Aileen
I saw Marshall sitting in his car from a distance and suddenly recalled the hints he had given me all this
“I make you feel safe? Having you around made me safe enough to fall asleep.” His voice echoed in my head.
The reason why he brought me out to eat, and did everything as I said, was it because he’s been crushing on me for a while.
Then, what I thought of as friendship was just a mere facade I believed.
“Aileen, hurry up!” he yelled, waving at me.
I walked over to the side of his car and opened the door at the back.
“Don’t mind, I’d like to sit here,” I said, boarding in.
“Uh, sure.”
He started the car and we drove past his house premises.
We were silent, and I did not intend to start a conversation. I still find it hard to believe, that he out of all people out there confessed to me.
I don’t remember doing anything to make him like me. Then, how did things lead to this?
The more I thought, the more messed up it seemed to me. If ever Dave got to hear about it, I don’t know how he’d react. Or will he not say anything because he’s his Beta?
Why did he have to confess to me? Now, I can’t seem to act normal around him anymore. The thought that he sees me as a romantic interest will be the only thing on my mind.
Gosh….
“Alpha seems to be a bit stressed out lately because of work. Make sure he’s looking after his health,” Marshall remarks.
“Sure. But he’s hardly home.”
“I understand. I’m trying to send him home early but he’s not listening. Anyway, do you want to pick up a gift for your birthday? It’s approaching very soon.”
“For the birthday, oh…” I don’t think it’ll be possible for me to accompany him. He has to go alone.
“Uh, no. I think you can choose a gift on your own. You don’t need any help,” I replied, lowering my gaze. “And I’m going to be busy a bit. But, I’ll bring the decorations and everything and a separate gift…. if possible.”That is what I want to say. But, even that sounds too rude to me.
“The gift huh? Let’s see. I’ll inform you if I can. I’ll have classes back to back, so I’ll be busy. Still, I’ll try.”
“Becky considers you her very close person. I think you should know that.” He stated, looking at my reflection in the front mirror.
I know that very well, You don’t have to rub it in my face. And what the heck is this situation? You can’t force me to come into your house like that.
Things haven’t become normal between us yet. And it’s your fault.
After some gruesome minutes of silence, I managed to reach home.
I got out of the car and gave a little wave.
“Thanks for the ride, goodnight.”
“No worries, goodnight.”
I turned away to head back inside. I wish there was someone, someone who would understand what I’m feeling, what I’m going through. But, there’s none. And talking about it would make the situation worse for me.
Heading inside I saw Mom heading into the kitchen. Oh, Mom’s back.
I followed after her, she was baking something in the kitchen. The oven was on and the sweet aroma of something sweet filled my nostrils.
What is she making at this time?
Seeing me standing she greeted me, “Oh, Hi, When did you come back sweetie? I didn’t hear you.”
“Uh, a few minutes ago. Don’t worry about that. But, what are you making right now? Aren’t you tired? Shouldn’t you be resting?”
“Tired? Oh, no, no. Why would I be tired? I’m feeling pretty fine. In fact, I came home an hour ago, took a shower, found a perfect cookbook, and decided to try baking something. They are your favorite gingerbread cookies. I hope you’ll like them.”
She always remembers what I like, and shows how much tired she is around me. Even though I know how tired she is from inside.
Do all of us keep a pretense in front of our loved ones so as not to make them worry?
“Yeah, I’ll love them. How long will it take?”
“Hm…. 20 minutes? Go and change. I’ll keep aside some for Dave as well. He likes cookies like you.”
“Uh…yeah, I know.” He’s the one who used to give me cookies in the first place. We used to share some and eat them.
Though, you don’t know about it, do you?
After coming back from changing the cookies were ready. We were trying them on and noticed the time on the clock.
It was getting quite late but there were no signs of Dave coming back yet.
“He’s working late today as well,” Mom remarks, biting onto another cookie. “He’s the boss, that’s why no one is there to tell him to go back home.”
