Alethea
I know right away that bringing it up is a mistake.
Asher knows what the Blue Moon means for me as an Alpha female-I will go into heat.
And because I am unmarked, every unmated male around will sense it. They will want me. They will crave me. The thought alone makes my skin crawl.
Before I can finish my sentence, Asher stiffens. His entire body goes rigid, and then, without a word, he shifts slightly away from me.
But even as he puts distance between us, his grip on Declan remains protective as if shielding our son from an invisible threat.
A lump forms in my throat. “I’m sorry,” I say in a rush, my voice barely above a whisper. “This was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Panic rises in me. I stretch out my arms, desperate to take Declan from him, but Asher stops me with a firm look.
“What’s wrong with you?” he demands, with frustration evident in his voice. “I haven’t even given you an answer, and you’re already shutting down like this.”
“Please, Asher,” I plead, closing my eyes for a second, trying to push back the emotions that threaten to swirl in me. “I knew this was the wrong move. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“And have I said anything yet?” he snaps, with a sharp voice that is barely restrained.
I open my eyes and glance at Declan, sleeping peacefully in his arms. His tiny face is so serene, unaware of the tension between us.
“I don’t need to hear what you have to say,” I whisper, careful not to wake our son. “Your emotions say it all.”
Suddenly, Asher gets up, Declan still in his arms. Without a word, he turns and walks away.
My heart clenches painfully in my chest as I watch him go, his figure growing smaller with each step. I don’t understand. One moment, I thought everything was finally falling into place-the happiness I had envisioned, the life I had dreamed of-and then, in an instant, it slipped through my fingers.
Am I doomed never to find the happiness I crave?
I don’t know how long I stand there, staring at his retreating form. It’s only when he disappears completely from view that I feel the wetness on my lips-the salty taste of my own tears.
Shit. I’ve been crying.
I roughly wipe my face, and my fingers tremble as I smooth out my rumpled clothes. Without another thought, I turn and head toward the pack house, I need the solitude of my room.
Once inside, I start pacing, as my mind spins with thoughts I can’t control. What just happened? What changed so suddenly between us? Is there something Asher isn’t telling me?
I thought we had bared our hearts to each other, stripped away the walls that kept us apart and started fresh. But I guess I was wrong.
The more I think, the heavier the weight in my chest becomes. My legs grow weak, and I finally sink onto the bed in exhaustion.
I don’t have much time left. The Blue Moon is coming, and Asher isn’t ready to commit.
A low growl rumbles in my throat. I clutch my chest, my body trembling as the sobs finally break free.
Why does it always end like this?
“Let’s go for a run,” Xena suggests. She has been quiet the whole time, which isn’t unusual, sometimes, she only makes her presence known when she feels like it.
“That’s because you’re worried over something irrelevant,” Xena says, settling down.
I nearly growl in frustration. “How dare you say it’s irrelevant?” The urge to yank her tail flickers through my mind, but I shake it off.
“You know what? Never mind. Let’s go for a run.”
“No, Xena. I’m not going anywhere.” My voice is firm. “I’d rather stay in bed all day and night than run with you.”
She huffs. “Fine, Ally. Your choice.”
I pull the covers over me and snuggle deeper into the bed, willing myself to sleep.
—
The past few days have been hard. I’ve been avoiding Asher in every way possible, though he keeps trying to reach me. Deep down, I know I can’t keep running forever. I need answers.
I have to see the witch.
If something is wrong with me, she might be able to confirm it-and if she has a potion to help, even better. But I have to be discreet. I can’t risk Asher finding out, not yet.
Declan, on the other hand, has been with Selena most of the time. He seems to be bonding well with Asher, which only makes my chest tighten with emotions I can’t even begin to unravel.
Now, as I finish packing a small bag, preparing to slip away from the pack and land unnoticed, I suddenly feel a presence. My entire body stiffens.
The scent.
It’s all-consuming, stirring up emotions I’ve desperately tried to bury. My eyes flutter shut as I clench my fists, fighting the overwhelming urge to give in to the feelings rushing through me.
“You’ve been avoiding me, Ally. What’s wrong?” Asher asks, his voice calm-too calm.
Why is he so composed? Doesn’t he see how much he’s hurt me?
I want to scream at him, to demand why he’s acting like nothing has changed. But I bite the inside of my cheek and swallow my frustration. My gaze lifts to his, and I take in the way he looks, infuriatingly good-looking, as always.
Goddess, I’ve missed him.
But it’s obvious now that it’s one-sided. He doesn’t see how cold he’s been. Why did I ever think I could change him?
“I don’t know,” I finally say, my voice even. “I guess we’ve both been busy.”
It’s a lie. The truth is, I stopped working for him on purpose. I didn’t want to be near him anymore, so I discreetly switched to helping at the daycare instead-just like I’d suggested to Kayla.
Asher studies me carefully, his eyes searching for something beneath the surface. “Okay, if you say so,” he finally says. “I have a meeting with the pack elders, and I want you there.”
I shake my head slowly. “I’m sorry, Asher. I won’t be there.”
His green eyes lock onto mine, holding me captive. I want to look away, to break the spell, but I can’t.
“Okay,” he murmurs after a moment. Then, without another word, he leans in and presses a soft kiss to my forehead before striding off, leaving me standing there, with my aching heart.
I wanted to scream at him, to grab him, run my fingers through his hair, and pull him into a kiss. But I couldn’t. I had to stay calm.
The pain in my chest was unbearable as I watched him walk away.
With quick, determined steps, I rushed out of the packhouse, I’m grateful that none of the guards stopped me. I had earned their trust long ago, and they never questioned my movements.
Once outside, I moved swiftly as I kept my head down to avoid drawing any attention. I couldn’t risk anyone seeing me, not now.
After what felt like an eternity, I finally reached my destination-a small, weathered hut hidden deep within the woods.
I sigh in relief with shaky breath. This was the place Kayla had told me about when I discreetly asked for help. I just hoped she hadn’t suspected anything.
Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward and lifted my hand to knock-
But before I could, the door swung open.
My heart nearly leaped out of my chest as I froze, my breath catching in my throat at the sight before me.