it,” he growls, his voice a breathless rasp. “Take all of me. You look so pretty wrapped around my cock.”
The air in my lungs pack up and leave and I’m left gasping and panting as I try to keep up with his thrust.
So this was what sex was.
This was what made people run mad with desire.
I finally understand it now. It was freaking glorious.
“Niko… More… please” My moans had morphed into something else and more sounds I can hardly recognize as mine escape me.
The sound of our moans and groans mingle with the wet sound of him moving in and out of me. I moan into his mouth as every inch of me ignites with my pleasure.
The pain dulls with every movement until only a numb ache remains.
His kisses are everywhere: my jaw, my throat, my shoulder, grounding me, reminding me to breathe.
I gasp when he hits a spot so deep my toes curl and a strangled moan slips from my throat. He groans in response, his control unraveling thread by thread.
He tenses against my fingertips as he withdraws and I dig my nails into his biceps, clenching around him.
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fucking hell sweetheart, don’t do that.”
My lips part at the sight of his muscles flexing in his shoulders as he moves. He feels much larger.
“You’re so wet for me, Ava. It’s making it extremely difficult for me to be gentle with you.”
The way he says my name, all throaty and desperate. I almost come there and then.
“Then don’t be.”
A pained groan. My legs tightened around him, my heels digging into his ass as I pushed my breast towards him. “Harder…”
He squeezes his eyes shut and then reopens them. Darkness fills his once light gaze and excitement bubbles inside me.
His thrusts turn frantic as he buries himself to the hilt inside me over and over again, the noises from his lungs animalistic and unrecognisable.
Nikolai’s lips crash against mine with a velocity so strong I lose it and eyes flutter closed as I feel the warm coiling sensation start to build again in my lower abdomen. But he’s not having it.
His hand comes up to grasp my chin, eyes boring into mine. “Eyes on me when I fuck you, Solnyshko”
A hand comes between us when my thighs start to tremble and he strokes my clit until all I see are stars.
“Come for me,” He pants, still stroking me. “Now.”
My body obeys and I explode around him, waves of pleasure crashing through me so powerfully I forget everything else. Everything but him. His name spills from my lips like a prayer as I shatter in his arms, held together only by the strength of his embrace and the way his eyes never leave mine.
He follows soon after, roaring his release into my neck.
We lay there for what feels like forever. Him on top of me, my mind spinning as I try to process what the hell just happened.
Our chests rise and fall, a gentle rhythm mirroring the soft sighs of satisfied individuals.
Sweat gums our skins and if this were anywhere else I probably would’ve pushed him away, instead I pull him closer.
He’s still inside me when my fingers find his neck, treading softly in his hair until he pulls away and out of me.
I watch him disappear into the bathroom, letting my eyes drift close for only a second before I hear him return.
He climbs onto the bed and I jump when I feel something warm press against my opening.
“It’s okay,” He tells me when I pull away, parting my legs wider. Too exhausted to feel embarrassed, I let him clean me and when he’s finished, he returns the washcloth back into the bathroom and slips in beside me under the covers.
“How are you feeling?” He asks, pulling me against him with his arm around my waist.
I sigh, my body still humming from the aftershock of my orgasm. “I don’t know,” I whisper honestly. It felt like I was floating. Like I’ve been struck by lightning and now my skin’s too small for everything I feel
Nikolai chuckles softly against my neck, his breath brushing over my sensitive skin. “I fucked you that good, huh?”
I snort, turning in the bed so that I can face him.
“You wish.” I tell him, cuddling close.
He smiles softly, brushing my hair from my skin and pecking my lips.
“Get some sleep, Solnyshko,” He murmurs, pressing a kiss against my forehead.
“Nikolai,” I call his name right before sleep takes over.
“Da?”
“Do you think I’ll regret what happened in the morning?”
“I hope not,” A beat passes. “Do you think that you’ll regret it?”
I snuggle into him, pressing my lips right on his beating heart. “I don’t think I can ever regret you.”