I was not sure what had woken me up, but when I opened my eyes, the sun had not yet risen. The sky was already illuminated in the distance and provided enough light to distinguish my surroundings, but that was all. Dante was pressed against my back, his face half buried in my shoulder, his breath warm against my skin. It was uncomfortably hot but I did not pull away. This was the first time I woke up with Dante still in bed and really holding me in his arms.
Perhaps his subconscious had accepted what he could not;
that he wanted to be close to me.
I kept my breathing even, tried to look asleep, so as not to wake him. I must have dozed off again because I jolted awake when Dante moved away from me. I listened to him carefully, but he did not get out of bed. He had drifted away from me in his sleep, judging by his rhythmic breathing. I turned slowly to the other side so I could see him. He lay on his back, one arm raised over his face. The sheets were pulled down to the delicious V of his hips. I leaned on one arm, careful not to make a sound. My fingers itched to stroke his blond hair back, to tickle the ridges of his taut stomach, to follow the trail of fine hair to his erection.
I hesitantly reached out and lightly brushed my fingers over his hair. Dante’s hand snapped very quickly, grabbing my wrist in a crushing grip. At the same time he sat up and his eyes met mine. I tightened my lips. He let go of my wrist suddenly. I rubbed it, lowering my gaze to the bruises that were already forming. Dante touched my bare waist, his hand warm and light on my skin. “Did I hurt you?” There was real concern in his voice.
I looked up, surprised. “It’s okay. I scared you.”
He grabbed my hand and examined the marks his tight grip had left on my wrist. His thumb brushed my skin with a feather-light touch. “I’m not used to waking up next to someone anymore.”
It was the most personal thing he had ever shared with me. I had to restrain myself from digging deeper, from wanting more. “I know. It’s okay. You’ll get used to it.”
He looked up, but his fingers continued to lightly caress my wrist. “Did you and Antonio share a bed?”
“At first, yes. It was mostly for the sake of appearance.
We still had a maid then and we didn’t want her to get suspicious . At first it was like having a sleepover with a friend, but eventually it became awkward, especially when he came home smelling like his lover, so he fired the maid and we started sleeping in separate rooms.”
His eyes lingered on my exposed breasts. “I can’t imagine a man looking at you and not wanting to have you for himself.”
I blushed with happiness, but decided to keep the mood light, worried that a more emotional response would force Dante to retreat again. “I think Antonio would have said the same thing about you. I think you could have been his type.
Dante laughed and his entire face transformed. “That’s not something I want to think about.”
I smiled. “I guess not.” I paused, curious. “What would you do if one of your men came to you and admitted he was gay?”
“I would tell him to keep his nature a secret and fight it.”
“It’s not that people choose to be gay. They are gay or they are not. You would force your people to live a lie.”
“They can live in the lie, or they will have to live with the consequences.”
“You would kill someone for whom they love.”
“Society may have come a long way, but the mob is built on traditions, Valentina. The moment I declared that I would accept that Made Men was gay, all hell would break loose in Outfit. It would be a change that I would not be able to carry out. I would not kill someone for confiding in me, as long as they kept it secret. I don’t doubt that there are soldiers in the Outfit who are attracted to men but have learned to hold back. They are probably married and live a lie, but as long as they do they are safe.”
We were still sitting close together, talking in broad daylight. I reached for Dante’s chest, lightly brushing my fingertips over a long scar there. Dante grabbed my wrist, this time gently, and pulled my hand away. He slid his legs off the bed and stood up. I watched him head for the bathroom, completely naked, yet covered by hundreds of invisible layers that I could never penetrate.
I let my hand fall into my lap. With a sigh, I too got out of bed . There was no point in lying down alone. I had a busy day. My first day at the casino without Dante. I was anxious and excited at the same time. After a quick shower, I spent a ridiculous amount of time trying on different outfits. I didn’t want to look too sexy, but I also didn’t want to hide my femininity. I knew that those men, especially Raphael, didn’t like that a woman was now working with them, and worse:
their boss, and I was not going to make it easy for them . They needed to learn how to deal with strong women, and if they couldn’t, that was their problem. I chose a dark blue knee-length pencil skirt , matching slingback heels and a white blouse with a round neckline and long puffed sleeves. After tucking the hem of the blouse into the belt, I gathered my hair into a bun, letting some unruly locks fall .
