“Like I said, I’ve worked for this family since I was a boy, my father watched Noah’s mother go through the same thing Embry, whatever promises he makes that he won’t hurt you anymore are lies. I can’t force you to let me help you so whenever you realise what you need to do, you can come to me” he grabbed my hand, reassuringly squeezing it before walking out the door.
Closing the door, I leaned my head against it, the tears flooding my vision. My shoulders shook with the weight of my grief as I tried to silence the noise of my sobs. He knew who I was. He knew me. I could have walked out that door with him, but what right did I have to put another life in danger. I slid down to the floor, allowing my body to curl up in misery. A raw sense of agony convulsed within my body, agony over this endless situation, over Indigo having actually cared about me, over the impact everything Noah said had on me.
Jonathan had made a remark about not believing Noah’s promises that he would no longer hurt me. But how often had he actually made that promise, how often can I say that I’m staying because he promised he would change his ways. The truth is not that often.
By God I wish it had been more often, I wish it was a regular occurrence so then maybe I wouldn’t have to shoulder this burden and I could push it off under that reasoning. The only thing occupying my thoughts was how confident he was about helping me. How sure he sounded that he could do this safely, even after I told him his daughters could lose their father he never dropped the offer.
Maybe it could- no. I can’t trick myself into a sense of false hope again. Right? Maybe I just need a reason. If I could just give myself a reason, one that triumphs over all the other things keeping me here.
Then maybe I could leave, couldn’t I?
Noah’s POV
I ran my hands down my face at the load of work waiting for my attention. I should be outside lying beside my wife right now, but I suppose if I want to buy my little bug everything she could possibly wish for in life then work is a priority at the moment. Just until I have enough saved for us to cut off all ties to those people I call family.
My attention was redirected to the soft knock on the door, a warm feeling encasing me at the thought of my flower coming to see me. “Come in my love” I called out, a grin settling on my face as she gently stepped into the room. I motioned for her to come over to me, but scrunched my eyes in confusion as she sat down in the chair opposite me.
“Is everything okay little bug? You look upset” I questioned, leaning closer to the desk, examining her worn out expression. “Can we talk?” she gently mumbled, anxiously playing with her fingers. “Of course Ems, we can talk about anything, is everything okay?” My voice took a more serious tone, concern filling me at this stage. I noted the way her eyes shot up as I called her Ems. I suppose it had been a long time since I’ve called her that but I wanted to show her I was serious about whatever it is that is troubling her. I was going to make this fresh start work.
“It’s about last night” I could tell she was hesitant, studying my reaction so I simply gave her an encouraging nod to continue. “You said you don’t want to lose me and I can, I can tell that by everything that’s happened between us that you mean it” her eyes shyly met mine. “With my whole heart” I smiled knowing that no amount of words would ever show her just how much I didn’t want to lose her. How much I refused to ever lose her.
“Do you still want a fresh start?” Nodding, I tried to figure out exactly where my little bug was going with this conversation. A soft sigh left her lips, “I need to hear you say it Noah.” “I still want a fresh start Embry” I reached over the table taking her hand in mine to show the sincerity of that sentence. “Do you remember our wedding day, and you said you wouldn’t make a pinky promise you can’t keep” at this she pulled her hands away from mine, once again anxiously fidgeting with them. “I do,” “I know everything that happened last night and stuff but if you really want me to be a part of this fresh start then I need you to pinky promise me something Noah.”
“Of course, anything” I leaned closer towards her again, curious to hear what had made her so worked up. “Noah I need you to understand how serious I am about this okay though, I can’t just let this be another one of my things that I go back on my word about” her face contorted with a pained expression.
“I need you to promise me that you won’t ever physically lay a hand on me again and that you won’t ever intentionally hurt me again” she held her shaking hand out towards me, her pinky awaiting mine. I internally awed at her cute little display of bravery. “I know you know how much they mean to me so if you genuinely can’t make this promise then I will just walk out of here now and we can save ourselves the trouble” her tone was sharp. If I was being honest seeing her this assertive was a bit of a turn on.
Reaching toward her hand, I linked my pinky with hers. “I pinky promise Embry” with a nod from her we both kissed our thumbs. I watched her shoulders drop in relief as she quickly wiped off the tear residue from her cheeks. I couldn’t wrap my head around why this was all so important to her now.
But I was soon to find out.