“Why not call him if you are so worried?” I replied, sipping on my hot cocoa.
“Call him? Yeah.”
She ran upstairs to get her phone while I already texted him, “How long are you planning to work today? Get back home. We have cookies.”
I sent him one picture of me eating cookies along with it.
I don’t think this bait is gonna work on him.
We sat in the living room watching TV with popcorn. I didn’t tell Mom about what I was dealing with.
And it’s not her concern anyway.
Half an hour later, the doorbell rang. Mom went to get the door and I turned off the TV. We ate dinner together but Dave seemed to be keeping an eye on me.
I was strolling around the study feeling a bit restless at night. It was then I heard footsteps behind me approaching.
I looked behind me only to see Dave coming.
My instinct was to turn away and leave, but that would look too suspicious so I stayed behind.
“Don’t you have to sleep? Why are you up at this time?” he asked, standing right beside me.
“No, I wasn’t feeling sleepy. That’s why I came to get fresh air. But, why are you here? Aren’t you exhausted from so much work?”
He laughed, and glanced at me, “Even if I am, why do you need to worry?”
What’s that supposed to mean?
“I…never said I was worrying. Just telling you to take care of your health a little.”
“Are you saying this out of sympathy towards me?” he teased. “Do you pity me?”
“What? Why would I be”
He pulled me by the arm and wrapped his arm around my back. Our eyes were locked with each other. And I could feel my throat going dry from all the tension I felt.
What is he trying to pull like this?
“There seems to be something wrong going on with you. What is that?” he asked, peering into my eyes.
Straight to the question? I should’ve stayed away from him.
“T-there’s nothing wrong with me. You are imagining it,” I stuttered, removing his hand away from my back.
Then immediately, he pushed me against the railings and kept his one leg between my thighs, and his hands at my sides while he gave me a suspicious look.
“Do you think your bluff is going to work on me? I’ve played these games before. I’m not going to fall for your tricks. So cough up the truth.”
I gulped. How did he even figure out anything? I gave no sort of hints.
“Bluff? Why would I be lying to you? There’s really nothing wrong with me. I’m fine as day. You are the one who’s having some sort of a misunderstanding or something.”
“Misunderstanding?”
“Yeah. I may look stressed because of my studies. But, it’s nothing serious. Believe me.”
“And how can you guarantee me that you aren’t lying?” he asked. “You are always lying to me whenever you can. And you are mad at me, so this might be the perfect opportunity for you to lie to me and I can’t do anything about it also. Is that what you are thinking?”
“You are being absurd here. I’m not always lying to you. I only do it when there is a strong reason behind it,” I replied.
“And that strong reason is always so offending to me. I don’t understand why I’m always the victim. Do you hate me or something?”
Is this the only outcome he comes up with after asking me so many questions?
“I”
“Just because I tend to believe your every word, you seem to be getting away with lying to me all the time. Which clearly isn’t right, don’t you think?”
The guilt I felt having to lie to him against my will was far more tough than I thought it would be.
But, if I just blatantly tell him the truth, he’s going to think I may have any feelings for Marshall. And yet, lying to him would also make the situation worse.
I’m screwed either way so it’s better to explain the situation when both of us are super cool about this.
This isn’t the right time. I don’t consider Marshall my enemy. He’ll always be an ally to me. So, I can’t get him into trouble.
I caressed his face and replied, “If you believe everything I say is the truth. Then, believe my words. There’s really nothing wrong with me right now. But, if you don’t believe me. I really can’t do anything to make you believe me. Now, it’s up to you to decide. Not me.”
“I think You do realize despite how cold I act towards you, I can’t seem to treat you coldly for real. That’s because you’ve become my weakness and the weapon that can bleed me dry even without lifting a finger. Now, it’s up to you what you want to be. But, no matter how you want to turn out to be, I’ll accept you with my whole heart. Cause that’ll be my price for loving you.”