Ryan’s POV
As I got back to Shadowhaven with Karen, I immediately had a brief meeting with my elders about the Rouges. They were getting out of hand by attacking the innocents and reaping them of their belongings.
After some hours of analysing what should be done, everyone departed to their various homes and I was left alone.
I leaned back in my chair, staring at the stack of papers on my desk. The elders had been relentless tonight, arguing over boundaries and patrol schedules like children fighting over a toy. I’d settled it, of course…that’s what I do, but the weight of their expectations was starting to grate on me.
I rubbed the back of my neck and sighed. Finally, I could retreat to my room and forget about the pack’s endless demands, at least for a little while.
The castle was quiet, the kind of silence that let my mind wander to places I didn’t want it to go. Aurora. Her name slipped into my thoughts unbidden, as it often did these days. That girl was like a storm, one that had shaken me to my core without warning.
There was something about her. The defiance in her eyes when she spoke, the vulnerability she tried so hard to hide, and the way she carried herself despite the bruises marring her delicate skin. It was maddening.
I shouldn’t be thinking about her, not like this. She was young, fragile even, yet there was a fire in her that drew me in, a fire that made me want to protect her from everything, even herself.
I tried to steady my breathing, I tried to calm my racing heart, but everything about her just made my body react, aching for her.
Little one, I thought, leaning back in my chair. What are you doing to me?
The memory of her lying unconscious in my arms flashed through my mind, and I clenched my fists. She didn’t belong in a world as cruel as this. I wanted her safe, far away from the chaos that followed me. But the truth was, I didn’t want her far away at all.
Before I could dwell on it further, I shook my head and stood, pushing the thoughts aside. I had enough on my plate without letting her distract me. The elders had been insufferable tonight, and I needed rest before they came knocking again.
****
When I opened the door to my room, I stopped dead in my tracks.
Karen was there, lounging on my bed, her silk nightgown clinging to her in all the right places. Her dark hair fell in soft waves over her shoulders, and she looked up at me with a small, apologetic smile.
“Ryan,” she said softly, sitting up.
“Karen,” I replied, my voice colder than I intended. “What are you doing here?”
She stood, walking toward me with slow, deliberate steps. “I came to please you tonight.”
I raised an eyebrow, crossing my arms. “Please me? What are you talking about?”
“I was acting immature earlier,” she admitted, her tone a mix of guilt and determination. “When I asked why you were looking at someone else… I shouldn’t have. It was nothing, and I overreacted. I was jealous, and I’m sorry.”
Her words caught me off guard, but I didn’t let it show. Karen was beautiful, and any man would have been lucky to have her, but…
“Karen,” I began, but she cut me off.
“Let me finish,” she said, stepping closer. “I know I’m just your acting Luna and we’re not married yet but we will in due time. I know this relationship isn’t what it’s supposed to be. But I want to fix it. I want us to grow together, to make this work, so we can get married and give your pack the Luna they need.”
Her words were sincere, and for a moment, I felt a pang of guilt. Karen had been through hell. She’d lost her mate, my best friend…. years ago in a war that left scars on all of us.
“You know why I can’t do this,” I said, my voice low.
“Because of him,” she replied, her voice trembling. “Because of your best friend. I know, Ryan. I know how much he meant to you, but he’s gone. I loved him too, but I can’t keep mourning him forever. I have to move on, and so do you.”
I looked away, the weight of her words pressing down on me.
“Being with you feels like betraying him,” I said quietly. “He was my brother, Karen.”
“And I was his mate,” she said, tears welling in her eyes. “Do you think I don’t feel it too? But he’s not coming back, Ryan. He’s gone, and I’ve spent years trying to pick up the pieces of my life. I thought… I thought maybe we could help each other.”
Her voice cracked, and she wiped at her eyes. “I’m not asking for much. Just… give this a chance. Please.”
I let out a slow breath, running a hand through my hair. “Karen, you deserve better than this. Better than me.”
“Don’t say that,” she said, stepping closer. “I’m not giving up on us, Ryan. Not yet.”
“I like you Karen, we’ve been friends since childhood, but I don’t love you. When will you understand?” I said, feeling guilty for even saying that to her. My wolf, Draven, was calm as he felt the same thing I was feeling-guilt, because he is never calm.
She reached out, her fingers brushing against my arm, but I pulled back slightly. Her face crumpled, and she quickly stepped away.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, turning toward the door. “I just… I just want you to be happy.”
She left before I could respond, her scent lingering in the room. I sat on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands. I hated hurting her, but pretending would only make things worse.
And yet, as I sat there, all I could think about was Aurora.
****
The next morning, I tried to shake off the heaviness of the night before. As I walked through the castle, pack members bowed in respect, their murmurs barely registering.
“He’s looking even better today,” I overheard one of the maids say, her voice hushed.
“Careful,” another replied. “You’ll get caught.”
I ignored them, making my way to the dining hall. Karen was there, as expected, setting up breakfast with a determined look on her face.
“Good morning,” she said, her tone neutral.
“Karen,” I greeted, sitting down.
“I’m sorry about last night,” she said, pouring me a cup of tea. “I shouldn’t have pushed you. I just… I want us to move forward.”
I nodded, not trusting myself to say anything.
Before the conversation could go further, a sudden mindlink interrupted my thoughts.
Alpha, came the voice of one of my pack members stationed in the human world. There’s someone here asking for you. She said her name is Aurora.
Aurora.
I shot up from my seat, startling Karen.
“Ryan?” she asked, her voice full of concern. “What’s going on?”
“I have to go,” I said, already heading for the door.
“Wait…I’ll come with you,” she called after me.
“No,” I said firmly, not looking back. “Stay here.”
“Ryan!”
But I didn’t stop. My heart raced as I made my way to the gates.
What are you doing here, little one? I thought, my chest tightening as her name echoed in my mind.