264

AIR I was beginning to count down the days until my due date.
I felt like a rhinoceros and finding a comfortable position at night was almost impossible. I leaned my side against the kitchen table; even standing was a problem now.
Luca entered the kitchen and kissed me on the lips. “How are you ?”
He had been almost constantly by my side, ever since the incident that had prompted Demetrio to pull down the blinds and push me away from the windows. Luca had not told me the details, but it must have worried him deeply because Matteo had taken care of most of the business in the weeks that followed. Only in the last two weeks had Luca begun to relax a little.
“I’m hungry.” I always had been. If at first food had been a struggle, now eating was all I could do. Fortunately, I had not gained much weight. I thanked my good genes.
Luca touched my belly. “And how is he?”
I put my hand on his. “She’s very active. She doesn’t let me sleep much at night.”
“I know. Soon the pregnancy will be over.”
“I doubt we’ll sleep better then.”
Luca stroked my belly with his thumb.
Footsteps were heard, he straightened and retracted his hand a moment before Demetrius turned the corner, then froze. “Are you staying home today?”
Luca could not show this kind of kindness in front of his men. At least he didn’t hide his feelings too much when Matteo was around.
“No,” Luca said. “I have to meet the captains.”
I touched his chest briefly with my fingertips, over his heart and tattoo. Be careful. My eyes told him, and he knew it.
He gave me a brief, possessive kiss before leaving.
I grabbed a book and went out into the garden of the villa, with Demetrius following me. Gianna and Lily were already sunbathing in the late June sun, but I could not take the heat in my state for long. I missed New York, but after the ‘accident Luca had insisted that I stay in our villa. However, now that the delivery date was approaching, I would have to return to New York in the next two days, since that was where the hospital Luca had chosen was located.
I managed to free myself from my dress and dropped onto one of the lounge chairs with a groan. My bikini bottoms were hidden by my belly, and for a moment I wondered if I had worn them properly.
Gianna lifted her sunglasses and exchanged an amused look with Lily.
“Wait until you’re pregnant and can’t move anymore,” I muttered as I stretched, groaning again.
“I have absolutely no intention of getting pregnant, trust me . Neither Matthew nor I want children.”
Lily bit her lip. “I’d love to have children with Romero, but we’ll wait a few years until I’m a little older.”
I never thought I would become a mother at twenty-three , but now I was happy.
Gianna looked at Demetrio, sitting at the garden table in the shade. “Aren’t you hot in that outfit?”
He was wearing a black long-sleeved shirt and black jeans and looked up confused. “I’m not here for fun.”
Gianna huffed. “Heaven forbid anyone should have fun around here.”
I laughed. “Leave him alone.”
Demetrio gave me a grateful smile, then returned to letting his gaze wander over the premises. I fell asleep with the sun on my face, but eventually woke up because Marcella unleashed a storm. I blinked to protect myself from the sun. “What time is it?”
“I have no idea,” Gianna said, lowering a book she was reading. I looked out toward the ocean, wondering if we would be able to return to Italy next year. These last few weeks of confinement in the villa had made me long for the vast expanse of the sea.
“When was the last time you were out?”
Gianna asked, looking at me worriedly.
“I’m out now.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Romero said it’s best for Aria’s pregnancy to remain secret, even though people speculate that Aria had a mental breakdown marrying Luca.”
I gave her a sidelong glance. “What?”
Lily grimaced. “Because you’ve been missing from the public for the past four months. There’s a rumor that you’re in rehab or a psychiatric facility, and another that Luca is locking you up because you’re simply too beautiful and can’t stand others looking at you.”
“What a load of crap,” Gianna muttered. “That sounds like a rumor Matteo might spread just for laughs.”
I closed my eyes, laughing softly. “I think I prefer the rumor about beauty to the one about insanity.” Then I lowered my gaze to my protruding belly. “Although I don’t feel very beautiful right now.”
“Once you push that baby out, you’ll have your old body back in no time,” Gianna said.
“At least Luca isn’t taking a purse out of solidarity,” Lily said with a smile. “I read that many men gain more weight than their wives during pregnancy. It’s called solidarity pregnancy or something like that.”
“This is taking solidarity a little too far,” Luca said from behind me, and I let out a cry of surprise, looking over my shoulder. He was standing with his arms crossed over his chest and wearing only his swimsuit.
