Hailey
The night wrapped its cold fingers around me as I stood on the balcony-arms wrapped around myself-trying to soothe wounds that no one could see but only feel. Wounds he had carved into me with his touch. Wounds I knew would never heal.
I had no right to feel heartbroken.
I kept repeating that to myself like a fucking prayer-like it would somehow numb the ache clawing inside my chest.
What was I to Damien, anyway?
A warm body in his bed. A mouth to kiss. A cunt to fuck.
Nothing more.
This had been nothing but a mind-blowing sexual adventure for him-something to pass the time. And somewhere along the way, I had been stupid enough to start searching for something else.
Something more.
It was my fault.
All of this…
It was all my fault.
Another tear slid down my cheek before I could stop it. With a frustrated groan, I wiped it away, hating how weak I was. Hating how easily he had broken me.
I had promised myself-sworn to myself-that I wouldn’t cry over that asshole again.
But the tears kept falling.
They wouldn’t fucking stop.
I rubbed my arms against the cold night air, staring up at the moonlit sky as if it could give me answers. As if it could tell me how to rip him out of my system-how to forget every time he touched me like I was the only thing in the world that mattered.
I didn’t even hear him coming.
I only felt it-
The warmth of him. The slow, sinful slide of his hand around my waist. His scent wrapped around me-smoke, leather, and sin-the same scent that clung to my sheets, to my skin, to every fucking part of me. His breath fanned against my neck, inching closer, like he was about to bury his face into me the way he always did-like he could own me all over again.
But not this time.
Before he could touch me-before he could sink his teeth into the cracks he’d already made-I spun around and shoved him back with both hands.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
My voice shook-filled with rage and pain and a thousand things I knew he’d never care enough to see.
His body barely budged, but his jaw clenched, the muscle there twitching as if my touch had burned him. Wrapped in all black-just like the fucking darkness he had tainted my soul with-he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed like I was nothing more than a nuisance.
“Hailey, I really don’t have the mood to talk about what happened at the breakfast table right now.”
So casually cruel.
Like we were discussing the weather.
Not the fact that he’d just shattered me into fucking pieces.
My breath caught, and the bitterest laugh slipped past my lips before I could stop it.
“Skip that part for now?” I sneered, arms wrapping tighter around myself. “And what-jump into bed with you like your little whore again?” He flinched. Just the slightest bit.
But I saw it.
Good.
“No, Damien.” My voice broke against the knot lodged in my throat. “I am not some heartless bitch who can fuck you knowing you’re cheating on your fiancee.”
His jaw locked-so hard I thought his teeth might crack. His fists curled at his sides, flexing and releasing like he was trying to wrestle back whatever fury was boiling beneath his skin.
“Fine.” His voice was low, lethal. “You want to talk about it? Let’s fucking talk about it.” He crossed his arms over his chest, grey eyes cutting through me like they could peel me apart without ever laying a finger on me. I swallowed thickly, rage bubbling up from the very place he’d scorched inside me.
“The audacity you have-” I took a step forward, my heart splintering with every word- “to show up here and act so fucking casual-like this is nothing to you-like you’re not breaking me into fucking dust-” My voice cracked. The tears welled up again.
No.
Not now.
Not in front of him.
“Well, what the hell did you expect, Hailey? What are we, exactly? Can you put a label on this?” His voice was raw, each word a shard of glass. “If you can, then go ahead and do it. I will call off the engagement. I’ll walk out that door, no questions asked.”
He took a step forward, and instinctively, I took a step back, my spine pressed against the cold, unyielding railing of the balcony. My breath quickened, and I could feel my pulse thrumming in my ears as tears pricked at the corners of my eyes. The cruel indifference in his voice sliced through me like a knife, each word crawling into the cracks of my heart and digging deeper. I blinked hard, willing my tears back, but the first few traitorous tears slid down my cheeks anyway. And the worst fucking part? He noticed. His fingers lifted before I could stop him, brushing those tears away with the pad of his thumb like they were some kind of weakness that needed to be erased. The evidence of his barbarism.
“This isn’t a fucking love story, Hailey.” His voice softened-so soft it almost made me believe he cared. But the sternness underneath sliced me right down the middle, “It was never meant to be.”
A bitter laugh escaped my lips, but I didn’t know why I didn’t push him away. Why didn’t I fight back? “I wonder, Damien,” I whispered, my voice cracking. “What the hell are you made of? You don’t have a heart, do you?” I tilted my head, staring at him like I could see straight through to the hollow space where his heart should’ve been.
“You really don’t have a heart, do you?”
For a second-just a flicker-those cold, dead eyes of his softened. But it was gone before I could catch it.
