Gianna Matteo was in the front row, his dark hair shaggy and wet from the storm raging outside, his white shirt stuck to his upper body. At that moment, I felt almost a fool to think that I could ever forget him. He was more of a man than all the boys I had met put together. His dark eyes settled on me, then on my hand, which was still pressed against Sid’s groin . There was really no doubt what he had run into, and his face contorted in fury.
“What the fuck, guys?” shouted Sid. ‘Shut up Shut up’ I wanted to scream. I didn’t get the chance. Matthew in a few steps crossed the room, grabbed Sid by the arm and pulled him away from me. Sid landed violently on the floor, his face distorted with pain, then anger. Matteo towered over me, his nostrils flared, his eyes almost black, and a look that made me want to hide. I met his gaze directly. He wanted to scare me. My fear was something I would never give him. Sid stumbled up and almost lost his fucking pants.
He must have opened them at some point to make it “easier” for me. He headed toward Matthew. I leapt to my feet, knowing that I had to intervene before things got even worse . “Get out of this apartment or I’m calling the damn cops,” Sid said. God, no. Matteo gave me a look that made me realize how dangerous that situation was. Not for me, but for someone who should never have let himself be drawn into the fucking misery that was mob life. “He doesn’t mean it,” I blurted out. Sid glared at him.
“I fucking do.” For the moment he seemed to have forgotten his peaceful ideals. Matteo had not yet drawn his weapons.
I wanted to convince myself that this was a good sign, but one look at the two men with him made my heart sink into my shoes.
They were both my father’s men and they had already closed the door and stood there beside it with expressionless faces. A closed door was never a good thing.
Nothing I could have said would have changed their minds because they were acting on my father’s orders. They were going to do what he told them. There was only one person who could help me now. Sid went straight into Matteo’s face as if he wanted to punch him.
Matteo did not even move, he just stared at Sid with the scariest look I had ever seen in anyone’s eyes. Even without knowing who Matteo was, Sid must have sensed how dangerous the man in front of him was. Sid took a step back, his eyes darting between Matteo and me. I flinched and stepped between Matteo and him.
“He doesn’t know anything. Please let him go.”
My father’s men laughed and one of them muttered something that sounded a lot like “slut.” Matthew’s expression darkened even more. My father’s men watched him expectantly. I had insulted Matthew by running away , and worse by being with another man. In our world there was only one thing a man in Matteo’s position could do to protect his honor. I had only ever seen Matteo with some variation of an arrogant smile on his face, but now there was no trace of amusement.
“I should probably go,” Sid said suddenly, backing away . “This has nothing to do with me.”
Coward. The moment the thought crossed my mind, I felt sick. Running was really the only sensible thing for him to do. He could not protect me from Matthew or my father’s men, but that he had not even tried was something I could never understand.
One of my father’s men, Stan or something if I remembered him correctly, grabbed Sid by the arms. Sid began to struggle like a madman, but it was obvious that he had never fought in his life. Stan laughed, abruptly yanked Sid’s arms backward, then planted his knees in his back. With a cry, Sid fell to his knees, supported only by Stan’s grip.
“HEY! Stop it,” I shouted, wanting to run toward them, but Matthew grabbed my arm, making me stop. I turned toward him, about to growl in his face, but I stopped. It was Sid’s only chance, as ridiculous as it sounded.
“Please,” I said, though pleading left a bitter taste in my mouth. Matthew’s dark eyes did not even blink as he scrutinized me. Expecting him to help me after what I had done was absurd. “Don’t kill him. Just let him go.
He’s not a danger.”
“Do you want me to spare the asshole who put his hands on you? You let that fool have what is mine and you want me to let him go? Is that what you want from me?” asked Matteo in a dangerously quiet voice.
I swallowed a nasty retort. I was not his; I would never be his. Nothing I had done with Sid was Matteo’s business. Even if I had fucked Sid, it still wouldn’t have been his business. Even if I had fucked every single guy I had met, it still wouldn’t have been his business. I had to tell him that I hadn’t slept with Sid. Maybe it would placate him if he knew that I had not revealed everything . His ego would wish there was still something he could get me. Pride kept my lips sealed.
“We should get out. Someone might have heard when we broke down the door. Let’s get rid of this asshole and move on,” Stan said, hitting Sid again with his knee on the back . Sid’s eyes were huge as they fluttered back and forth between us.
“Quiet,” Matteo said abruptly, and Stan shut his lips tightly.
I took Matteo’s arm, sinking my fingers into the damp fabric of his shirt, feeling the hard muscles underneath. I had to put my damn pride aside if I wanted to save Sid’s life. “Matteo, it’s not…”
My words were interrupted by the sonorous crackle of a suppressed gunshot. I remained frozen as my eyes flew to the source of the noise. The other Made Man was aiming a Glock with a silencer at the spot where Sid’s head had been moments earlier. He was slumped forward, his head hanging limp and blood dripping onto the ground. Stan let go of Sid’s arms. The body toppled over and fell to the ground with a resounding thud. I stared and stared. Slowly my hand slid down Matthew’s arm.
“Did I give you the bloody order to kill him?” growled Matteo .
“This was a matter of Outfit. As long as she’s not married to you, she falls under our jurisdiction, and so does that asshole here.” Stan kicked Sid’s lifeless form. I gasped.
Inside was a raging beast, it wanted to gouge Stan’s damn eyes out, wanted to kill them all, but I was paralyzed.
Blood spread around Sid’s head, soaking his dreadlocks. My stomach clenched. I had seen so much blood only three times before. The first time when Luke cut off Raphael’s finger, the second time: on Luke’s shirt after he had dealt with the guy who had drugged Aria, and the third time when the Russians had attacked us. It was no easier as some people said, as I had also suspected. I had a feeling it would never happen.
Stan nodded toward me. “What about the other witnesses? You don’t live here alone.”
I blinked, terror gripping me so hard I could barely breathe. I couldn’t let them kill my roommates, too. The girls had been nothing but kind to me. They didn’t deserve this. My eyes found Matteo. His gaze scanned my face before turning to my father’s men. “We’re done here.”
Stan looked like he wanted to protest, but the other boy elbowed him in the shoulder. Throwing me a dirty look, Stan opened the door and checked the hallway. “Clear. Let’s go.”
I turned again to Sid’s body. Matthew passed an arm around my waist. I didn’t look his way. I could not look away from Sid as if my attention was the only thing that anchored him to life. He was long gone. Bits of his brain dotted the Red Sea on the ground.
Matthew led me toward the door, then down the hall. Stan was in front of us, while the other man formed the rear guard. Surrounded. I was surrounded. I should have tried to escape. The odds had always been against me. It had never stopped me before. Perhaps this was my last chance to escape. Once back in the United States, I would be trapped.
Surrendering was not in my nature. I have always fought my battles, but so far I had to pay the price for my courage. That night, an innocent person, someone who had never been tainted by the darkness of my world, had paid with his life for my dreams, for my desire for freedom, for my selfishness. I thought I could escape fate, escape a world of blood, but I had inadvertently dragged innocents into that world.
Could I live with it?
I wasn’t sure.
Perhaps it was in our nature to bring misery and death to everyone around us. Perhaps that was why it was best to stay among ourselves. Hadn’t Aria said something like that a long time before?
Aria. I was finally going to see her again. This was the good news I was clinging to right now. She would help me get through this. It always did.
Matteo’s grip on my wrist was painful. His eyes contained a clear message: now that he had caught me, he would never let me escape again.