Dahlia’s POV
Twenty-two hours. That’s how long I’d spent assisting with the labor and delivery of the pack’s newest set of twins. After three years of training under Dr. Winslett to become the pack’s midwife, I was more than prepared to handle any unexpected complications. But aside from the long labor and the extra effort it took to bring two pups into the world, everything had gone smoothly.
By all accounts, I should be utterly exhausted after pulling an all-nighter without rest. And maybe the crushing fatigue would hit me the moment I stepped anywhere near my bed. But right now, I felt strangely energized. My wolf, Blue, was practically vibrating with excitement inside my mind, leaving me restless. Since sleep wasn’t an option yet, I decided to take advantage of the endorphin high and walk home, stretching my legs.
“Blue, what is with you today?” I asked, feeling her buzzing energy mixing with my own. “I know you love meeting newborns, but you’ve been up all night too. You should be just as drained as I am.”
“I don’t know. I can’t explain it,” she murmured, her voice laced with anticipation. “I just have this feeling… something exciting is going to happen today.”
I snorted. “More exciting than delivering twins? Because I don’t think I can handle any more surprises.”
“Meeting our mate and having pups of our own! Now that would be exciting!” Blue declared, her enthusiasm a sharp contrast to my exhaustion.
“Please don’t start with that again. I’m too tired to argue,” I huffed.
“It doesn’t have to be an argument,” she grumbled but finally fell silent, retreating into the back of my mind.
It was the same discussion we’d had at least a thousand times. No matter how many times I reminded her what it was like to lose a mate-how I let her feel every shred of the pain-I could never make her give up on the idea.
I understood her longing. I really did. Witnessing moments like tonight-where love, joy, and new life filled the air-made the exhausting, unpredictable hours of being a midwife worthwhile. And, for a fleeting moment, it almost made me want that kind of love and family for myself. Almost.
But I knew better.
The reality was, not everyone cherished the Goddess-given gift of a fated mate. There were too many ways it could go wrong.
Sure, betrayal between fated mates was rare. Most wolves cherished their bond, unwilling to do anything that could bring their mate pain. But rare didn’t mean impossible.
Some of us fought against that pull. Some of us refused to let fate dictate our lives. And I intended to be one of them. My stubborn wolf, of course, had other ideas. But in the end, she’d see that I was right.
She just needed time to accept it.
Blue still clung to the dream of finding our destined mate, but I silently prayed we never would.
Because my past had already proven how dangerous a mate bond could be. It had shattered me in ways I wasn’t sure I could ever heal from. And I couldn’t take that risk again-not when there wasn’t enough of me left to survive it.
I learned that lesson the day my mother died.
I was sixteen. One moment, she was fine. The next, she was gone. No warning. No explanation. Just… gone.
Wolves don’t die like that. We don’t get sick. We heal. We survive wounds that would be fatal to humans. Cancer, heart disease-those things don’t touch us.
Yet my mother had died without reason.
Dr. Winslett had performed an autopsy, searching for answers. He found none. His best guess was that she had some rare, undetected genetic disorder. But it was just that-a guess.
That was five years ago, and I still mourned her every single day. But no matter how much I suffered, it was nothing compared to the grief that destroyed my father.
Losing a mate could be a death sentence. Some wolves simply couldn’t bear the agony and followed their mate into the afterlife. I knew my father wanted to-Goddess, I knew-but he stayed. For me. He endured every agonizing day because he refused to leave me behind.
I thought losing my mother was the worst pain I would ever feel. But it was nothing compared to the sound of my father sobbing himself to sleep night after night.
He tried to hide it. He never let me see him break. But I saw him in other ways-sitting in my mother’s favorite chair, staring at her picture, lost in memories. Wishing he could be with her.
Over time, he found a way to go on. To the outside world, he seemed like a man who had moved forward, who had healed. But I knew better. I wasn’t sure he’d ever be whole again.
And that was why I made my choice.
I refused to give anyone the power to destroy me like that.
“I lost our mother too, you know.” Blue’s voice was softer now, filled with an aching sorrow that mirrored my own. “I may have been newly born to you, but I share your memories. I felt our father’s grief just as you did. But that doesn’t mean it will happen to us.”
“Maybe not. But you know that’s not the only reason.” My voice was sharper than I intended, frustration bubbling to the surface.
“Yes. But HE was never meant for us. You should have walked away before he ever had the chance to hurt us.” Her words struck deep, and I clenched my jaw.
“That’s not fair, and you know it.”
“Neither is denying me the chance to be with my mate.” Her voice wavered, equal parts anger and longing.
I exhaled sharply. “That’s enough. This conversation is over.”
With a firm shove, I forced her to the back of my mind and shut her out.