Aria’s POV.
For a little while, I forgot about everything else-about Zander, about the gathering, and about the heavy weight of the past that always seemed to follow me.
Sitting across from Ethan, I felt surprisingly comfortable. He was easy to talk to, and his relaxed, friendly vibe made it simple to just enjoy the moment.
For the first time in a long while, I wasn’t overthinking every word or second-guessing myself. I found myself laughing at his jokes, asking him questions, and genuinely enjoying the time we were spending together.
But as the night went on, a familiar ache started to creep back in, slowly but surely. It was subtle at first, like a small voice in the back of my mind, but it grew louder the longer we talked.
Ethan really was great. He was kind, funny, and sweet in a way that felt so genuine. He had this way of making me feel seen and appreciated, and I wanted so badly to feel the same way about him. But there was no spark. There was no pull, no deeper connection that made my heart skip a beat.
It wasn’t anything he did wrong-it wasn’t his fault at all. It was mine.
I couldn’t stop myself from comparing every little thing to how I’d felt with Zander. Even at our worst, even in the moments where we clashed or argued, there had been something electric between us. It was a spark I couldn’t ignore, something that felt raw and undeniable.
Sitting there with Ethan, I realized he didn’t make me feel that way. He didn’t light up my soul the way Zander had. And as much as I hated to admit it, I was still thinking about my ex-still holding on to pieces of him-even while I was sitting across from someone as wonderful as Ethan.
“Are you okay?” Ethan’s voice broke through my thoughts, and I realized I’d been quiet for too long. He was looking at me with concern, his warm hazel eyes searching mine.
I forced a smile, trying to push away the storm of emotions inside me. “Yeah,” I said quickly. “Sorry about that. I zoned out for a second.”
“No worries,” he said with a small laugh, his smile still soft and warm. “If I’m boring you, just let me know. I can step up my game.”
“You’re not boring,” I said immediately, shaking my head. “I promise.”
He gave me a look like he didn’t completely believe me, but he didn’t press the issue. Instead, he smoothly steered the conversation back to lighter, more comfortable topics.
After dinner, Ethan walked me to my car. The streets were quiet, and the glow of the streetlights made the shadows on the pavement stretch long and thin.
“I had a really great time tonight,” Ethan said, his hands shoved into his pockets as he looked at me. There was something honest and sincere in the way he spoke, and I could tell he meant it. “Naomi wasn’t lying-you’re pretty amazing.”
His words made me feel a pang of guilt deep in my chest. He was such a good guy, and he deserved someone who could give him the same energy and feelings he was putting into this.
He deserved someone who wasn’t still haunted by a past she couldn’t seem to let go of.
“I had a great time too,” I said honestly. And I really meant it, even if my heart wasn’t fully in it the way it should have been. “Thank you for tonight.”
Ethan hesitated for a moment, like he was working up the courage to say something. Finally, he smiled again, his voice hopeful but not pushy. “Do you think we could do this again sometime?”
I paused, unsure of how to respond. He was wonderful, but I didn’t want to lead him on or give him false hope. “Maybe,” I said finally, offering him a small smile. “I’m… figuring some things out right now.”
He nodded, his expression understanding. “Fair enough. No pressure at all. But if you ever feel like grabbing coffee or just hanging out, let me know.”
“I will,” I said softly, appreciating how kind he was being.
Ethan smiled one last time, and then he turned and walked away. I stayed there for a moment, watching him go, a strange mix of emotions swirling in my chest-guilt, sadness, and confusion all wrapped up together.
Ethan was everything I should want in a person-kind, funny, thoughtful, and easy to talk to. But he wasn’t what I needed. Not right now. Not yet.
—
When I got back to my room, Naomi was waiting for me, just like I knew she would be. She was sitting cross-legged on my bed with a tub of ice cream in her hands, looking totally comfortable, like she’d been camped out there for hours. Her eyes lit up the second I walked into the room, and she pointed her spoon at me like it was some kind of weapon.
“Spill,” she said, grinning. “How was Ethan? Tell me everything.”
“He was great,” I admitted as I kicked off my shoes and tossed my bag onto the floor.
Naomi narrowed her eyes at me suspiciously, her grin fading slightly. “But?” she asked, already sensing there was more to the story.
I sighed, flopping down onto the bed beside her. “But I don’t think I’m ready,” I said, staring up at the ceiling.
Her expression softened immediately, and she put the ice cream down on the nightstand. “That’s okay, you know,” she said gently. “You don’t have to rush into anything. This was supposed to be fun, not some life-changing decision or anything.”
“I know,” I said quietly, my voice barely above a whisper. “It’s just… I don’t know if I’ll ever feel that spark again. Not like before.”
Naomi didn’t say anything at first. Instead, she leaned over and pulled me into a tight hug, her arms wrapping around me like a safety net. “You will, Aria,” she said firmly. “It just takes time. And until then, I’ll be here to set you up on as many blind dates as it takes.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, hugging her back. “You’re relentless, you know that?”
“Someone has to be,” she said, pulling away with a grin.
For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt a tiny glimmer of hope. Maybe-not today, not tomorrow, but someday-I’d be okay again.