When I entered the dining room, it was deserted. I paused on the threshold, letting my eyes rest on Dante’s usual place.
His newspaper was folded beside the empty plate. With a sigh, I headed back to my chair. The door opened and Gaby entered, carrying a pitcher with fresh orange juice and a coffee pot. She smiled brightly at me. “Good morning, Miss.
Valentina.” She gave an apologetic look but I just smiled, happy to see a friendly face in the morning. “I hope you slept well?”
My cheeks grew hot in an unwanted way. “Yes Thank you.”
He poured me coffee and orange juice. “Do you want eggs or pancakes?”
“No, I’ll just have a croissant and some fruit.” I pointed to the array of pastries and fruit in front of me.
Gaby turned to leave. “Wait,” I blurted, then blushed at how desperate I had sounded. Gaby looked at me with wide eyes, as if she feared she had done something to offend me and would be punished. “Why don’t you keep me company?”
Gaby froze.
“Only if you want to. I’d like to get to know you better.”
A shy smile spread across her face, but she did not sit down.
“You don’t have to stand. Sit down.” I took the chair next to mine. Gaby set down the carafe and coffee pot before sitting carefully in the chair.
“Have you had breakfast yet?”
Gaby hesitated, then shook her head.
“Then have a Danish. There’s more than enough food for the two of us.” I grabbed the basket and pushed it to her . He took a chocolate croissant murmuring a thank you and his cheeks turned red.
I took one for myself, took a bite and then followed it with a hot sip of coffee. I wanted to give Gaby some time to get over her nervousness. “Where do you live? I’ve been wondering since you told me your story.
“Oh, I live with Zita and her husband. They took me in shortly after I started working for Mr. Cavallaro.
“Do they treat you well?” Whenever I saw Zita, she was grim or frowning. She did not look like the person who should have been taking care of a girl like Gaby, who had experienced hell as a teenager.
Gaby nodded vehemently. “YES. Zita is strict but she treats me like family.” She put the last crumb of croissant in her mouth and swallowed before saying half-embarrassed. “She’s starting to take an interest in you. Zita always needs some time to get used to new people.”
“Really? She doesn’t seem to like me any more.”
Gaby shrugged slightly. “I’m sure she’ll change her mind soon.”
I couldn’t help but appreciate Gaby. She was being kind. I glanced at the watch on my wrist. “I have to leave now. I want to arrive early on my first day of work.
“Good luck,” said Gaby, getting up from her chair. “I think it’s great that you want to work. You’re the only woman of your status who doesn’t just stay at home. I mean, there’s nothing wrong with just being a wife.
I touched her shoulder briefly to show that I was not offended, then followed her to the staff area where Enzo was drinking coffee. When she saw me she immediately stood up . “You can finish your coffee. There is no hurry,” I told him. Despite my words, he took the cup and emptied it all in one go. Zita gave me disapproving glances . I certainly could not see her warming up to me. She had not yet said anything except an abrupt “good morning” , but I could tell she wished she had.
“In my day, a Chief’s wife would never have thought of working,” she murmured as she wiped down the already spotless counters.
“Times change,” I said simply.
“The late mistress, God rest her soul, was content in the role of mistress of the house. She spent her days trying to make her husband happy and make sure he had a good home.”
“Zita,” Enzo said abruptly. “That’s enough.”
Zita pointed a finger at him. “Don’t talk to me like that.”
“Maybe we should go out now,” I told Enzo. I didn’t want them to fight because of me. He nodded, grabbed the gun holster from the chair, and we walked in silence toward the garage.
“Thank you for speaking up for me,” I said as we sat in the car.
“Zita should show you respect. You are the Chief’s wife. He wouldn’t approve of anyone treating you like that.” Would he really care? “You should tell him.”
I shake my head. “NO. I can handle myself, but thank you.
Enzo tilted his head and the rest of the trip passed in silence. To my surprise, Enzo did not simply leave me at the casino. He followed me inside and did not move from my side. I had the feeling that Dante had told him to keep an eye on me. I wondered if it was because he didn’t trust his men to treat me decently or if he didn’t trust me not to mess up. Neither option made me feel any better.
Leo looked surprised when he saw me. “I wasn’t expecting you yet. Raphael and the girls haven’t arrived yet. There’s not much to do right now.”
I headed directly toward the back where the offices were located. “I know, but I want to read up on our high rollers. I assume you have documents and statistics on them?”
