Stella’s P. O. V.
“Please don’t regret for a second for killing that monster, Stella. You’ve freed your mother from the unbearable pain. You have no clue how relieved I am. Thank you.” My mom expresses her gratitude when I lie her down on the bed at night in one room of Alex’s beach house.
After my mother was discharged, nobody wanted to return to the place where we used to live with that monster. My mom has so many painful memories tied to that house, and I killed the monster there. Alex didn’t want any of us to be anywhere near a place haunted by his memories. So he made the decision to bring us here instead.
I tuck the blanket around Mom. I’m glad I gave her peace, but what about the weight I carry now? The monster is gone, but the trauma of killing someone is unbearable. And I can’t share it with anybody. Alex and Mom, both are dealing with their pain. How can I burden them with mine when they’re already struggling to heal?
“Mom, you don’t need to thank me,” I respond, sitting on the edge of the bed. “I just… I did what I had to do and what any daughter would’ve done.”
She takes my hand in hers. “You did more than that, Stella. You gave me my life back. I don’t want you to feel guilty about what happened. That man… he was evil. There’s no justification for the things he did.”
Although I’m not sharing with her what I’m going through, she still understands me and her words are a slight comfort. I really don’t understand how she always gets to know what’s bothering me.
I squeeze her hand gently, forcing a smile that feels too tight. “I’m just glad you’re safe, Mom. That’s all that matters now.”
“Now you go to Alex. He must need you.”
As she mentions Alex, my heart clenches with pain. “Mom, he’s so broken. I’ve never seen him like this. It’s hard to face him when he’s like that. He’s always been so strong, and always the one holding everything together. And now…” I pause, swallowing hard. “Now, he’s falling apart, and I don’t know how to help him.”
Now she squeezes my hand, explaining to me, “These are just bad days, my love. Pain like his doesn’t heal overnight, but it will. Just being there for him, Stella, is enough. Be his strength. Time will do the rest.”
“Of course.” I nod, staring at her with determination. “Mom, I’m going to be there for him. I’ll become his strength, just like he was mine when I was lost. I’ll help him find his way back.”
Mom smiles, her eyes heavy with both exhaustion and pride. “That’s my girl. You’ve always been strong, Stella, even when you didn’t realise it.”
I lean down and press a kiss on her forehead. “Goodnight, Mom. I love you.”
“Goodnight, sweetheart. And I love you too.”
As I leave her room, I take a deep breath. My chest still feels heavy with the weight of everything-of what I’ve done, of what Alex is going through-but Mom’s words give me the resolve I need. I’ll fight through this darkness with him, for him, just like he’s done for me.
I enter our room and find Alex sitting by the window, his shoulders slumped and his head resting in his hands. He doesn’t look up as I come inside because he is so lost in his thoughts.
“Alex…” I call his name, walking over to him. When I place my hand on his shoulder, he flinches slightly but doesn’t pull away. My heart aches to see him this broken, but control myself from crying. I need to be strong for him.
Slowly, I climb onto his lap before slipping my arms around his neck and resting my forehead against his.
“Let me heal you, Alex,” I whisper in his ear, my voice slightly trembling with pain and love.
I truly want to heal Alex like he healed me. I want to take away his pain and make him whole again. But I know healing doesn’t work that way. It’s slow, messy, and filled with moments like this-where silence speaks louder than words and touch carries more meaning than any promise I could make.
He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and wraps his arms around me, pulling me close as though I’m the only thing holding him together. “You’re already doing it, Stella.” He buries his face against my chest. “Your presence… it’s enough. Just stay like this.”
We stay locked in each other’s embrace for a long, quiet moment, his arms wrapped around me tightly as if he’s afraid to let go. I run my fingers soothingly through his hair, feeling his breathing slowly steady against me. For a while, there’s only the sound of our hearts beating together. It’s so soothing. I’m forgetting my all trauma in his warm arms.
After a few moments, Alex pulls back just enough to look into my eyes. “How’s Olivia?” he asks, his voice laced with worry.
“She’s fine now,” I reassure him, giving him a small, comforting smile.
He brushes a hand against my cheek. “And you, Flower? How are you holding up?”
I open my mouth to say I’m fine, but the words catch in my throat. I can’t lie to him. He sees right through me. I’m not fine. I’m as shattered as he is. Instead of answering, I just hug him, pressing my face into his shoulder.
“Your presence is enough for me too,” I murmur, hugging him tighter. “It’s the only thing that makes me feel… better.”
He places a tender kiss on the top of my head, threading his fingers through my hair. “Then let’s make each other feel even better.”
Without another word, he rises from the window, lifting me effortlessly, his hands gripping my buttocks as my legs wrap instinctively around his torso.
I hold him tightly as he carries me out to the beach just outside our room, saying, “You’re the only thing keeping me sane, Stella. The only reason I haven’t lost my mind completely. I… I love you so fucking much.”
“I love you more, Alex.” His steps falter when the words leave my lips.
Finally, I say the words he has been waiting to hear for so long. For a second, he just stands there, holding me, staring into my eyes as if he’s making sure he heard me right.
I’d planned to confess my love on my birthday, but God had another plan. But I wish my confession could take away his all pain.