Luciano
I had only been truly afraid twice in my entire life. The first time was when I watched men murder my parents. I was just a boy. Barely five, kicking around the covers my Madre had carefully arranged. I hadn’t wanted to go to bed that night. There was this new train track toy padre had gotten and I was so damn antsy to play with it. My mother had forcefully yanked me away from it, scrubbed my face red in the bath despite my whining, yanked a onesie down my head and gave me a sweet kiss right after tucking me in.
I had yelled that I didn’t want her kisses, I just wanted my train track. And she laughed. So beautifully, turned her head to the side to look at me and told me I was much like my padre. Too damned obsessed with everything.
She wasn’t wrong.
She was never wrong.
I should have stayed in bed that night. But I was glad I didn’t. I was glad that I had snuck out of my room, tiny feet carrying me down the hallway and freezing in their steps when my eyes took in the sight I saw before me.
The door to my parents room was left wide open. To think that I had been afraid that Madre was awake and would tan my hide. I’d almost run back to the room until a loud bang resounded.
I hadn’t thought twice. I ran into my parents room. Two men dressed in black stood with my father on the floor, a bullet hole in his head. My mother knelt beside him, crying silently, running her palms together. When she looked up and saw me behind them, Mother went crazy.
“Andare!” She screamed, launching to her feet. “Ucire! Luciano Andare!”
Go. She told me to get out. And while she did, she drove a fist into one of the men’s faces, grabbed his gun and ran to my front to protect me. Run, mother screamed.
The man who had gotten punched, yanked off his mask, his ugly face twisted in a frown. Years later, I would find out he would become Luigi. The mafia Lord. And I would gut him down for what he did to my mother.
For what he did to my family.
I ran. But as I turned the corner, I saw a little black hole in my mothers head and I watched her crumple to the ground.
Dead.
Just like my father was.
The train tracks were forgotten. I never saw them again. Goosebumps littered my skin. My head felt heavier as I ran through the house, into the night, away from those fuckers. That had been the first fucking time ever, that I was truly afraid. In just one night, I had lost everything I ever knew.
But when the sun came up the next day, I swore it would never happen again.
But it did.
Right fucking now.
My heart thumped wildly, I could hear the beating loud in my ears as I dashed out of the blown up cabin.
Raven.
Fuck! I heard that gun shot. Giorgia heard it too. I wasn’t fucking hallucinating!
“If he killed her,” I spat, feeling my whole body tremble. “I swear I’ll gut his eyes out and make him eat it!”
Fuck, what the hell would I do? That wouldn’t bring Raven back. She couldn’t… I told her to leave! Damned woman was too damn stubborn. If she dies, I would tan her hide.
There was no way she could die on me. I survived the shit with Luca. I survived the madness that this whole shit brought on. She had to survive too.
As I surveyed the forest before me, the sky was still as dark as ever. Anything could have happened there. Anything… A mental image of my Cara, sprawled on the floor with a bullet hole in her head flashed through my mind and my body shivered.
“No!” I bellowed, trembling visibly. My hands shook with one emotion I hadn’t felt in a fucking long time.
Fear.
I could not protect my parents. I had failed to protect her too. I would not, I cannot lose her
“Luciano?” Giorgia called behind me
“She’s in danger,” I replied, sprinting towards the forest. Fuck I could feel it. Something was wrong. My Raven… Raven, Cara, hell! Why the hell didn’t she listen to me? She should have trusted me. I would handle it. I would get whatever fucking revenge she wanted, she just needed to fucking trust me!
“You can’t be serious right now,” Giorgia snapped, running after me. “Are you crazy?!”
“Get the men!” I yelled, without looking back. “Do what I tell you Giorgia. They better get their asses here in minutes.”
“To look for that bitch?” She hissed and I whipped around, grabbing her shoulder.
“If Raven dies,” I whispered harshly, “Everyone fucking will. Sicily will never rest. Hell Sicily? The whole if Italy will feel my fucking wrath!”
A sharp pain hit the side of my face, momentarily stunning me. The hell?
“Did you just fucking slap me?”
“Wake the hell up!” She screamed. “What has this woman done to you? Who the hell is she? You’re abandoning your people again because of her!”
“She’s everything!” I bellowed.
Fuck, I hadn’t planned for this to happen. I hadn’t wanted any of this shit to happen. When she walked into my office, filled with spite and flair and burning fire, I was intrigued, nothing more. But somehow, fuck somehow, she came to be much more.
“The mafia was everything to you!” She hissed. “Now it’s some barbie?”
“I can have both,” I grumbled, stepping away from her. What was the point of arguing? We were wasting time. If she was shot, if and only if, then the faster I got to her, the faster I could save her.
“No you cannot!” Giorgia hissed, folding her arms. “it’s time for you to choose Luciano. Us, your family or your American bimbo who got us into this mess in the first place.
“I don’t have time for this shit,” I hissed, turning around. The forest was damned huge. How on earth would I find her quickly? I listened in, to see if I could hear the sound of any human, but all I got were fucking crickets.
You’re too late. You know that. My mind taunted me. You finally find a woman to live for and you let her slip out of your fingers. Pathetic.
“She’s not dead!” I yelled in reply, breathing heavily as I fought the voice in my head. “She cannot leave me. Raven would not,”
Her name isn’t even Raven. You’re holding on to a figment of your imagination. A creation of your mind..
“No,” She was real. Raven, Athena, my Cara, she was real. She could not leave me. I’d made her swear that she wouldn’t. Not even death could take her away. I would not allow it. I will never allow it!
“You’ve gone mad,” Giorgia muttered behind me.
“Call the men,” I ordered. “That’s an order. If you defy me one more time, Giorgia, I’ll take it as treason and you’ll be treated exactly as that fool in there. Call Enzo. Everyone searches the entire area until Raven is found. No one sleeps, no one fucking eats, until she’s found. Understand?!”
Giorgia remained quiet behind me for a while and when she spoke, her voice sounded a bit off.
“You love her,”
I ignored the sudden jarring of my heart at her words and took a few steps forward when she spoke again.
“I’ll call the men,” she said. “I’ll help you find her. Only if you promise me, that you won’t kill Luca-”
“I won’t. Happy now?” I glanced behind me to see her mouth open in horror.
“You agreed so damned easily because of a woman? Never thought I’d see the fucking day. ”
“The more time we waste, the more danger she is in,” I hissed. “If you’re done with your theatrics, I’ll be off. I expect Enzo to be here in Twenty minutes.”
And with that I took off into the forest.
Please be safe Cara, I begged as I ran. Please be fucking safe. I swear once we get through this, I’m locking you up in a fucking tower!
She would get mad if I told her that. Her eyes would flash in anger and she’d finger hairpin in her hair as if considering stabbing me in the neck. She’d huff and flip her hair when she realizes I was being serious and-
Keep fantasizing, my head taunted. She’s slipping away.
“She’s not,” I grumbled, clenched my jaw and dashed over roots and stones when I heard the second bang and a scream.
I died a little inside at the sound. The world turned hazy around me and my knees fucking weakened.
“Raven!” I bellowed, hearing my voice loud and reverberating in the forest. “I’m coming Cara, I’m coming!”