Leo’s eyes darted between me and Enzo, who had his arms crossed over his chest, as if waiting for an opportunity to crush Leo’s head. No friendship seemed to be lost between them. “Yes, we know. Let me get them for you.”
I settled down in the luxurious chair behind my desk, feeling out of place, but when Leo returned with folders full of papers, I held my head high and motioned for him to put them on my desk. “I will read them. Please let me know when Raphael and the girls arrive so I can talk to them.
Leo nodded and left without adding anything else. Enzo hesitated, then he too went out and closed the door behind him. I slumped in my chair and let my eyes wander around my windowless office. I picked up the first folder, determined to learn everything I needed to know to do a good job. I didn’t want to disappoint Dante. I knew he was risking the wrath of many Made Men by letting a woman do this job.
*** My eyes were burning from the dry air from the air conditioning, and I had only flipped through two folders when there was a knock on my door. “Come in,” I called in a hoarse voice. I cleared my throat as the door opened and Enzo peeped in.
“Raphael’s here. Should I let him in?”
I stifled a smile. Was Enzo now acting as my secretary?
“Yes Thank you.”
Enzo held the door wide open. Raphael entered with a fierce look in Enzo’s direction, who returned it with the same fervor. He closed the door and stood in front of it, his arms crossed and his gaze hard on Raphael. “Can’t you talk to me without your watchdog?” he asked with a wicked smile.
I straightened up. With my high heels I was as tall as he was, and I immediately felt more comfortable. “I could, but I won’t,” I said, making it sound like it was actually my decision and not an order from Dante.
Raphael seemed taken aback, but recovered quickly.
“You wanted to talk to the whores. They are getting ready in their dressing rooms.”
“Good. Lead the way.”
Raphael walked out without a word and headed for one of the doors leading to the main floor. Enzo was behind us. Raphael did not knock; he simply pushed the door wide open. Some of the girls gasped, surprised, but when they saw who it was they calmed down.
Apparently they were used to that kind of behavior on his part. Raphael made a mock broad gesture, inviting me into the locker room. “Careful,” Enzo hissed, bringing his face closer to Raffaele’s. “Or do you want to lose another finger? Dante won’t let you sew it back on.” Raphael turned red but did not dare retort anything nasty, although it was obvious from his expression that he wanted to.
I took a step into the locker room, then stopped. “Is it okay if I talk to you for a moment?” I asked the assembled girls. There were ten of them, ranging in age from late teens – that was at least what I hoped – to late thirties.
Some of them catered to the taste of the girl next door, the cheerleader, while others were more exotic. Almost all of them sported silicone breasts. Their expressions ranged from suspicious to worried to completely frightened. As if in choreography, their gazes sought out Raphael, silently seeking his permission. I could tell by the satisfied smile and the way he seemed to grow bigger how much he liked it.
“I want to talk to the girls alone,” I told him firmly.
“But…”
“No but,” I said at the same time that Enzo grabbed Raphael by the lapel and pushed him out, then followed him and closed the door so I was alone with the girls. I turned my full attention to the girls who had stopped what they were doing and were looking at me. “Maybe you can introduce yourself. Name, age, how long have you worked for Outfit.”
I pointed to a small Asian girl in the corner when it became clear that none of them wanted to start. After that they all seemed to relax and gave me their information without much prompting. To my relief, the youngest girl was already in her twenties, unless she was lying about her age.
“How are they treating you?”
Again silence.
“The Outfit treats us very well,” said a girl named Amanda.
“I want the truth. Does Raphael treat you with respect?”
Some girls exchanged amused expressions and finally one of them said. “We are whores. Almost no one treats us with respect. Raphael is no exception.”
“He’s not the worst.”
“That’s your opinion, not mine.”
“Oh shut up.”
I raised my arms and the girls fell silent. “All right. Who is worse than Raphael?”
“Some customers beat us up. And Tommaso wants bad things too. It wasn’t a surprise. Bibi didn’t tell me everything but the few things she had told me about her sex life with Tommaso had turned my stomach.
“I like it brutal.”
“You like it all, I don’t.”
“Oh, get over yourself. They buy your body and then decide what to do with it.
“You look like Raphael.”
“All right, all right,” I said slowly. “What exactly is Raphael doing?”
“He’s like our pimp. He tests us before deciding if we are good enough to work here. And he makes sure we make the customers happy. And if we don’t, he punishes us.”
