Isabella
I huff, looking at myself in the mirror, and run my fingers over the snow-white voile of my sleeves. Well, I have to admit it’s kinda pretty. If there’s anything in this whole day that satisfies me, it’s my wedding dress.
The hand-sewn flowers on my sleeves look beautiful against my caramel skin, and the dark curls of my hair lie beautifully on my shoulders, adorning a diamond necklace that Raul sent me yesterday. I don’t know if it was a genuine gift or a carefully crafted jest in my direction-as if he expected me not to have any jewelry worthy of wearing-but the necklace was too beautiful for me to reject it, even for the sake of making my future husband mad.
God, Raul Jose de Lugo is my future husband.
I close my eyes for a moment and cover them with my hand, focusing on the wave of disbelief that washes over me. I’ve been planning this for a while, so it shouldn’t affect me so much. It’s just a deal, it’s nothing serious-but the closer I get to the ceremony, the tighter my chest feels.
Is it nervousness? Excitement? Protest? Frustration? I sigh and shake my head, looking at myself in the mirror. Even if it’s a mixture of
everything, it’s not gonna stop me. I am not doing this for myself-I am doing it for my family, and no matter what, I am going to go through with the wedding.
As my thoughts drift away to the ceremony, my ears catch the sound of steps from the hallway and I turn around just as the door opens. It reveals Alina in a baby-blue dress, holding up a bouquet of cream roses and white lilies, and Jacinta in a beige dress with three glasses of champagne in her hands.
“We’ve found the bouquet,” Alina says with a delighted smile, looking around in search of a vase, while Jacinta walks over with a mischievous smirk.
“And something to help you shake off the nerves.” She holds up one of the glasses for me, and even I am surprised at the wave of relief that washes over me as I reach for it. Damn, Jacinta may be five years younger than me, but she knows a lot more than you would expect.
“Well, for a successful deal!” Jacinta raises her glass, and Alina chuckles and looks at me.
“And for a beautiful wedding.”
Ah, I’m not sure if we have to drink for that, but I swallow my bitterness with the first gulp of champagne. What’s there to complain about? This has been my idea from the start, and even if the reality of my decision hit me only today, it doesn’t change anything. Raul will be my husband, and together, we’ll be able to defeat the Escarras once and for all.
“You know, all this fuss around the ceremony reminds me of my own wedding,” Jacinta says a moment later, taking a seat in an armchair
while Alina steps closer to me to take a better look at my face. What, is the makeup okay?
“Yes, I know what you mean.” Alina giggles and meets my gaze for a moment, patting my shoulder. I don’t know what she sees in my eyes, but her smile turns sympathetic before she turns away to Jacinta. “But isn’t it exciting? All these schedules, last-minute preparations, thoughts about the future together… Ah, I have goosebumps just thinking about it!”
Alina looks at me with a bright smile, but I can return only a faint ghost of it. Yes, it must be pretty exciting for them. Every girl dreams of a beautiful wedding, after all. And mine is beautiful, too, but…both Jacinta and Alina got married for love, so for them it was a day of happiness. For me, it’s a day of broken dreams about a future full of love. Instead, I am
going to spend the rest of my life with a powerful but ruthless man who has no feelings for me.
I purse my lips a little and glance at the mirror, straightening up to imagine myself at the altar. Goddamnit. I finish the rest of the glass in one gulp and wince for a moment as the sparkles scratch my throat. Perhaps I should’ve asked Elena to be my bridesmaid. At least she had to go through an arranged marriage herself, even if everything worked out in the end.
God, is there a way to stop thinking about it?
I focus on the conversation between Alina and Jacinta-both of them reminiscing about their weddings and the young days of their love
with Paolo and Giovanni-but it doesn’t really help distract me. Do I need another glass of champagne? I’m actually considering it, leaning on the back of the couch and staring into the distance, when I hear a knock on the door.
“Yes?” I ask while Alina steps to the door only to break into a wide smile upon the sight of her husband and son.
It looks like Benito has just stopped crying-his lips are pouty, his cheeks are pink, and his eyes are glassy when he looks around the room. As soon as his gaze lands on Alina, Benito’s face scrunches into a grimace again and he holds out his arms as Alina immediately reaches to take him.
“He’s getting fussy,” Giovanni says, handing him over to Alina and gently stroking his hair. “I figured he got tired of everyone else and wanted to see you.”