Supportive pregnancy? No, this had definitely not happened to Luca. He was as muscular as ever, all muscle, no fat.
Matthew walked up to his brother, smiling, and patted his six-pack belly. “I think I feel a little bulge.”
“The only bulge I’ll ever have is in my pants, and you keep your hands away from there.”
“Stop talking about bulges, will you?” muttered Gianna.
Matthew leaned over her; he, too, was wearing only his swimsuit. “Why? You love my bulge.”
“Okay,” I said, wrinkling my nose, and tried to sit up. A beetle on my back had more freedom of movement than I did. Luke held out his hand, a smirk played on his mouth, but there was something fierce and protective in his eyes as usual when I showed my current vulnerability.
Sighing, I let him pull me to my feet. I touched his muscular stomach. “I almost wish you had gained weight so I wouldn’t feel so gigantic.”
Luca leaned down, one hand on my belly. “Aria, don’t be ridiculous. You’re beautiful and still small.” I was about to protest, but his gaze silenced me.
I couldn’t find a comfortable position. The pain in my lower back had worsened over the past week, and it was especially severe that night. I repositioned the nursing pillow under my belly, then closed my eyes, trying to sleep . It was only 10 o’clock, but by then I was tired all the time. The official delivery date was still five days away, but time seemed to drag on now that the birth was approaching.
I must have dozed off when a sharp pain in my lower abdomen jolted me awake. I opened my eyes suddenly and gasped . I lifted my arm to sit up , but with the pain it proved doubly difficult . When I finally managed to perch on the edge of the mattress, I had to catch my breath. I wasn’t sure if this was it. From the intensity of the pain, I could only assume I was having contractions.
I patted my stomach, waiting for the pain to subside before reaching for my cell phone on the nightstand. I thought about calling Luke, but I knew he had a meeting that evening with his soldiers about a strategy to burn down the Bratva labs and probably something else he hadn’t told me about.
I didn’t want to bother him if it turned out to be a false alarm. I hesitated, then decided to send him a message.
When are you coming home?
I managed to send it to him before another contraction made me a hissing mess. Clutching the mattress, I tried to breathe despite the pain. This was not working as well as I had hoped. “Demetrius!” I called when I found my voice again. I pushed myself out of bed and stealthily approached the door, the phone clutched in one hand. It was vibrating. I cast a glance at the screen.
Two hours. Are you okay?
I reached the door and clung to the handle for a couple of beats before I managed to open it.
“Demetrius!”
He appeared on the stairs, his hair tousled and his face sleepy. He must have fallen asleep. “Are you all right?”
“Of course not, otherwise I wouldn’t have called you,” I muttered , then felt guilty for pouring out my pain on him, but another contraction prevented me from apologizing.
Demetrius’ eyes opened wide. “Are you…?”
“Call Gianna,” I ordered, when it became clear that Demetrio had no idea what to do. Demetrio ran to the elevator and pressed the button, but without the code he would not have been able to send the elevator to Matteo’s apartment. Was I supposed to do everything myself?
I clung to the railing, intending to go down the stairs to help him in his vain attempt, but halfway down I had to stop to breathe again.
My cell phone vibrated again.
Aria? Are you okay?
I was clutching the phone so tightly that I was surprised it hadn’t turned to dust yet. “Call Matteo,” I said to Demetrio through clenched teeth.
I didn’t check to see if he had carried out my order, but a few minutes later the elevator swelled and Gianna rushed out, dressed in a bathrobe, followed by Matteo in boxers and T-shirt.
Gianna practically flew up the steps and stopped beside me. She froze with her hands almost touching me. “Aria?
What’s wrong? Is the baby coming?”
I swallowed an answer and nodded.
“Come on, we have to get you to the hospital,” he said, lightly resting his hand on my arm.
Matthew lingered on the first step and behind him was Demetrius, all of them looking at me as if they needed my guidance.
“I don’t think I can walk right now,” I said.
Gianna paled.
“Do something. You have to know what to do,” Matteo told her, taking another step forward.
“Why should I know? Because I’m a woman?”
Gianna hissed. “I have never pushed a baby out of my vagina, as you well know.”
Oh God. I really didn’t need their bickering now.
“Matteo, can you please help me?” I whispered. Gianna wasn’t strong enough to carry me, and I had a feeling I wouldn’t be able to walk much longer. He was going much faster than I had thought.
