For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt… light. My period had finally ended, freeing me from the pain, and I had just gotten off the phone with my mother. I still couldn’t believe I’d talked to her after so long. She sounded happy-happier than I’d heard her in years.
It felt strange when she mentioned that she knew I was on an educational trip and that phones weren’t allowed. I had never said such a thing. Judas must’ve decided on my behalf. Again. And then she mentioned that her financial condition had stabilized, that Mikhail was enrolled in some private school, and that her small business was flourishing.
But the kicker was when she said, “Thank you for sending us money, Sera. I don’t know how we would have survived without you.”
I froze when I heard that. I hadn’t sent her any money. My chest felt tight, and my mind raced. Judas. It had to be him. Was he taking care of my family without telling me?
I didn’t know how to feel about it. Was I angry? Was I grateful? A mess of emotions fluttered through me, but my heart, damn it, it fluttered too.
I dried my damp hair in the bathroom, staring at my reflection. There was warmth in my cheeks, a smile that I didn’t even realize had crept onto my face. I shook my head, trying to suppress it.
And then I heard it.
Thump.
I froze, my stomach tightening. Another loud crash echoed through the house. Confused, I swung open the bathroom door and stepped into the bedroom.
Judas.
He was there, in the bedroom, thrashing things. Furniture toppled, clothes spilled out of the closet, and shards of a broken lamp littered the floor. He was like a hurricane ripping through the room.
My heart stuttered in panic. “Judas?” I called out, but he didn’t respond.
He yanked open the wardrobe with such force I thought the hinges would break. My feet carried me to him instinctively, my chest tight with worry. “What’s going on? What happened?”
And then he froze.
He stood there, tall and menacing, his broad shoulders rising and falling with ragged breaths. His hands were clenched around something-no, gripping it like it was the source of his fury.
A cardigan. My cardigan.
I swallowed hard. Something didn’t feel right. “Judas?”
He didn’t turn around. But I saw it. The flex of his muscles beneath his shirt, the tension in his body, the storm brewing just beneath the surface. Like he was struggling.
“What is this?” His voice was low, venomous even, and it sent chills down my spine. Chills I felt when I first time saw him. There were so glacial, I nearly shivered in the hot weather.
I swallowed hard, stepping back instinctively. “I… I don’t understand-”
He slowly turned around and I stopped breath. His eyes were bloodshot and his jaw clenched. The muscle underneath his eyes twitched and there was no warmth in his pale blues I was starting to get accustomed to.
It… terrified me.
“What. Is. This?” He snarled holding up the cardigan like it was evidence of a crime. And strangely, it wasn’t the cardigan, it wasn’t the dishevelled room. It was the look in his eyes. That raw, unfiltered rage mixed with darkness. I swore I could feel it in my bones.
“I don’t know! It’s just a cardigan-” I rattled not knowing what to do. What he was saying, or what he wanted me to say?
“Don’t lie to me!” he roared, slamming the wardrobe door shut with such force that the sound reverberated through the room. I jumped startled and felt my heart arte quickening. “You’ve been playing me, haven’t you? All this fucking time!”
“No! Judas, I swear-”
“Swear?” He laughed without any amusement. “You think I’ll believe your fucking swears now?”
My heart hammered so hard I thought it might break free from my chest. What was he doing? Why was he holding that? Why was he looking at me like that?
My cardigan.
My fucking cardigan.
I stared at him wide-eyed, frozen in place. I didn’t know what to say. What could I say?
I flinched as he threw the cardigan to the ground and stepped toward me, his towering frame making me feel smaller than anything. My knees felt weak, my head spinning as I tried to make sense of it all. What the hell was he talking about? What was going on?
“You knew,” he growled animalistically. “You knew about the fucking bug. You let them in.”
“No!” My voice broke as tears welled in my eyes. “I don’t know anything about it! I swear I don’t!”
But he wasn’t listening. His rage was consuming him, and I was caught in its path. He cursed under his breath and before I knew, he was grabbing the vase on the table and smashed it against the wall, the shards scattering like my scattered thoughts. And I let out a terrified scream.
“I trusted you!” His voice cracked. He paced, running a trembling hand through his hair as if fighting a war within himself. “I let you in, and you fucking betrayed me!”
“Judas, please!” I sobbed, reaching for him, but he shoved my hands away, pacing like a caged animal.
“You’re lying!” he bellowed, slamming his fist into the wall. The plaster cracked under the force, and blood seeped from his knuckles.
My knees buckled as I watched him break. “I didn’t do anything. I don’t even know what’s happening!”
He turned to me, his chest heaving, his eyes burning with an intensity that made me shrink back. And then he grabbed my arm-not harshly, but firmly enough to make me gasp.
“You… don’t lie to me.” His voice was low now, almost a whisper, but it was laced with a dangerous edge. “If I find out you had anything to do with this…” He trailed off, his jaw tightening as if even speaking the words was too much.
“I didn’t,” I whispered, tears streaming down my face.
His grip loosened, and for a moment, I thought he might lash out again. But instead, he punched the wall beside me, the impact shaking the room. Blood dripped from his knuckles, and his chest rose and fell as he tried to regain control.
“Why?” His voice broke, and I felt my heart shatter. “Why would you do this to me?”
“I didn’t!” I screamed, my voice raw and desperate. “I wouldn’t. Not to you. Please, let me explain. Tell me what is happening.”
He stared at me with an unreadable expression. I sank to the floor, clutching my head as my sobs echoed in the empty space between us. I didn’t know what had just happened.
His pale eyes bore into me. Scorchingly fierce and burning as if he wanted to burn me along. I couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. His hand clenched as if he was controlling himself, but we both know he would destroy me.
I was about to open my mouth. But then it happened.
The shrill of the alarm tore through the house. My heart jumped into my heart, and my breath hitched. His head snapped to the side, eyes narrowing in suspicion, his entire body going rigid. Like a wire pulled too tight and ready to snap. The door burst opened and a guard rushed in. his eyes landed on the room, taking in the messy state and then at me. He swallowed before his eyes lifted to meet the devil looming over me.
“Sir…” he panted, trying to catch his breath. “We’re under attack.”