“Oh no, did you miss Mommy? I missed you too,” Alina immediately coos at Benito, patting him on the side before looking up at Giovanni with a smile. “Thank you, dear. He’s probably getting hungry. I’ll take him somewhere quiet.”
With those words, Alina also glances at us as if excusing herself from the room. I give her a small smile and a nod, avoiding looking at
Giovanni, while Jacinta raises her hand and gets up, putting her glass away.
“Do you mind if I join you?” She glances between Giovanni and me with an all-knowing squint. “It looks like you two need a moment here.”
Do we? I frown and look at Giovanni who meets my gaze with a similar frown of confusion. But at the same time, it’s the first time I’ve met his gaze today, and it makes me feel uneasy. I instinctively look away, fiddling with the folds of my dress. We haven’t talked properly since that argument in his apartment, and it has been hanging between us.
Has it been so obvious that even Jacinta noticed, though? I purse my lips slightly, frowning. Damn. I didn’t mean it to turn into something so childish. While I’m thinking about that, Alina and Jacinta leave, and when I look up I see that Giovanni is still by the doorway, looking awkward.
“You can come in,” I say after a moment, gesturing around. “It’s not like I’m gonna bite you.”
“I know you can,” he grumbles, walking over, and I chuckle. Yeah, I used to be a ferocious biter when we were kids, but how else was I
supposed to fight against this guy who looked like a teenager at the age of ten?
Eventually, Giovanni takes a place on the couch next to me, and while I’m threading my fingers through my chiffon skirt to give myself an excuse to not look at him, an awkward silence settles between us. I bite my lip from the inside. How am I supposed to do this? It’s not like I’m still angry with him. I mean, he’s my brother, even if he’s an asshole sometimes, but
“You know,” Giovanni says all of a sudden, and I look at him from the corner of my eye. He chuckles at that and looks in front of him, shaking his head. “I still think this whole idea is going to ruin your life.”
I huff and roll my eyes even though that’s exactly what I was thinking twenty minutes ago. But I can’t let him think he’s right, okay? I have to appear confident in my decision even if my heart is tight and cold on the inside.
“And the only reason I said what I said back then was because…I care about you,” Giovanni continues in a lower voice, and I blink in
surprise and turn to look at him. It’s rare for him to open his heart like this. “I don’t want you to end up with an asshole who will treat you like shit.”
He looks at me, and when our eyes meet, I see anger-but also a special kind of affection that I know we share for each other. After a short pause, he sighs and places his hand on my shoulder, squeezing it slightly.
“But if you want to do this for Mom and for the rest of Chicago, I am not going to stand in your way. I trust you, Bella.”
Giovanni offers me a tentative smile, and I can’t help but smile back at him, feeling my heart filling up with affection. God, why is my brother so silly, and why do I love him so much? I chuckle and lean closer to him, bumping our shoulders. Something heavy wraps around my heart, and I linger there, leaning against him and staring down at my dress.
“To be honest,” I say quietly, running my fingers over the skirt, “I don’t know myself if I’m doing the right thing. But…I know that it’s the only way to catch Gerardo and make him pay for everything. And even if Raul turns out to be such a bad match, well, I’ll just shoot him and run away.”
I try to sound light as I say the last words, but when I raise my head to look at Giovanni, I see a glint of sympathy in his eyes. He wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer for a quick peck on my temple.
“It’s gonna be alright. You can always leave him,” Giovanni says with a low voice and turns to look down at me with a serious expression.
Damn, how is he still so tall? “But if he ever treats you badly, I’ll shoot him first, and be damned all your deals, understand?”
I huff and roll my eyes, putting my head on his shoulder, but the warmth that his words send to my heart makes me smile. Giovanni is the only person in the world who can make me feel safe, and even though he can be a dumbass sometimes, I’d protect him with my life-and he, I’m sure, would do the same for me.
We sit in silence for a few minutes, each thinking our own thoughts, until a bell rings in the distance. The first cue that the ceremony is about to start. The sound sends a ripple of nervousness through my heart, and I sit up straight, tightening my hold on the dress. This is it, god, this is it…
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Giovanni asks in a low voice, looking at me with a serious expression, and even though a part of me is hesitating, I nod and give him a tight smile.
“I am sure.”
There’s no way back from here.
Giovanni only nods, stands up, holds out his hand for me, and together we walk down to the first floor where, in a separate room, we wait for the third ring of the bell. The mixed feelings about the ceremony tie a knot in my guts, and even though Giovanni tries to distract me with some silly comments, I can only give him automatic smiles while my heart starts to beat faster and faster.