He immediately moved closer. “What do you want me to do?”
Another contraction and I rocked forward, clutching Matteo’s arms. He supported me. “Call Luca.”
“You have to let me go,” he said in a strained voice. Impossible . I needed something to hold on to, and Matteo could hold on to me better than Gianna. I squeezed his arms tighter, and he seemed to realize that I was not going to let him go.
Gianna pulled out her cell phone. “Yes, it’s Aria,” was the first thing she said. Of course Luca knew it was for me when Gianna called him. My message had probably made him panic.
“We’re taking her to the hospital.” He nodded, then ended the call and looked at me. “She’s already on her way.”
“Can you walk?” asked Matthew.
I gave a small nod, feeling a little stronger. I took a step down, Matteo’s grip tight on my arm. It took forever to walk down the remaining steps with Gianna, Demetrio, and Matteo looking at me as if I were a bomb about to explode.
Gianna’s phone rang. “No, we’re still at home. Aria is too slow.”
I looked at her frowning. Slow? I was surprised I could walk, so much so that it felt like my insides had been torn apart. I stopped to catch my breath. Matthew surprised me by wrapping one arm around my shoulders and tucking the other under my legs before lifting me into his arms. I knew it could not have been easy for him. I had gained almost thirty pounds during my pregnancy. I wasn’t big yet, but I certainly wasn’t a lightweight anymore.
“Thank you,” I murmured.
His dark eyes softened. Matthew and I had had our conflicts, but I knew he would get me safely to the hospital.
“Everything will be fine,” Gianna assured me. It would have been more convincing if she didn’t sound like she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
“I’ll get the car,” Demetrio said, then disappeared into the elevator . The devil seemed to be chasing him.
“Hey!” called Matteo, but the doors had already closed and he was on his way down, leaving us stuck in the penthouse until the elevator returned. “What the fuck is he doing?”
Gianna pressed the elevator button repeatedly, but it was still descending to the underground garage.
“What the fuck is the car doing there? It’s parked right next to the elevator doors, by the way. Idiot.”
“He’s nervous,” I said softly, enjoying a moment of almost no pain, but then another contraction stiffened my spine and I cried out, arching into Matthew’s grip. He staggered and stiffened.
“Fuck,” he growled, and Gianna pressed the button again, as if violence ever made a technical device work faster.
“Will you be able to keep the baby inside until we’re in the hospital?” asked Matteo worriedly.
I rolled my eyes. He made it look like I could close the door there. “I don’t know.”
“Finally!” exclaimed Gianna as the elevator reached our floor and the doors opened, and my heart leapt with relief. Luca towered inside and his worried gray eyes framed me. Without a word, he walked toward Matthew and took me from his brother. Luca held me to his chest as if I weighed nothing. He lowered his face and kissed me softly before heading toward the elevator. I could feel his heartbeat speeding up, but his face was calm, which calmed my worries. With him by my side, everything would be fine.
“Where is Demetrius?” asked Matteo.
“I sent him to the hospital to make sure he was safe,” Luca said, never taking his eyes off my face, and I supported his gaze because the pain seemed more bearable that way. Matteo opened the door of his Porsche Cayenne for us, but when Luca was about to lay me down in the back seat, a very strong contraction ran through my body. I squirmed, closed my eyes, and let out a small cry.
“You are strong, Aria,” Luca murmured against my forehead. “And I am here for you. I wish I could take away your pain.”
I looked at him through half-lidded eyelids. I inhaled and exhaled, seeking comfort in his gentle eyes. When he felt me relax, Luke put me in the back seat, then climbed behind me so that I was leaning against his chest. Matteo and Gianna sat in the front, and Matteo drove his car like a madman.
We arrived at the hospital with the baby still inside, but I was immediately taken to the delivery room. “Give her something for the pain,” barked Luca the moment the first doctor crossed our path. I only heard something like “too late” before another wave of pain overshadowed everything else.
Luca brushed my hand with his lips as I clung to him during each contraction. I could find no more time to catch my breath between them, and I was at the top of what I could take.
Luca’s eyebrows were furrowed, his expression almost desperate. He frowned at the nurses. “Do something,” he growled .
“One last push,” encouraged the midwife.
I didn’t think I had the energy for another push, but then through the fog of agony, a cry rang out. My little girl. My daughter.
Luca’s eyes lowered to my face, then lower still.
