AMELIA
Watching Rose throwing balls for the dogs brings it all back. It’s been three months since the night Leo vanished. Before he came along, I was happy enough, working at the shelter, doing my best to keep Cam off my back, dreaming of a future where I was a veterinarian.
Then he burst into my life, bringing me a dog and a broken heart. Thanks for that.
I’ve changed a lot since I met him. I’m more independent now. Stronger. Not richer. Of course. I never did get the money.
It’s not just me that’s changed. The entire town is different. Warehouse twelve is a pile of ash and rubble. The council is talking about doing something, but it’ll be years before that gets resolved. Look at the Mansfield place. That’s been an eyesore for years and is still sitting there rotting right now.
Molly has been set up in the lighthouse for years, sending out anonymous messages to fuck with the Gianni famiglia.
Molly’s place got demolished. What was left of it, anyway. The Feds spent a long time looking through the remains for any clues that could back up my story.
Turns out Molly kept a lot of secrets in a fireproof box in her basement, a box that didn’t burn up with the rest. Well, it wouldn’t, would it? The clue’s in the word fireproof.
The information in that box made the casino chip superfluous. Hark at me with the big words. Maybe I’m growing up a bit. Had to happen eventually, I guess.
The Belucci famiglia is in big trouble. Most of them are in custody and the few who are left in this state have disappeared. Rumor has it they’ve gone to Europe. The Belucci Don appeared on the news in handcuffs, refusing to say anything.
It looks like it’s all over. The casino hasn’t opened since that night. The Feds have looked into that too. I’m guessing they have found nothing as tomorrow night is the grand reopening.
Part of me wonders if Leo is going to be there. I doubt it. I haven’t seen or heard a thing since he vanished. Second time. More fool me, right?
I’m trying to get over him and I’m getting there. It’s difficult. He changed my life, woke up parts of me that had been asleep forever, and it’s difficult to send them back to sleep.
I know I’ll get there though. Somehow.
I never got my winnings from the casino. Sometimes I get pissed about that. Other times I think it wasn’t really my winnings, anyway.
I bet with money that wasn’t mine on a crooked roulette table. It’s no surprise he kept the money. Probably bought another wing on his mansion, wherever that is. Men can’t be trusted. That’s all there is to it.
I watch as Rose throws the balls and I realize she might be the only one unaffected by all this. She came out of the warehouse and just got straight back to work, feeding the dogs, walking them, doing all the myriad things that a shelter needs to do every day.
Moira’s struggling. When the Feds questioned her, she just started crying. Ended up on medication for a while. Might still be on it as far as I know. She’s thinking of retiring, though. That would leave the town without a vet if she does.
I’m trying to get her to hold off until I’m qualified. Maybe I can take the reins from her at that point. Not sure how I’m going to afford it, though.
I might have to close the shelter and find better-paying work somewhere. The grant the council gave us to keep going won’t last forever.
It weighs heavily on me to think about the shelter, especially when I see how much joy it brings to Rose. She’s laughing as the balls get dumped at her feet repeatedly.
Makes me smile. I’m trying my best to smile when I can.
It’s the nights that are the worst. That’s when it all comes back to me. All of it. Leo in my house. The things he did to me. The things I did to him.
My body heats up and I miss him so much it’s like a stabbing sensation, jabbing me all over. Those are the nights that I wish he’d at least get in touch, let me know whether he’s thought about me since he left.
I don’t want to think about him. My brain betrays me. It waits until I’m almost asleep. Some nights it brings other things. The men on fire. The explosions. Molly getting shot. The fact my best friend was the snitch.
I struggled to believe it even after all I’d seen. Until they found that fireproof box and everything in it.
The things she had been doing were disgusting. So many shipments had gone out of the warehouse and she kept a careful record of all of it. If the house hadn’t burned down, they never would have found it.
Hidden in the basement behind so much crap, no one would have thought to look through it all. But the fire meant it was the only thing that wasn’t ashes.
I don’t need a best friend anymore. I can cope on my own. I can get through life on my own.
Except at night. That’s the time when I want to be held.
“I’m going to head for home,” I tell Rose. “You all right locking up when you’re done?”
“Sure thing, boss,” she says with a grin as she throws another ball to the end of the enclosure. “Any plans for tonight?”
“Ice cream and pajamas.”
“Sounds good.”
I head out. I walk through the shelter and remember my grandma, how she founded this place all those years ago.