“I assume the tests mean he’s sleeping with you?”
“Fucking us the way he likes is more like it.”
“And what exactly does he do to punish you?” I asked, but the bruises the girls were about to cover with makeup before my entrance gave me a good idea.
“He slaps us or fucks us really hard. Or he sends us to one of the brothels on the outskirts of town.
“The customers there are the worst. They are drunk, brutal and fat.
I took a deep breath. “All right. Are there any good things you can tell me ?”
“The money is great. I can buy nice clothes and rent a great apartment. It’s something I could never do without this job.
Many of the girls nodded, and I tried to take comfort from that. They had all started working as prostitutes of their own free will and were making more money than most people with college degrees. I talked to them some more and asked them to tell me when a customer was too brutal. They had promised to do so, but I wasn’t sure if they were just saying that to get me off their backs. I would have to talk to Leo and Raphael about the situation.
When I came out of the locker room, Enzo was waiting for me. “Where is Raffaele?”
Enzo nodded in the direction of the bar. “He left with a pout. That boy would have been removed from the Outfit long ago if it weren’t for his father. Useless jerk.”
He closed his mouth. “I apologize for the foul language.”
“No need. I’ve heard worse.”
Surprise crossed his face. Happy to make progress with Dante’s men, I headed toward Raphael. He was perched on one of the bar stools, drinking what looked like a martini. “Isn’t it a little early to start with alcohol?”
Raphael emptied his glass. “We are the crowd, not a convent.”
“I would still appreciate it if everyone stayed clear-headed while working.”
“Maybe one glass is enough to get you drunk, but I know how to hold my alcohol. I’m not a spoiled woman.”
“Raphael,” Dante’s voice went through the room like a knife. I turned as Dante walked toward us, his body brimming with angry energy. His cold eyes were on Raphael, who quickly slid off the bar stool and stood up, a flicker of nervousness replacing that smug arrogance . Enzo smiled menacingly. I had a feeling he had kept Dante updated on how things had gone so far.
Dante stopped right in front of Raphael, staring at him with an expression of raw brutality. “If I hear one more word of disrespect from your mouth, I will tear you to pieces and feed you to your father’s dogs. Do you understand ?”
“Yes, boss,” Raphael said quickly. He turned to me. “I’m sorry if I offended you.” He sounded sincere but there was something vindictive and bitter in his eyes.
Dante finally looked up at me. “I would like to have a word with you.”
I stood by his side as we headed to my office and entered. Dante closed the door. Before he could say anything, I muttered, “Did Enzo call you?”
“Enzo didn’t need to call me. I had always intended to check on you. I want to make sure your first day went well.
I looked at him doubtfully.
“Why are you so surprised?”
“Because so far you haven’t seemed like a caring kind of husband.”
Dante said nothing, just looked at me with that disturbingly cold stare.
“I didn’t need you to defend me. I can handle myself,” I said when it was clear he wasn’t going to say anything.
Dante narrowed his eyes. “This is my territory. These are my men and it’s my job to keep them in line. If they disrespect you, it’s only a small step until they dare to disrespect me too. I will not allow that.”
“You have made me look incapable of doing my job. Raphael will think I am weak because I need you to protect me.”
Dante came very close, showering me with his aftershave.
“Valentina, the only reason these men respect you is because you are my wife. I know you don’t like that. I know you are strong, but you cannot demand dominance over these men as I do because you do not have the same weapons as I do.
“What weapons?”
“Cruelty, brutality and an absolute determination to kill anyone who questions my claim to power.”
I held my breath. “What makes you think I wouldn’t kill someone if I had to? Perhaps I am capable of the same brutality as you.”
Dante gave a joyless smile. “Maybe, but I doubt it.” He ran a finger down my throat. “Perhaps you would have had the potential to survive with the Outfit if you had been raised the same way boys are raised in our world. My father had me kill my first man on his orders when I was fourteen. A traitor whom my father had tortured before my eyes before I put a bullet in his head. After that, my father had one of his soldiers torture me to see how long I could endure the pain until I broke down and begged him to stop. I lasted less than 30 minutes. The second time I already lasted almost two hours. The tenth time my father had to stop the soldier otherwise I would have died. I did not beg, even to save my life. Be glad you never had a chance to build your cruelty, Valentina.
I had to swallow twice before I could speak. “It’s barbaric. How can you not hate your father for what he did to you?”