I gave up in relief as the midwife lifted a tiny human being covered in blood. For a moment, Luca did not move, then he kissed my cheek and temple, an expression of astonishment on his face, and I let out an incredulous laugh. The midwife did a quick check before placing our daughter in my arms.
Luca let go of my hand so I could hold her. I stroked her sticky black hair. She had a lot of it, coal black like her father’s. I smiled at Luca, who was looking at our daughter with a frozen look on his face. “She has your hair,” I whispered as I inhaled her scent, trying to memorize it. Her eyes were still bluish-gray. It was hard to tell what color they actually were.
“She is so small,” Luca said softly. He made no gesture to touch her. He seemed almost afraid to do so. Perhaps the doctor and midwife who were still in the room with us had prevented him from showing his affection, but that had not stopped him from being affectionate with me.
“Marcella,” he murmured, and tears burned my eyes from the tenderness in his voice as he called our baby by name for the first time.
“Do you want to hold her?”
Luca’s eyes darted from Marcella to me, then he swallowed . “No.”
I frowned, my heart clenched at his refusal. “Why not?”
He lifted his strong scarred hands as if that would answer my question. “She is pure and fragile. I…”
“You won’t break her if that’s what you’re worried about,” I said softly, but he shook his head and grabbed my cheek.
“Hold her in your arms. She’s beautiful.”
I gave a small nod of assent, stifling my disappointment. Leaning forward, I brushed his lips with mine. “I love you.”
Luca cast a glance at the doctor, who was writing something in the corner of the room. I touched his hand to let him know that I understood he couldn’t tell anyone else in the room. I knew he loved me, he loved Marcella and me , no words were needed.
Luca did not leave us as we were taken to a private room after I had been stitched up. Shortly after we had settled in, Gianna and Matteo came in. I was tired and wanted to rest after the exhausting delivery, but they had waited a long time and I wanted to give them a chance to see Marcella.
Gianna came over to the bed to gently embrace me while Matteo held his brother in a hug. “I can’t believe you are a father now,” Matteo said with a smile.
Luca nodded as if he couldn’t believe it either, and his eyes returned to Marcella, who was sleeping in the crib next to my bed. He looked almost lost. I wasn’t sure what to do to help him.
I gestured toward the crib. “Why don’t you hold her, Gianna?”
Gianna straightened up but did not extend her hand toward Marcella.
“You know I’m not good with babies,” she said hesitantly.
I couldn’t believe it. Luca didn’t want to hold our daughter, and now Gianna didn’t want to hold her granddaughter either.
Matteo let out a sigh and walked over to the crib. Luca rocked forward as if he was about to stop his brother, but then he froze. Matteo must have seen him too, but ignored him . He slid his hand under Marcella as I sat on the bed.
“Make sure you support her neck. She still can’t keep her head up.”
Matteo looked up. Maybe he thought I was going to stop him, but Matteo and I had been getting along very well the last few months. I didn’t trust him the way I trusted Luca.
Not even close, but I knew he would protect Marcella. And then he lifted her from her crib and she opened her eyes wide, some saliva dripping from her lips and onto the sleeve of her shirt.
He didn’t seem to care.
“It is a miracle that humanity has survived with how fragile and useless our infants are,” Matteo reflected as he looked at my daughter.
“That’s because we make sure that no one has a chance to harm them. I think Marcella will be well protected,” I said, meeting Luke’s gaze. A fierce sense of protection was reflected in his eyes.
Luca and Matteo exchanged a look that made Gianna roll her eyes, but I smiled. If anyone had ever thought of hurting Marcella, I wished they would have met with Luca and Matteo’s full wrath.
LUCA Marcella had my hair. Whenever I had imagined our daughter, she looked like Aria: blond hair, blue eyes.
I had not thought that a part of me would be so blatantly reflected in her. I had not thought that she would have something of me. Aria was pure, kind and beautiful.
There were not many good qualities I could offer. But Marcella was stunning with her black hair. Pure perfection like her mother.
The moment I had seen her I had fallen in love, and seeing Aria with Marcella, I had loved my beautiful wife even more.
Both of them were my life. The light in my darkness, and I knew I would ruin it if I touched Marcella. She was fragile. I had never seen fingers and toes so small. I would have broken her. I would have contaminated her with my darkness.