His thumb dragged down my cheek-so painfully gentle it made me want to scream.
“Hearts are for people who want to be saved, Bunny.” His breath fanned against my lips. “You should’ve known by now… I don’t want to be fucking saved.”
My chest caved, breath hitching on a silent sob.
He leaned in-so close our lips almost touched-like he was about to kiss me. Like he was about to ruin me all over again.
And I hated myself-
God, I fucking hated myself-
Because I almost let him untill he spoke up….
“So to answer your question… yes, I fucking don’t, Hailey,” he spat, his voice sharp, venomous. “And I guess you knew that all too well, didn’t you? I told you from the very start, didn’t I? It’s never all flowers and candles with me. Don’t act like you didn’t know it. You knew everything. Every damn thing. Every sick detail. So what’s your point now? That I’m wrong for moving on with my life?”
God, I would’ve rather he plunged a knife into my chest than hear these words.
He leaned in closer, his breath cold against my skin. “What the hell am I supposed to do with you, Hailey? Sneak around the house, hiding from Madison and Dad? Is that why you thought I planned my whole life out for you? You couldn’t have been that naive. Nobody could be. This…”
He jabbed his finger at his chest, then pressed it to mine, the touch colder than ice. His finger felt like a blade cutting through the air between us.
“This was nothing. Nothing special. This was an affair-just a twisted, sick affair. Just two broken people who enjoyed the wreckage we made of each other. Don’t you dare try to blame me. You were just as fucking involved. And you know what? If you’d been in my position, you’d have done the exact same thing.”
I wanted to scream. I wanted to slap him, shove him away-but I couldn’t move.
I couldn’t look at him.
But his eyes… his cruel, empty grey eyes… they were mocking me. Laughing at me.
A sob choked in my throat. “Then why the fuck did you make it feel special?” My voice broke. I pushed him hard, sending him stumbling back. “Why the fuck did you make it seem like you actually cared?”
I pushed again. “Why the hell did you hold me in your arms like you were going to protect me?” Another shove. “Why did you wipe my fucking tears away when you should have just pushed me away and called me clingy?”
Another push. I was pushing him into my room now. My anger burned, but it was nothing compared to the hollow ache in my chest. We were so close now. Eyes locked, my soul screaming at him that he’d destroyed me. And his eyes? Empty, cold-nothing.
“Why the fuck did you let me feel safe in your arms,” I whispered, barely able to breathe, “when all you were ever going to do was break me apart?”
His back hit the wall. Finally, he grabbed my wrists.
I could barely get the words out, but I had to-had to make him understand. “I know I have no right to blame you, Damien, but… you fucking broke me.” I couldn’t stop the tears now. “It hurts so fucking much, and I wish it didn’t. I wish I could be as cold as you, but I can’t. It’s my fault. I’ve got a fucking heart, and I tried to find one in you, too… but I should’ve listened to everyone else. You don’t have a fucking heart. You’re just empty. Empty and hollow. A fucking void.”
His grip on my wrists tightened, but he didn’t say a word. He just stared at me-like I wasn’t even a person.
“I gave you everything,” I choked out, my voice shaking with rage and sadness. “I slept with a man who had no fucking regard for anyone but himself. It was my fault. I caught feelings-my fault. I expected more-my fault. I wanted to see something good in you-my fault. I was naive, dumb… easy.”
I spat the last words, feeling the bitterness burn my throat. “But don’t kid yourself, Damien. You were fucking someone else the whole damn time. Forget my heart. I can handle that. But that poor woman? Don’t leave her broken. Because, you know, if you do-there’ll be less blood on your hands. Maybe, just maybe, that’ll make you a little less of a fucking monster.”
I ripped my wrists out of his grip and stepped back, my chest heaving with emotion. “Get out. Just… get out before I hate you more than I already do.”
He didn’t move. He didn’t leave. Instead, he took a step closer, like he was daring me to do something, anything.
His hand rose slowly, and before I knew what was happening, his fingers were under my chin, tilting my face up to meet his cold gaze. His expression was blank, like he wasn’t even human.
Then the words I dreaded, the words I couldn’t have prepared for, slid past his lips. “You were a good fuck, Hailey,” he said, a cruel smirk curling at his lips. “That’s all you ever were to me. But hey, this doesn’t have to end. My marriage? Doesn’t change a damn thing. I’ll still think about how good you were in bed. Maybe, if you can get your emotions under control and decide you want more of this, you can come to me. After all, I’m just a few doors away.”
And then-like a fucking snap-the last remnants of whatever I had left inside me shattered.
I couldn’t hold it in anymore.
Before I even realized what I was doing, I raised my hand, and slapped him across the face with everything I had.