“I love you. I’ll be back,” I said. I turned to Mary Beth and she was crying too, and still shaking. I went to her and held her and kissed her. “Hey,” I said. “This is just cop stuff. This is what I do. I’m coming back to you. I love you.”
Then I turned and walked out the door.
———-
Carlos Santos did business in a dingy warehouse near Burbank Airport. They made me strip to my underwear to make sure I had no weapons and wasn’t wired, then they let me in.
“You’ve got some balls, I’ll give you that,” Carlos said. “Why are you here, cop?”
“Dawn,” I said.
Carlos walked a circle around me as he talked. “What the fuck, ‘dawn’ what?” he said. “Something happening at dawn?” Both of his lieutenants, sitting in chairs on opposite sides of the room, laughed in order to signify that the boss had said something funny.
I said, “You killed my brother. I know what he was and I understand why you did it. He didn’t tell the Feds anything and he never would have, but I understand why you did it. But Dawn… she hasn’t seen anything and she hasn’t heard anything and she hasn’t done anything to you. Let it go.”
Carlos laughed and said, “A good uncle. It’s good to see that the importance of family has not been lost on your generation. I appreciate that. But also… I hate loose ends, you know?”
He stopped circling and stared at me. “Your brother. He screamed like a puta. You know this word, yes? And then he cried like a little girl.” I stared back at him.
The lieutenant on my left laughed. “Yeah, man, he thought he had a chance of making it out of there alive right up until you took a sledge hammer to his knee. After that it was all downhill for him.”
Carlos closed his eyes and clenched his fists. “All right vato, that’s enough. Time to figure out how to best use our new friend here to get what we need.” He opened his eyes and looked at me. “You know where she is and how to get around any security that you’ve given her, yes?”
“Fuck you,” I said. When he hit me I saw stars and almost went down. As my vision cleared I saw him rubbing his hand. He was wearing brass knuckles. When had he put those on? I felt blood sliding down off the side of my head and onto my t-shirt.
“Fuck me? No, I think it is you who are fucked here, cop.”
I felt a dreadful calm descend onto me. I knew everything I needed to know. These were the men who killed my brother, and these were also men who would never stop trying to kill Dawn.
I reached up to hold my head and lowered myself, bending at the knees, as though I were fighting to stay upright. The lieutenants laughed and Carlos came in closer, probably to deliver another blow. He had no chance. I summoned all the strength I had and kicked Carlos in the throat, shattering his larynx. He went down like a sack of flour, clutching his neck.
I put him out of the equation and focused on the lieutenants, wondering which would draw first. The guy on my left made a move for his shoulder holster and I was on him, intending to use him as a bullet absorbing shield. As I watched, the other guy pulled out a knife. That changed things. I broke my guy’s neck and wiggled his head around to make sure, then grabbed his coat and wrapped it around my left hand and squared off with the other guy.
I hate knives. Absolutely hate them. But I also understand them and how to use them. This guy was good with a knife. He didn’t flip it between hands or sweep it back and forth sideways like on TV. He held it poised, ready for defense and ready for a perfect offensive opening. I knew that stance.
“Rangers,” I said.
“Delta, actually,” he said. “Rangers are pussies. Wanna prove it?”
He moved on me and just as I realized that the coat on my hand was actually a liability, slowing my arm and throwing off my weight distribution, he struck. I reacted. We moved away from each other. I had a brand new eighth inch deep gash running across my abdomen. I tossed the coat aside.
“Told you, Bro,” he said. “Ain’t no Ranger can take me,” and he moved on me again.
“I’m not just a Ranger,” I said. He lunged and I sidestepped it and hit him in the head. He whirled around and swung the knife towards my throat and I fell under it and captured his arm and bent it and the knife went into his chest. He sank to the ground and stared at me.
“Fuck you, Ranger,” he said, spitting up blood.
“Not just a Ranger,” I said. “Little extra training on the side.” I twisted the knife until I was sure it had sliced into his heart, wiped the handle clean, and I left him to bleed out. I walked over to Carlos, who was beginning to turn purple. He stared up at me.
“Sucks, doesn’t it?” I said. “Not being able to breathe. It’s amazing the little things we take for granted.”
I sat with him until he stopped struggling and his eyes glazed over. I felt for a pulse and there was none.
I looked at my wound. Seeping blood; not too bad. The black shirt should hide it well enough.
I put on my clothes and went home.
———-
My head hurt and my vision was a little fuzzy. I considered pulling over and resting, but I needed to make it home to be with my women.
As I drove I thought about how I should be feeling a catharsis of some sort. I had just killed the men who murdered my brother and who were after my lover. I was no stranger to killing and they deserved to die so I felt no remorse.
The problem was that all my prior killing had been for my country, and justified by that. This was murder, plain and simple. More than that, I was a cop, a detective. It was my job to prevent murder if I could and to track down and punish those who committed it. It was a conflict I wasn’t sure I could resolve.
I pulled onto my street, hit the button for the garage door, and parked the car. By the time I got out of the car, Dawn, Mary Beth, Jen, and Buddy were out of the house to greet me. Dawn got to me first and hugged me so tightly that I couldn’t breathe.
Standing up had been a mistake. My vision blurred and I fought to stay upright. Dawn backed away and said, “Johnny?”
Then Mary Beth screamed and the last thing I saw before everything went black was Dawn’s white blouse, covered in my blood.