Matteo held her without those reserves. He had as much blood on his hands as I did, he was as twisted and cruel as I was, but he held her, he held my daughter. I wanted to stop him, I didn’t want his murderous hands to touch my innocent daughter, but Aria’s expression had prevented me, and now I had to stand there while my brother cradled my daughter in his arms. I knew I would never have to worry about Marcella when Matteo was around. He would have defended her. He would have killed, maimed and burned to defend her, as I would have done. We both had our demons, but protecting our beloved was one of the few positive character traits we had.
Aria’s gaze burned a hole in my chest. She wanted me to be the one to hold Marcella. She gave me a reassuring smile, then yawned. She was pale and had lost a lot of blood.
“It’s time for you to go. Aria needs to rest,” I said.
Matthew laid Marcella down in her crib before going to Aria and hugging her, followed by Gianna. Then they slipped out, leaving us alone.
“You don’t have to stay,” Aria whispered.
I sneaked up to her, slipped off my shoes and crawled into bed with her. It was tight, even with Aria’s body snuggled against me. She gasped when she moved, and I was careful not to hurt her as I hugged her . “I will stay,” I said firmly. She placed her palm on my heart, as she often did. Sometimes I wondered if it was to reassure myself that I had a beating heart. I covered her hand with mine and she let out a sigh. “Whenever you are by my side, I know everything will be all right.”
“Go to sleep, princess. I will protect you.”
“And Marcella,” she added, half asleep.
“You and Marcella, until I die.”
Her breathing became more regular and I let my eyes close. Of course I wasn’t going to sleep. This was not our penthouse or our mansion. Romero and Matteo would make sure that there were men guarding the hallways, but I, too, had to be vigilant . Anyone who wanted to harm my wife and daughter would have to go through me.
The next day Aria was discharged. The doctors probably wanted us to leave so they would no longer have to deal with armed guards. I had seen how terrified they were of us.
Everyone knew what we were. I didn’t give a shit. I was glad to have Aria back in our penthouse, where she and Marcella were safer than in a public hospital, especially since I had bought the offices in the building across from our rooftop terrace and placed a sniper on top.
Aria was still not allowed to carry anything heavy because she was still in pain, so Matteo had to carry Marcella in his fanny pack. Aria did not comment, but Matteo was teasing me with his eyes. I knew he would bite my ear off later.
And I was right. By the time Aria and Gianna had settled on the couch and Marcella was sleeping in her crib next to them, Matteo cornered me in the kitchen as I was about to make coffee for us.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, Luca?” he muttered, coming right in my face. I looked at our wives, but they were deep in conversation.
“Stay out of my business.” I pressed the button on the coffee machine.
Matteo shook his head. “She’s your daughter. Why don’t you touch her? Even I can see that Aria is killing you to see you acting like a complete idiot.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Our father was a sadistic asshole, not a model of what it means to be a good father. I’m like him in so many ways, who’s to say I won’t be a shitty father too?”
Matthew laughed. He fucking laughed in my face. “Fuck.
Listen to yourself talking shit. You’re nothing like our father when it counts. He raped and beat our mother. You cut off your arm because you didn’t want to force Aria on your wedding night. You treat her like a queen and you will treat your daughter like a princess. Now cut the crap, Luca.”
“For heaven’s sake, Matteo, you make it sound like I’m a saint. You know me.”
“Saint, sinner, like I give a damn.” Matteo sneered. ” I know you. I know you like killing, you like spilling blood as much as I do. I know you like to tear our enemies and traitors to pieces. I know you like to be feared. You like their screams and pleas. You are a sick fuck like me, but you are a sick fuck who loves his wife and daughter, and who would rather spill his own blood and cut off his limbs than hurt them.”
I pushed the full coffee cup toward Matthew without a word and took a sip from my black coffee. I didn’t think I would live to see the day when Matteo would be the voice of reason for both of us. I didn’t like that at all. “We’ll see how you handle it when you become a father.”
Matteo shook his head. “Gianna and I don’t want children right now, maybe never.”
I raised my eyebrows in surprise, but I didn’t have a chance to ask him because Romero and Lily arrived for lunch.
After greeting Aria and glancing at Marcella, Romero approached Matthew and me, shaking my hand with a smile. “Congratulations. Your daughter is beautiful.”
She was, as beautiful as Aria.
Aria looked up and met mine, her lips lifted at the corners.