Epilogue
Aria Ruso
When I told Cade that I wanted a home birth with only the two of us, he had two conditions. We had a doctor on standby in another room, and we had a guard posted outside the door at all times.
Neither were difficult to accommodate, and I decided that I preferred it that way. Carter had been outside the door for the past six hours, and I knew, after hours of exhausting pushing, that it was time. The pressure had grown almost unbearable, and I could no longer stand without Cade’s strong arms holding me upright.
My entire body was coated in a thin layer of sweat as I groaned through each contraction and waited for Carter to fill the tub with warm water. When it had finally been filled, he offered a hand to help me inside, and I nearly collapsed at the tinge of relief the warmth gave my muscles. It was almost as if sitting in the tub was all I needed to finish this.
“What can I do? Carter asked, looking between Cade and me with a pale expression. I knew that the small amount of blood leaking from my spread legs had done it. I knew exactly what was about to happen next as he stumbled slightly to the side. I’d seen it many times in my time as a nurse, but as another contraction hit, I didn’t have the voice to tell Cade to catch Carter as he fell to the floor, entirely unconscious.
If it had been another time, I might have laughed. But instead, I bared my teeth and pushed.
It felt right to have Elizabeth dropping by with fresh towels every half hour, and it felt just as right to have Carter here for the birth. They were like the siblings I never had. They were family, and I wouldn’t have wanted anyone else in the room supporting both me and Cade.
The pain ate at every one of my thoughts and emotions as I held a hand between my legs and pushed, feeling a sliver of the head between my thighs. Contractions no longer mattered. My body was removing this baby with or without my consent, and I leaned forward, bracing myself on the sides of the tub as I pushed again and again. Only Cade’s comforting words kept me grounded, and the way he brushed the hair from the back of my neck reminded me of life outside of this pain.
I pushed, feeling an intense burning that had a scream working from my throat.
I pushed, and in an instant, the intense, blinding pain fell away as a child slid from my body and left me panting. I grabbed it, pulling it from the water and bringing it to my chest, rubbing its back hard until, in a burst of sound, the baby began screaming.
Wailing.
I could hardly pay attention as Cade brought a suction bulb into the baby’s nose and mouth, sucking out the remaining fluid from the child’s lungs. I moved a hand between its legs, feeling there and releasing a cry.
“It’s a boy,” I said, love filling my chest.
I couldn’t believe how quickly the pain was gone. Everything around me faded as the small wailing boy screamed in my arms, and Cade wrapped his arms around both of us, taking in the moment the same.
Everything felt completely and immensely right.
It shocked me when Cade moved from behind me and climbed into the tub alongside me, seemingly unfazed by the blood and fluids surrounding him. He sank into it and sat in front of me, bringing both the baby and me into his arms. I looked into his eyes and found a single, wayward tear there.
It fell down his cheek as he looked between us with a hard expression. Somehow, I could read the unspoken words there. I could feel them as he held us.
I love you.
“I did it,” I whispered, trembling from the exertion. The baby released a small coo amid the crying and seemed to burrow deeper into my arms as he heard my voice.
He nodded, and behind him, I watched as Carter rose, rubbing his head as he looked between us. After all, we’d gone through together, and this intimate moment felt okay to share with him. And when he smiled at us, I knew that he felt the same way.
At some point, Elizabeth came into the room with more towels, and she left them on the couch. She stopped just long enough to leave a lingering kiss on my forehead, the baby’s head, and her brother’s forehead. We went through the motions of removing the placenta and cutting the cord, but all of it felt like a blur as Cade continued holding me.
“Marry me,” Cade whispered, looking intently into my eyes.
“We already are,” I said with a chuckle.
Out of nowhere, he pulled a small velvet box and opened it, showing me the contents. “I’m not putting it on your finger right now, but after all of this, you’re going to marry me for real. Not an arrangement or a fake marriage. You’re mine, and I’m never letting you go. Marry me,” he demanded.
Despite the demanding tone that I’d come to expect from him, I saw the vulnerability there. I knew that if I told him no, he’d respect that answer and move on.
But I would never tell him no.
As he helped me out of the tub and dried my limbs as I held our baby to my chest, bundled beneath a dry towel, I thought about the best way to respond. He walked me to the couch and allowed me to get comfortable as he dropped to his soaking knees before me, and I finally knew what to say.
“It’s been real for me for a lot longer than this,” I told him, nodding.
“Yes, I’ll marry you for real.”
He buried his head into the crook of my arm, and the baby cooed, snuggling his head into his father’s. It felt unusual being taken care of in this way when I’d always been the one doing the caretaking, but it also felt right.
I knew without a doubt that I belonged with this sweet, terrifying, and protective man, and I knew that he felt the same way.
THE END