I bump into Moira on the way home. She’s got a dog by her side, one she got from me. If there’s one thing dogs are good for, it’s healing. A little spaniel with a lopsided grin and a tail that whips so hard through the air it could bruise you.
“How’re you?” I ask as I see her approaching. I kneel to fuss Sophie while we talk.
“Doing all right,” Moira replies. “Had the Feds back at mine yesterday.”
“Again? What was it this time?”
“The same questions. Any sign Molly was up to this? Anything I want to tell them I forgot to mention. Tell us again what happened in the warehouse. When will they leave me alone, Amelia?”
“They’re just being thorough, so it’ll all stand up in court.”
“I know, I know. I just wish they’d let me forget it all.”
A squad car rolls past. I look inside. The new sheriff. He gives us a nod and continues on his way. Moira taps her watch. “Best get on.”
“See you later.”
She heads off. I watch her go. I hope she’ll be all right. She didn’t deserve to get wrapped up in any of this.
I get to my place and unlock the front door. I always lock it now. Never leave it open. The place is a lot more secure. The entire town locks its doors at night. No one is sure if it’s really all over.
We had news crews down here, talking about the spike in crime. Got called Mob Town for a while. Dying down now, though. The news cycle moves on.
I look through my mail. Bills, more bills, and more bills. Then something different.
It’s a cream envelope. The paper feels expensive. There’s something inside it too, something too thick to be a letter. I tear it open and out falls a casino chip. It rolls onto the floor.
I pick it up. There’s no number on the front, just the words Casino Hotel stamped in white. On the back, a note has been etched into the surface. Kapoor Suite. 8 pm. Leo.
I read the words, but I don’t think they’re real. I look around me, but there’s no one to ask about it. I’m on my own.
The Kapoor Suite. I load my laptop and type it into the search engine. The penthouse right at the top of the hotel, six thousand dollars a night at peak season. Leo wants me to go there at eight tonight?
I don’t know what to do. I could go. He could be there. It could be wonderful and we could live happily ever after. But how likely is that? Life isn’t like that. What’s more likely is he’s back in town and wants some easy sex. Well, I’m not that kind of girl.
Sure, it would be good to get laid and I know just how good he is in bed. But there’s the fact I’ve spent three months trying to get over him. I’m doing good at it too. The last thing I need is a reminder of how amazing he is in bed.
He’ll just vanish again and I’m not spending my life like that, waiting around forever for him to come and go whenever he feels like it.
There’s also the chance this is a trick. That it isn’t Leo up there. I’ve seen Casino. I know how they tricked Joe Pesci into that cornfield.
This might be a way of tying up another loose end. Get me in the casino while it’s still shut and then I’m gone, unable to tell the Feds anything about Leo or the Gianni family.
Do I go or not go?
It gets around to seven in the evening and I’ve still not decided. I’ve given myself a headache trying to make my mind up. I take something for my head and drink a glass of water. I don’t feel hungry. I need to decide. Am I going to take the risk or play it safe? Do I let my bet ride?
I look in my closet. I’ve got plenty of clothes to choose from, not much that suits what I have planned though.
I pick out a dress with a thigh slit, not because I’m going, just because I’m still deciding and I want to be ready in case.
I lay the dress on my bed and then jump in the shower. When I’m done in there, I sort my hair and makeup. I straighten the curls and look at myself.
“Not bad,” I say out loud. Then I get dressed. Last thing I do is strap the gun I bought to my thigh. If they’re going to try to take me out, I’m going out fighting.
I look at the casino chip again, trying to work out what to do. Time is running out. I need to decide or the clock will decide for me.
Nothing says I have to climb into bed with him. In fact, I won’t do that. If he’s there, if this isn’t a trick, then I’ll talk to him. I want to know why he vanished that night without saying goodbye. I deserve that, at least.
I can tell him how I’m doing, how I don’t need him. It’s a lie, but one I need to tell. I can’t tell him how I go to bed every single night wishing he was by my side. He’s a city mobster.
He’s not the type to want to settle in a small town with a girl like me. He’s probably got a dozen women in the city crawling all over him.
What can I offer compared to them? Poverty and an animal shelter. Oh, and my gran’s house. Score, right?
I look at the time. If I’m going to do this, I need to go now. I’m dressed. I’m ready. But what’s my decision? Stay or go? Play it safe or risk it all?